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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

Is 10:15pm too late for a 16yo to walk home alone?

92 replies

hellohellohihi · 27/05/2013 19:20

DN has just got her first p/t job - waitressing in a pub. Last night was her first shift and she walked home at 10:15pm on her own. It's about 15 mins along a busy road and through the high st.

MIL very unimpressed.

I can't work out if it's an issue or not. She's 16 and a half, just finishing gcses.

If its not on, at what age would it be acceptable?

Ps. My dd is a toddler still so no idea what's right for teenagers and I was quite mischievous so prob shouldn't go by my own experiences

OP posts:
ihearsounds · 30/05/2013 11:41

I think mil needs to butt out and mind her own business. This has nothing to do with her. As long as the girl and her parents are happy, then this is all that matters.

Fwiw, at 14 I used to babysit. Quite often the people would fall in after midnight. I would walk home on my own. And my own dd, who at 16 had a 10:30 curfew.

ShabbyButNotChic · 30/05/2013 15:49

I think this is fine as long as she is a vaguely sensible girl. At 16 i was working weekends then straight out after work clubbing! Getting home at 3/4am. I think as long as she is aware when shes walking, so not having ipod in etc then i wouldn't worry.

YDdraigGoch · 30/05/2013 15:52

My 17 year old DD walks home from a waitressing job far later than that - mostly because we are not prepared to wait up until the small hours for her to finish work (there is no specified time).

She'll be fine!

Bonsoir · 30/05/2013 16:33

seeker - Really? You mind that there aren't orchestras in your DC's school but you would happily have a 16 year old DD work in a bar in the evenings?

seeker · 30/05/2013 16:36

Bonsoir - that has to be the most bizarre post I have ever read! What on earth do you mean?

Bonsoir · 30/05/2013 16:37

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

seeker · 30/05/2013 16:45

Tell me more?

BackforGood · 30/05/2013 16:47

I think what would worry me is the fact it was a regular thing - my feeling is that if you happen to walk home from a friends, say, as a one off, then it would be statistically unlikely that anything would happen to you, but there's something about the fact it's a regular shift, and from a public place that it wouldn't take a genius to work out there would be likely to be young girls leaving their shifts there, and, sitting outside for a couple of evenings would confirm that.

Would MiL be prepared to pick her up on a rota basis, perhaps with the parents of a couple of the other waiters / waitresses ?

seeker · 30/05/2013 16:49

It's a busy high street at 10.15. If she's happy with it, then I'd let her.

seeker · 30/05/2013 16:50

Actually, bonsoir, that was aa really offensive post. Please could you either explain or retract.

EuroShaggleton · 30/05/2013 16:52

If the niece is ok with it, then I really don't see why not.

nickrhodesjewel · 30/05/2013 16:58

I remember being 15 walking back singing '10.15 on a Saturday night' by the Cure. This thread title made me remember that song! I always walked together with a friend tho. I would say it is too late to walk by yourself at that age.

RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie · 30/05/2013 17:02

LOVE that song, Nick - drip drip drip drip. :)

I wouldn't let my 16 year old do it, or my 18 year old tbh. A taxi would only be a couple of quid for such a short distance and I'd rather pay that, if we couldn't fetch her ourselves tbh.

RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie · 30/05/2013 17:03

Must admit I wouldn't want my 16 year old working in a bar either, but do think you are being somewhat out of order, Bonsoir tbh.

seeker · 30/05/2013 17:05

Working in a bar could mean waitressing,washing up, cooking- it won't mean serving behind the bar at 16! What on earth is wrong with that!

BackforGood · 30/05/2013 17:16

Seriously ???? Do people really think there's something wrong with a 16yr old waitressing in a pub / restaurant ??? Really ???

MrsHoarder · 30/05/2013 17:18

Can't 16yos, leave home if they want? Surely the time for curfews on walking home after work has passed?

RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie · 30/05/2013 17:18

I didn't say that there was anything wrong with it, just that I'd be happier if mine didn't.

seeker · 30/05/2013 17:20

Well, bonsoir obviously think's there's something wrong with it.......

Out of interest, Remus, what sort of work would you think Ok for a 16 year old?

RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie · 30/05/2013 17:25

Must admit I haven't thought about it much, but I suppose day time waitressing in a cafe would be an obvious one, or babysitting.

My issue with Bonsoir's posts was that she seems to think that parents who value certain 'middle class ideals' such as orchestras should therefore have certain other assumed values as well, which seemed odd to me (and possibly quite snobbish).

My personal feeling is that whilst I can help to ensure my children's safety where possible, then I ought to.

I look back in horror at some of the things I got up to at 16.

seeker · 30/05/2013 17:31

I can hardly think of a more middle class occupation than a little light waitressing in a wine bar, to be honest!

They can't work during the day, Remus-they are at school.

Still waiting for bonsoir to come back and justify her offensive comment.

RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie · 30/05/2013 17:33

I meant at the weekends.

RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie · 30/05/2013 17:46

I keep wanting to add a v Snape-ish, 'Obviously' after that. :)

insancerre · 30/05/2013 17:51

I would let my 16 yr old DD do this. She often walks home from her mates house about 15 mins away.
I used to do this at that age too.

VerySmallSqueak · 30/05/2013 17:54

If she's ok with it,I'd be ok with it.

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