It's been a week now

[minicreamegg]

and my 14yr old DD hasnt left the house once since the schools broke up last week instead she's sat in attached to her mobile. Is this the norm these days?

My 13 year old has only been out and about with me this week she has a lovely group of friends but is not interested at all in organising anything with them. I think if someone texted her and asked her to go out she would but she's not bothered. Spends a lot of time upstairs on her iPad

Mine are the same. DS never goes anywhere, but DD will go out if someone invites her. She never makes plans herself. So different from when DH and I were children.

I know when I think back to age 14, I was never in. Just seems like such a waste of the holidays to sit in a bedroom alone.

My 15yr old dd is the same! Hasn't been anywhere yet!

Totally normal - my DS's (17 and 18) have been hermits for several years now, relishing any time when college is closed to basically stagnate in their rooms.
They only ventured out once this Easter break and that was through necessity to get their hair cut.
DS1 even has his own car, but I drive it more than he does just to stop it seizing up!
It's depressing to see them waste so much time shut away in their own little worlds, but I guess it's the way things are these days.

Can you limit the phone/screen time or am I being naive about this age group. I have 12 year olds and let them lounge around on screens in the mornings of school hols but ban them in the afternoons. This seems to motivate them a bit to organise something and go out.

Can you not just turf them out and send them into town? Or to get some exercise?

Dd 15 has not had a day in yet but has spent 3 days helping at sn club. Today she is staying home.

Ds17 revising for exams so has been in working, but had a day at a course and will go camping for 2 days with scouts. Had one evening with friends has been to see gf.

As a younger member of this forum (still in college) I'd just like to put a possibilty out there to consider!

At the ages of around 15 and 16 I was very similar- although maybe not so! I was quite depressed, self-harmed and had suicidal thoughts. I didn't want to go out because my friends all knew something was up and the more time i spent with them, the more they asked, and the more time i spent alone the futher into my self indulgent depression i could sink. I was good at hiding it at home as i was never very close to my family unfortunately and they didnt question me sitting in my room alone, which was the worst part for me- the ones who were supposed to care most didnt even notice until it got very bad, and even then it was somewhat brushed under the carpet. All i'm trying to say is make sure you communicate with them to rule out this possibilty as its an awful thing to any parent or child to go through! (I'm very well now though thanks to some lifestyle changes, hard work and positivity)

Good for you coulditbe.

May not be relevant, but we never allowed televisions in bedrooms, which meant that if they were dossing around watching Jeremy Kyle, at least we knew about it! I think communicating is a habit that you can get out of, which can't be good for anyone.