Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Flip

Original poster

18th birthday celebrations

12 replies

senua · 13/03/2012 10:21

What's the 'done thing' for birthday celebrations these days? For DD we hired the village hall and got a DJ. It will be DS's turn in the next six months and, trying to forward plan, I floated the idea. He thinks DJs are old hat and i-pod/spotify will do the trick but I'm not sure that it would work in a hall. They might be fine for house parties, but there is no way that I am having a house party.
He is one of the older ones in the year so going out to clubs or pubs won't work because most aren't of an age to have ID.
What do 18 y.o. do to celebrate these days?

OP posts:

balancein2012 · 13/03/2012 15:01

I think it depends of your budget and what sort of person your DS is.

I have proposed to DD that she has a smallish crowd round for a few drinks and something to eat and that they then go off into town to go clubbing and meet up with a larger crowd at about eleven.

She wants more people than I am comfortable with and I don't want to budge. Not because I don't trust her or her friends (I wouldn't be going out anyway - I'd be in the house, sorting out the food etc) but just because I already feel slightly overwhelmed about catering for a crowd.

Some of her friends have hired a venue and people have bought their own drinks, some have had a house-party, some have had a dinner party at home and one had a massive marquee with waiters and a sit down three course meal and a disco.

Original poster

senua · 13/03/2012 19:39

"a massive marquee with waiters and a sit down three course meal and a disco."

Blimey! I'm not in that league. What a nice idea but I fear it may be unsuitable for autumn.

How much catering do your crowd actually need? Can't you get away with something like a huge vat of bolognaise or chili. I doubt that they will want to stuff themselves - although mum will fret about them lining their stomachs - they'll want to leave space for chips or kebabs on the way home.

OP posts:

balancein2012 · 14/03/2012 22:53

We're absolutely not in the "massive marquee" club either! It was the most amazing party, by all accounts though.

Yes - I'm thinking of chilli con carne or something similar for all the obvious reasons. It's just the numbers that we're not agreed on.

My DD is always pushing for more. If I budge, I know she's needle away and the numbers will run up and up and up.

RitesForGirls · 15/03/2012 00:02

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet.

BackforGood · 15/03/2012 00:19

My d neice was 18 this school year.
There's a bar (at a gym, funnily enough!) near to the school where a lot of the 6th form have their parties.
You have to pay for the bouncers for an 18th.
They are only allowed in if their name is on the guest list, provided in advance by the host (great, saves gatecrashers - and the local kids all know this, so don't bother trying to get into other people's parties).
When the youngsters arrive, they have to show some ID - out in proper light, in the foyer, and if the bouncers are happy, then they get a wristband (like those all inclusive things - the type you can't take off and on).
During the evening they can only get served if they have a wrist band on. During the evening the bar staff and bouncers take drinks off anyone who isn't wearing a wristband.

I was really impressed.
They don't bother with food, but do seem to have a DJ.

Don't know if that helps.

Original poster

senua · 15/03/2012 11:28

Your idea sounds good B4G (especially the bouncers) but we can't do anything official because, being one of the oldest in the year, most of his mates won't have the ID to drink. The ideal place would be the Rugby Club but I don't think they would thank me for introducing potential under-age drinkers.
The rite of passage sounded a nice idea until I read this. I'll have to think of something a bit tamer!

OP posts:

BackforGood · 15/03/2012 19:07

I have a Sept birthday for my youngest dc - I too can imagine there's going to have to be a bit of tactical stuff, as it will be much easier for dc1 to have an 18th birthday party as he's a june birthday.
Even with swimming parties - he could have one when he was 8 as all his friends were already 8, but she had one for her 9th, in order to wait for all her friends to turn 8. Ican't see her wanting to wait and have a "19th" birthday celebration instead though

ColourMeWithChaos · 15/03/2012 19:14

We had DS's down the rugby club, but I have to be honest and say I left rather early (DS7 was a whole 4 weeks old).

Most of his friends were already 18 so that wasn't too much bother, although I'm pretty sure under 18s came and drank (it was technically a private event or something?). DH, my 3 brothers and DH's brothers were there to make sure nothing kicked off, but to be honest they didn't have to do too much as nothing kicked off.

Food wise we had curry in massive pots with rice, naan etc. early on in the night and music wise one of DS's friends has a band so they played a bit and then another one DJed for the rest of the night.

I felt better about this than DS going out with his friends to the nearest big town clubbing as I felt we could at least vaguely supervise the situation. (and from what has happened since that was not definitely the right idea)

ColourMeWithChaos · 15/03/2012 19:32

I mean that was definitely the right idea!

mumblechum1 · 19/03/2012 10:34

DS is going to be 18 on the 3rd Sept, so none of his friends will officially be able to drink. He's not fussed about having a party anyway.

I'm thinking of sending him and his best friend to Amsterdam for a weekend in a 4 star hotel three day bender

pinkbraces · 19/03/2012 10:41

MyDD is 18 in June, just after the end of her exams :) we are having a party at home on the Friday, it will be a mix of her friends and family, lots of food, music and a vodka watermelon! We did this for her 16th (minus the vodka watermelon) and it was a great night.

Its a weekend of celebration for her though, as two of her other friends have birthdays at the same time and there is a similar party on Saturday and Sunday night. In fact the 3 birthday kids all arranged which one was having which night. She is very glad hers is first because by the time the Sunday bash comes around they will be knackered.

RavenVonChaos · 20/03/2012 07:23

After much deliberation my daughter has decided she wants a family meal and a night out clubbing with friends.

There will be about 13 adults and 10 children for the family meal - our house is tiny so have decided to push the boat out and go to a hotel. I am getting a private room with a terrace overlooking a Marina. Having a 3 course sit down or hot and cold buffet (need to decide). It is very expensive and probably going to set us back about £600.

I using it as an excuse to get the family all together as this never happens.

Flip