'...it's bad enough a 60 year old playing up for sympathy, my concern is the 11 year old has seen this and thought I know that works I'll have a go.'
Heswall, no -- this is not what is happening here. Your DD is in the throes of something that is getting the better of her. This is not behaviour resulting from a conscious decision of hers.
'I have made sure my DD has lead a charmed existence and now I don't quite know what it is she needs recusing from at the age of 11 I really don't.'
This is not a child who is ungrateful for all that you have provided, or a child punishing you for working full time, or a matter of providing more for her or feeling guilty that what has been provided has not been enough. Please don't resent her for her problem or feel that she is throwing your efforts back in your face. She is not.
'What I don't want is for her to get lots of 1 to 1 time, trips to see various people and as a result all the positive attention she gets is surrounding this because I will not have time for anything else it will take every ounce of spare energy I have, that's why I so so hoping she's just had a shit time at school or fallen out with somebody.'
Yes, you are frustrated with her, but she is not doing this on purpose. You are catastrophising here. You need to stop. This is not about you and your time and your perceptions, or your fears. She absolutely needs 1 on 1 time and attention from a professional to get to the bottom of this problem of hers.
'lets hope we can nip this in the bud...'
This is not bad behaviour that can be nipped in the bud, or wished away, or mothered away.
'I'm happy to acknowledge that she is unhappy but what do you say when she tells me I think she's mad and will send her away in response ? I have never said either to her or implied it.'
You need to stop taking this so personally. She is not mad with you. She is not rejecting you. She is ill. It is scary when someone you love is seemingly out of your reach, but you have to go beyond your own comfort zone here, see beyond your own hurt, and get her the help she needs.
'By taking her to the GP i proved that i thought she was mad that's what i am up against...'
She knows there is something wrong and that is why she said that, and you are not up against anything, least of all your DD. She is telling you in every way she can that she needs help. You have to take charge here, put the problem in the hands of people who know what they are doing.
'maybe going private would be better? I want this resolving asap.'
Private is the way to go if camhs would take too long to get their act in gear. But there is no magic pill here. There will be no 'asap'. Your DD will need help over a long period of time, and you will need to get on board with whatever course of medication or therapy is recommended for her.
'It isn't about me I realise that but equally I am the adult in charge here and I am not going to be pushed into anything that might have long term effects or be more damaging than doing nothing so I'll be considering each step carefully hence why I asked about what the school can do.'
Doing nothing here is the one choice guaranteed to result in damage. You must seek help for your DD. You may well be the adult but are not in charge of whatever problem she has. You cannot command it to go away. You are not in control here any more than you would be if your DD developed malaria. She is not some nuisance of a child creating problems for you and making outrageous claims on your time and attention. She is not being manipulative. She needs serious help.