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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

Moody non speaking teens.

14 replies

RedRoses · 14/04/2014 22:54

Anyone have one ?
How do you deal with it.?
I have been told that he is a 'toddler in a teens body'
And just ignore it, chat as normal etc...
He just sits silently and hardly talks....and then in a couple days slowly comes out if it
Delightful when he is not silent...
He is fine with his mates
They are odd aren't they..

His brothers were very different ..

Anyone else have a teen like this.

OP posts:
Nocomet · 14/04/2014 23:00

DD2(13) manages to keep the grumpy teen act going for about five minutes.

Her cruel big sister (16) and me just laugh at her. It's very difficult being a 'proper' teen when even DSIS sides with the oldies!

Original poster
RedRoses · 14/04/2014 23:08

Oh mine keeps it going for days.
He is fine with his siblings just his Ma and Pa ;)
He is 17...

OP posts:
singaporefling · 14/04/2014 23:10

Yes we're on our FIFTH teen (3rd DS 'Kevin') - They've all been a bit different mood-wise but all been non-communicative/truculent/sulky/stroppy at various times. Until a mate rings them/they're talking on the xbox etc and they turn into human beings suddenly! Our older DS's (now 27/30) could NOT be more charmng/polite/chatty/loving... It's a phase - a bloody annoying one at times. DS16 'slumps' in from school in a foul mood, won't make eye-contact/'demands' tea/flings himself on the sofa - after feeding/watering and a bit of space he's like a different person! Cuddly/smiley/chatty/asking for foot rubs/showing me daft things on youtube etc and the mornings are even worse! Behaving normally/ignoring it does seem to help and then it passes Smile... Then they grow up don't they and you miss the 'daftness' of adolescence...

Original poster
RedRoses · 14/04/2014 23:12

Do you miss it? The others never had this..it is so silly and bonkers...
And fucking annoying too. Silent son at the table, silent son everywhere.

OP posts:
LadyMaryLikesCake · 14/04/2014 23:17

Ds is 15 and he does this occasionally but I don't think he hears me so it's not intentional. If he's concentrating on something (Xbox/laptop) then it doesn't register so I say it again, just a little louder, and it does. Otherwise he's a lovely boy (puberty's been kind to him and me)

singaporefling · 14/04/2014 23:23

Well, I miss the quirkiness/funny bit of adolescence - the questions they ask that make you think 'awww bless' and the cuddles when they're in the mood. But NO definitely won't miss the scowling silences or under-breath mutterings! DS16 frequently says he wishes he could open his bedroom door in the morning and we'd "all be gone" Confused so that we couldn't tell him what to do! And at times he clearly thinks I exist solely to spoil his day - and then it passes. Sounds like your DS manages to maintain it somewhat longer which is obviously very frustrating. But it's not YOU and he probably can't help it...

Original poster
RedRoses · 14/04/2014 23:28

'A toddler in a teenage body' is my mantra.
Thank god I have two older children who are gorgeous some kniw it is just a phase..thought a pretty extreme one..

OP posts:
Claybury · 15/04/2014 10:15

Just emerging from 2 to 3 years of silence. He's 16 1/2. The sudden realisation the other day that he started a conversation with me that wasn't totally essential. Chatting ! It is quite an adjustment for me , I had got used to not talking to him as my openings were always met with hostility.
I was especially upset when I saw how animated he was with mates, I felt he 'shut down ' when he came home. A shame really , when you just want to enjoy your teen and get to know them.
Getting better now!

PeachyTheSanctiMoanyArse · 15/04/2014 10:20

I have one, sometimes two.

DS1 has ASD but since becoming a teen has gone from so communicative everyone comments on his ability to nothing beyond mmmm and accusations of unfairness, ds2 is NT, a year younger and still has the odd Ok patch but is mainly in pretty much the same boat.

DS1 is not animated with mates or at school either, if ds2 is like his mates then he is animated but incredibly childish away from me.

They are both far better with just us (parents) than siblings.

Claybury · 15/04/2014 11:35

Cloud - my sympathy. But rest assured it's all pretty normal. Make the most of not being needed, in the same way at least, and get yourself a new hobby? Of course they do need you, after all how long would they last without you ?
We got a new dog recently and that brought the family together a bit - not for everyone , I know, but it has been a more positive experience with DS16 than I expected. Also good company on walks if your DC's won't come! And a great excuse to get out of the house

Original poster
RedRoses · 15/04/2014 15:50

Thanks clay bury
It is very odd for us as we have three other chatty older teens. It is almost a way of making himself noticed ...

OP posts:
Original poster
RedRoses · 15/04/2014 19:20

(Whispers)
He's talking......
I wonder how long it will last.....

OP posts:
HolidayCriminal · 19/04/2014 22:10

I would love sullen & quiet. I get shout & rude instead. :(

HolidayCriminal · 19/04/2014 22:11

*shouty

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