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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

Teenage girls why are they sooooooo demanding and difficult

11 replies

lialin · 09/11/2010 18:03

Hello All mums with teenagers

I have a 14 year old daughter, as a child she has always been stubborn, strong headed, never have I thought teenage years are so stressful to dealwith everyday! She doesnt listen to anything you say, all she wants to do is go out with friends, facebook, texting and utube, school work is never on the agenda, shouts and totally goes barmy if she doesnt get what she wants and plays depression syndrome on you to make you feel bad and guilty for telling her off! Is there a boot camp for these kids in the UK. Is it just me being a bad and totally unequipped mother?

OP posts:
mumeeee · 09/11/2010 22:32

That sounds like Normal Teenage behavior. Try and pick your battles and also keep calm when she shouts. She will grow out of it sometime.

bucksmum · 10/11/2010 10:33

Welcome to my world!

Tikitikitembo · 10/11/2010 10:36

Sounds normal. Being a teenage girl is horrible. Make sure you can spy on her Facebook page.

sue52 · 10/11/2010 14:54

Sounds normal. My daughter declined my facebook friend request, so her elder sister does my spying for me. They do grow out of it eventually.

Monty27 · 10/11/2010 15:08

She sounds very normal :)

oldenoughtowearpurple · 10/11/2010 15:13

Try sending her to Mallory Towers or St Clare's. The teenage girls in Enid Blyton books were't like that. They just had midnight feasts and played hockey a lot.

Sadly I can also affirm that this relatively normal. Only advice is to let them get into some trouble eg skip their homework then tell them I Told You So when they get it in the neck. Won't make any difference but will make you feel better.

cyberbeeb · 10/11/2010 17:29

hi, my daughter is exactly the same, except she is in GCSE year and getting her to do even minimal amounts of work is wearing me out! Threat of total grounding seems to have worked a little - we live in rural area so prospect of no lifts and no money seems to have made her think. BTW she will not add me as friend on facebook - any other way to spy on her? Is it ethical?

Sounds really bad, but she does have good days and she is hilarious, sometimes intentionally, sometimes not.

DustDustDust · 10/11/2010 18:10

Very normal. It's not your fault.Smile
Although I resent those saying we're all like that. I'm 16 and I'm lovely, tbh.Grin

"^
Try sending her to Mallory Towers or St Clare's. The teenage girls in Enid Blyton books were't like that. They just had midnight feasts and played hockey a lot.^"
Not always! There's one where they play cruel tricks on Mam'zelle and then it turns out her sister's ill and her mental health isn't good. She laughs about it in the end, but still, little demons!Shock

toomanytimes · 10/11/2010 20:32

Hi I am tired and completely stressed, just spent another hour with DD 14 and CAHMS. No progress there, she is totally vile and verbally abusive, does completely what she wants to do with no consideration of others. Grounding does not work, homework is totally non existent and now leave this up to school to put consequences in place. She only goes to school because other wise I will stop her weekly allowance. Just has another argument over money, she wants a new cover for her Blackberry, (she should be lucky to have a blackberry) not content with its colour, she wants to change the facia. Wants a new cd player but will not wait for xmas, but at the same time wants money for new clothes because heavens above she has to wear last years clothes or even clothes that are 2/3 months old. Believe you and me, we did not bring her up like this. Told her to go and get a job if she wants new clothes every few months. At the weekend I broke a rule and went into her room to clean it, only because she was complaining that it was such a S*hole, despite that fact she has trashed her room, made holes in the door and walls, make up smeared all over the walls, so who is to blame here, anyway thought I would do something nice for her and clean it for her, spent 4 hours on Saturday, do you think I got any thanks, no such luck, only for her to scribble on the walls afterwards. That feels like a kick in the teeth. So fed up do not know what to do.

Ineed2 · 10/11/2010 20:48

I wouldn't be giving her any money, toomany, if she makes your life a misery she would be getting it back from me big time. Dd1 went through a pretty difficult stage, coming and ging as she pleased, going out after we had gone to bed,trashing her room, taking money, not going to school. We tried to be really tough but with a disrespectful boyfriend in tow it was really hard.

We are much tougher with Dd2, she gets no money or phone top ups unless her room is tidy and to do her own washing, she is still gobby and tries it on but things are much better than they were with Dd1.

Moosgal · 11/11/2010 12:12

Oh the joys of parenthood, I remember feeling so smug when my teens were younger and everyone was commenting how well behaved they were...that's all changed believe me!! I'm seriously struggling with my youngest at the moment and the only advice I can give you is keep at it, no matter if it seems that you are not being listened to and are fighting a losing battle I'm sure one day you will be rewarded for all your hard wrok...at least thats what I keep telling myself!! Good luck xxx

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