Food issues with DS worse now he's a teen than when he was little - please tell me it is a phase

[pollycazalet]

I'm not sure anyone can help me with this but it might help me to vent.

DS 14 is so hard to please in terms of food. I'm beginning to hate putting food on the table and I always used to love cooking.

We're not the most straightforward family. DD and I eat fish but not meat. I don't really eat carbs (although I don't think the kids notice but it makes meals a bit more complex to plan -totally my issue though I accept). DD eats most of the things I cook although has her favourites, as we all do. DH eats anything and is grateful and appreciative - thank goodness for him.

DS is incredibly fussy. He eats meat but is picky about what sort. He gets meat a couple of times a week and I also buy meat for him to put in sandwiches. I don't cook meat but his dad does so he can have it as a roast, with pasta etc. He won't eat anything I would describe as vegetarian - ie he doesn't like pulses, lentils, vegetable based dishes. He'll eat a veg sausage at a push and quorn. He is fussy about fish - will eat a piece of fish pan fried or roasted but hates things in sauces. He loves takeaways of course - pizza and chicken tikka although I am currently cooking a fish korma which he's turned his nose up at.

I just find it so bloody time consuming trying to make a meal we can all sit down and eat. Food is important to me and sitting down sharing meals is something I want us to do. Any suggestions or can you reassure me it's just a phase and his taste buds are maturing?

I'd love to say he'll get better, mine hasn't. Its seems he likes things 'this week'.
He won't eat vegetables, would live on takeout if I'd buy it. He only eats mashed potato with steak/pork chop and rice with chicken.
I make our meal eg curry & rice and then griil chicken plain for him. I gave up the rows long ago, he's 16 this year.
No help whatsoever but your not alone.

Probably won't get better.

I understand that you are vegetarian, but you may need to try to find ways of getting more meat into your teenage boy. DS could demolish two whole chickens at age 14.

My DS will eat no veg, or fruit except in pies. He eats any amount of meat and potatoes, meat and pasta, meat in sandwiches. Thank goodness he likes tomato based sauces.

Taste buds mature over the years. Everybody's mature at slightly different rates. Our sweet taste buds are there first and savoury develop.
Your son has probably not developed a sophisticated palette yet and the food you would like him to eat probably tastes horrid to him at the moment.
We teach our kids eating habits from copying us not what we say. If you display that it's ok to be fussy about food your teaching him that's ok for him to do.
I'd give up trying to get him to eat your dishes. Let him have the opertunity to taste it and when his taste buds mature he can then join in with your meals.
Could dad make and freeze some burgers, marinaded chicken pieces etc that you can cook for him in stead. There would be minimal handling for you , pop them in pita bread or a bun with coleslaw and onions and he might be happy lad.
It's hard to get it right. Believe me I get it wrong all the time.

I do get meat for him but he's not over keen on that really. As I said he'll eat a roast, and cold meats in sandwiches.
I know some 14 year olds are eating vast amounts but he isn't.

DS1 is 15 and he has always been picky. His meals revolve around chicken mainly. He refuses to try anything new so I have given up on that.
It's all the contradictions that bug me. Won't drink milk but will drink hot Chocolate, eats ketchup but not tomatoes, eats pizza but not cheese.

He will only eat chicken breast too. No dark meat. No bones either.

But if I was to write down everything he does eat it's not a bad balance I suppose.

Thanks - have tried meal planning and cooking. Maybe I need to try again. I was picky as a teen too and now I eat everything except meat. So I guess there is hope.

Sparklingbrook looking at DS's diet he does eat a range of things, just not in a meal! For eg last night he are some smoked salmon, smoked cheese and melon watching the football. He does eat a few veggies and a range of fruit. Mainlines Nutella though......

YY same here polly. DS1 had a bowl of strawberries and grapes as a pre dinner snack. Dinner itself was Hunters Chicken which he made into a sandwich with Ciabatta.

How do you get on when eating out? the fussiness sometimes sucks all the fun out here.

Eating out fine as long as it's Italian, sushi or roast!

That's quite varied polly.

That sounds more positive than negative.

If your problem is that it's time consuming and a pita for you (both planning and cooking and remembering the extra element on a daily basis) then maybe hand over full responsibility to DS and his dad. They can plan and cook and remember to defrost or whatever daily. You already have two sets of food preferences to work with so assigning responsibility for one set to the people who are actually eating that food isn't that much of a stretch. If DH left DS to manage some of his own cooking is there a chance DS would be prepared to take what was put in front of him a few nights a week simply because he knew the alternative was the bother of cooking something for himself?