Pushing their luck

[mum2themasses]

I have 4 children, oldest 17 and youngest 7. My DS who is 15 has become very mouthy lately, thats fine I can cope with that. My problem is that I found a stash of clothes he stole from a department store, unworn, but tags removed.
Having 4 kids and bills etc make things tightbudget wise. they dont always get what they think they want, sometimes what is needed urgently is more important.
He said it was because he wanted new (label) clothes for camp. We had just spent a small fortune on new ( sale items and primark)clothes and camping gear for them.
Anyway long story short.
I made him come to the shop to return them with me. I told him it was up to them if they wanted to call the police or not.
Was this the right thing to do.??

Yes it was.
My friend's dd (14) has been doing the same, and she marched her back to the store. The store have banned her, and her friend. No police involved, but it has shaken them up so much, although the other girl's mother is a bit more "well we all did it when we were young".
You have been very strong, and hopefully have given him the shock of his life. A criminal record will affect his education/work choices.

You were right. It was a very brave thing for you to do and I hope your DS will learn from this experience.

I was hoping the store manager might say something, or even Ban him from the store, but he was shocked and didnt know what to do. I guess they dont often get parents returning stolen property.
I keep thinking where have I gone wrong here. I have alway told them stealing is illegal , whether it is a lolly pop or a top. In my mind it was one of those things "other "peoples kids did, not mine.

It was brave as well as right. You set a moral example. I know really good adults who shoplifted when they were younger, including a cousin of mine who is now a Professor of Cardiology. He is testing you, testing boundaries and with your fine example - he will grow out of it....

I applaud you in what you did, as has already been said it was the right thing to do and a moral example. My parents were very clear on these issues and always said they would inform the police if we crossed the line and that was enough! You have likely nipped this in the bud, your DS will hopefully reflect on his lucky escape thanks to his mum, plently of examples of young people with no useful role models, well done.