<Sob> Temporarily overwhelmed by DS1 and 2

[BoffinMum]

I am trying to work from home during August as I haven't got a lot of childcare, but DS (12) and DS (15) are driving me nuts. Despite my best efforts they are doing everything on an imaginary ticklist of annoying-but-not-illegal-or-immoral things, specifically designed to annoy a parent. Their minor but exasperating crimes include:

Smearing jam all over clean sheets from eating in bed
Peeing all over the place in the bathroom and making it stink
Toilet skid marks, no use of brush
No assistance in house whatsoever despite many disciplinary strategies
Lying in bed until lunch and then loafing about in pyjamas all day
Arguing and scrapping with each other
Bedrooms like fetid hellholes that time forgot (gave in and cleaned one today as I couldn't bear it any longer)
Banging on about the next thing they want me to buy for them
Refusing to their holiday homework from school
Refusing to do anything except muck about on their computers

I have tried everything I can think of to reign them in but I am wondering if there are things other people can think of. I am getting no work done and they have me in tears at the moment.

We aspire to DS wearing any of his three, new, respectable dressing gowns. It's skimpy boxers all the way here despite his sister having all of her gorgeous mates around all the time. He truly does not give a shit. While on the one hand I admire his lack of self consciousness, my inner Hyacinth is appalled

Katie,

We have the boxer syndrome too when his little goddaughters come round, or indeed anyone else. And I find dirty jeans on the kitchen table. Why?

Dirty jeans on kitchen table is better than several pairs of clean ( but v v crumpled) jeans in laundry basket I reckon

I am still getting pants inside trousers inside out in the laundry basket.

Oh yes, the inside out syndrome. I think that DD feels I'm not sufficiently challenged by the laundry so feels the need to help.
Last week I jeans with belt still attached and tissues in pocket, inside out with attached pants, the fact that all 3 items belong to me added a little piquancy, I must admit...

Have had a lightbulb moment - if we made putting stuff in laundry as complex as putting it away, would that work? Admittedly laundry basket would have to be a wardrobe with hangers...am considering if could fit that in corner

Howling at this thread was about to ask if boys are worse than girls but looking round me I see;

DD1's bra & shoes, a book, a pile of Uni stuff, half an uneaten choccy bar (ha! she overlooked that....it may have been eaten tidied away by the time she returns from town!)

DD 2's make up bag, hairbrush, breakfast pots, & various gubbins essential to teen life.

I haven't ventured into the bedrooms recently,the floordrobe is full in each am bracing myself.

My saving grace is DD1 can now drive so she has taken them both off to do essential shopping crap grazing.

So nice to know I'm not the only one. I have to remind DS13 to wash and change his clothes. DD17 boyfriend seems to have moved in as they have no money to go out and do things!! So I offered to pay for them to go to the cinema if they took DS with them. Peace

Boys of 17 and 15 here.
As soon as they walk through the door they peel off their clothes. Then if it's cold they wrap themselves in a manky blanket. DS1 has the ancient dressing gown which seems to live on the living room floor. Both live in boxers (if we are lucky - DS1 has no modesty).
We regularly run out of glasses because DS2 has 27 empty glasses in his pit.
They have breakfast at 12 and lunch at 2.30 which involves boiling enough pasta to feed an army.
I fear that I am a very bad mother because unlike every other MN parent I have totally failed to limit their screen time (I managed it until they hit about 14). DS2 is earning an Olympic medal on League of Legends. I finally knew things had hit rock bottom when I realised they were taking their laptops into the bathroom to balance on the loo so they could watch You tube while laying in the bath.

My DS is currently ecstatic because I finally caved and installed BT Sport. I also have provided Greggs for lunch today. I should be awarded a Shit Mother of the year badge but DS thinks I'm the nads

Ooh I have caved over BT sport too Katie. Bit miffed about the £15 connection fee but £12 a month better than Sky Sports robbery. I got a hug off smelly DS1 (last shower Thursday 7am). Ewww.

I got it for free but have dithered for months installing it as there is far too much football already in this house for my liking
DS keeps telling me how much I "rock". I'm going to regret this, aren't I?

I got it for free but have dithered for months installing it as there is far too much football already in this house for my liking
DS keeps telling me how much I "rock". I'm going to regret this, aren't I?

Oh yes Katie. Although lovely Jake Humphrey is presenting which makes it a bit better.

Oh, is there Totty ? ( perks up)

Yes, he's very nice. Used to do F1 coverage but he has had a baby recently so he's got a nice job not travelling the world bless him. He seems to know his stuff and is better than Gary Lineker IMO.

I think Clare Balding has a show on BT Sport at some point too.

I like spending time with their mates though as reassures me that mine are no worse. Just spent time by sea with various of their friends. Not 1 EVER

1. Got up before 11.30
2. volunteered to help with ANYTHING
3. Put a cup/glass anywheree other than where they'd been drinking it

ALL the girls however did

1. Get eye make-up all over the towels

ALL of both sexes did

1. Live out of Floor wardrobes
2. Not appreciate that wet towels on floor stay wet

They were all great fun though.

I love Claire B. Thank you!

Diamond I like it when we have visiting teens. They are vair polite.

One last week took all the rubbish out of the living room and put it in the bin.

I was going out last night. DD and her mate decided to act as stylist, beautician and hairdresser. I have to say the effect was incredible
DH jaw hit the floor when we did the reveal. He was giving me a lift to the event and only semi-jokingly asked if rather than attending, I fancied a run along the country roads for a spot of tomfoolery.
He was disappointed

secret I lost the screen time battle at about the same time as you - about 14yo. I think that now, at 17yo, there is no hope. I discovered on holiday recently that DD texts while in the bath! I gave a huge lecture on her electrocuting herself with the water, to which she replied 'I hold it out of the water to text and then put it on the floor while the other person replies'!

I have the wet towel problem too which others have spoken about. What used to drive me mad was when wet towels were left on her bed, but now I think 'well, it's not my bed'.

To those of you with DD, do you find the washbasins covered with a mist of blusher/powder all the time?

Yes mon, and my towels are either an impressionist masterpiece of lippy and dream matte mousse or stained to buggery with hair dye

Pleased to know it's not just me then Katie - but I have a tip to share. My DD will always take a new clean towel (the wet ones are on the floor/bed) so I put the old cardboard ones on the top of the clean pile in the bathroom and the nice newer fluffier ones at the bottom for my exclusive use .

That wouldn't work in our house DS1 just rifles through the neat stack until he finds his fave. Leaving destruction in his wake

love this thread
at least I have just the one teenage boy/man, I don't know, I never see ds1, 18, but his room is a mess, he leaves his dirty clothes on the bathroom floor and skid marks in the loo, I must talk to him about the loo brush, but I never see him, or he is on his way out, with an obliging friend, normally female.

the dds, 16 and 13, I have been working mainly and giving them busfares, and what not. but I was getting a leedle fed up with cooking and cleaning and cleaning so I can cook! so I had a shout.

how much longer the holidays now?