Ds1 having LOUD sex and I have had to tell them to shut up...

[lilibet]

Honestly!! I love my ds1 very much but there is no 18 year old boy born who could make a girl shriek like that.

She is from the Meg Ryan school of sex noises but AMPLIFIED

I also can't beleive the brass neck of her - she faced us all afterwards without even a blush.

It's not the first time either, we weren't in a while back and dd (23) and ds2 (15) could hear her down stairs. Ds2 went and banked on the door and said "Do you mind, some of us are trying to revise" God Bless Him!!

I had a word with them then but it's not stopped them, they now can't be in his room with the door closed.

They don't prepare you for conversations like this at antenatal classes

[ChickensHaveNoLips]

Oh God. I would die. And then I'd come back to life and kill them. Then I'd die again. Then I'd handle it badly through embarassment, probably cry, and afterwards feel bad for the girl who is just immature and silly and would be mortified at having her BF's mother causing a scene. But there would be a scene. I'm far to fucking English to be ok with my offspring getting loudly jiggy within earshot

[lilibet]

First time it happened (after ds2 banged on the door) I spoke to him and told him that in future they must be silent as no one wanted to hear them.

This time I waited till (ahem) afterwards and went in and blasted them both that we could hear them having sex and they needed to show us some respect. I said that for the next month they could not have the door clsoed and after that time it would be reviewed. I then said that these were now my rules and if they didn't like them they could go to her house and let her family listen to them have sex for a change.

Yes, they are having sex as I walked in on them once (when they were being quiet) and was that amazed all I managed to comment on whas how well ds1 had hoovered the carpet

[harrietlichman]

What has the world come to?! In my day it was a in your car/in bed when parent's were out or as quiet as hunanly possible on the sofa when parents were in bed. And that's the way it should be, IMHO.

[SamsGoldilocks]

hoovering the carpet - what a brilliant comment

[lilibet]

Sams I still when I think of it

When she stays overnight I make him sleep on the sofa - I'm wasting my time, aren't I?

[EnjoyResponsibly]

Just did a an actual bit of wee at the carpet admiration comment. Genius :0 :0 :0

[Isaidhangonamin]

my DS1 went to live in Thailand for 6 months to get his "fun"

[scummymummy]

lol @ this thread, Especially @"Pack that in. You sound ridiculous." And you commenting on your son's hoovering skills, lilibet (fnarfnar).

[trikken]

Id be very embarrassed if I was the Gf. We used to try and be as quiet as humanly possible whilst still living at home. it is quite disrespectful.

[Annunziata]

Oh my god!!! Actually, it's horrible and funny at the same time!

I love the applause idea.

[bringbacksideburns]

Weird innit - that the GF doesn't care? I would be so mortified!!

[RabidEchidna]

Go in with a note pad and pen and tell him you are taking notes , or better still when they come out hold up score cards and shout sevennnnnnn

[Annunziata]

She must have some brass neck, I couldn't look MIL in the eye for about six months after DH and I got married!

[fabwoman]

Annunziata - I couldn't look at my MIL when she came to visit after I had had dc1 as she would know I had shagged her son since I had just had his baby . By baby 3 I didn't care!

[MadameChinLegs]

Take the door off the hinges.

Tell them they can have it back as a moving in present on their love shack.

[MadameChinLegs]

OR get a massive photo of yourself and hang it on his ceiling. With a stern look in your eye.

[Auntiestablishment]

Maybe she's making a racket so you don't walk in on them again.

You might notice he'd not hoovered the carpet.

[AnyFucker]

erm, your house is being used as a teenage sex den, complete with wild penguin noises and everybody thinks this is "funny" ?

I remember when people used to think they should be afforded some respect in their own home

OP, tell your son that when he is paying the mortgage/rent on his own place, he (and his ridiculous squealing gf) can make all the sex noises he likes, but not before then

[GurlwiththeFrothyCurl]

This may be about to happen in our household as DS2 has just announced that he is in his first relationship. We have said that he is welcome to invite her over in the Uni holidays, so watch this space...

[cakeismysaviour]

Yuck!

Don't let her go up to his room anymore and no staying over. They need to learn some respect.

[AnyFucker]

my teenage dd likes to think that because she happens to live in this house, she gets to make the rules

she does not

when she gets her own place, she gets to make the rules

I suspect I will be banned from her place when she gets one (on current targets, that will be approx. in 2025)

I won't hold my breath...until then, I will not not be disrespected in my own home

[mmmdanone]

Similar thing happened to us before DS1 went off to uni - his bedroom is next to ours and when his girlfriend stayed round you could hear banging headboard on wall (thankfully no sex noises from him or her) . I'ts hard when you realise your DC's are having a better sex life than you :)

[lilibet]

Anyfucker that was more or less my speech, dd and ds2 were listening in and they said I was magnificent

Oh Yes!! Go me!!!!