Mobile phone and spy software??

[indigokate]

Hi..This is my first post and i just wanted some advice concerning mobile phone spy software. My daughter is 15 and has a blackberry. She is a sensible and intelligent girl but very secretive despite us being a close family. She had an eating disorder at 13 (now fully recovered) which possibly stemmed from her being unable to talk about various issues and problems. We have both worked hard to keep communication open but by her own admission she finds it very hard to open up and prefers to keep things to herself.Although my son is quite open with his mobile phone and texts etc... my daughter is completely the opposite giving me the impression she is hiding something. Is it wrong and i am battling with this one, so i think deep down i think it is, to download some sort of software onto her phone?? I pay the bill on her contract and if i have asked who she is texting/speaking too or what she is looking at i am given very short shrift. I have explained to her that this type of behaviour makes me suspicious but i am told "tough" in so many words. Any advice would be much appreciated. Thank you

At 15, I don't think you necessarily need to worry about what she's hiding from you, unless you have other worries as well it is probably just a desire for privacy - no way I would have told my parents who I was calling at that age.

But if you have worries about her, how about getting itemised billing rather than putting a "spy" on her phone? We now have this on DSs phone, and it tells us who he has called/texted and when. We did it to try to work out why his bill was so high. For fairness you might need to do the same on your son's phone as well.