Periods

[valleyqueen]

My dd is off on holiday with my mum for 3 weeks, she is 11 and I have a feeling she is going to start her periods soon. The signs are there and most women in my family start at around this age (I was 10).

Dd and I discussed this and thought it would be agood idea to buy a few bits just in case,here is my problem. She is insistant that she wants to use tampons not towels she says she finds the idea horrible and it would be like wearing a dirty nappy. I know what she means I hate them. I have brought her a box of the super light lilets without an applicator. Now a friend has said she doesnt think they should be used for the first few years.

Could anyone let me know if this is right or not, I think I used them after about a year or so.

She can use them as soon as she feels ready to.

Why not just buy one more box, this time applicator ones. Then she's got the choice. Sorted!

Or were you asking whether tampons AT ALL should be used, as opposed to specifically non applicator ones? In that case, no, there's no intrinsic reason why a girl SHOULDN'T use tampons... it's just that most aren't confident enough at that age... that's all.

It sounds like your friend has heard and believed one of the old wives tales about tampons - 'shouldn't be used by virgins', 'only for married women' etc.

Of course your DD can use them from the start, as long as they are the smallest kind - periods can be quite light at first and I think there's increased risk of toxic shock syndrome with using tampons that are too absorbent(?).

You might want to show her how to use the two different sorts (with or without applicator) - just don't do what my friend's mum did and actually demonstrate insertion. My poor friend was mortified!!

With DD1 we sorted a small bag with tampons and pads so that she could carry it in her school bag. Started this when she was in year six so that she could get used to the idea.

Today I have just bought a little bag for DD2 (she will be going into year 6 in September). We have had a few chats and also DD1 has passed on her 'growing up' books.

I dont think there is anything wrong with using tampons from the start so long as she is confidant and knows about changing them regularly and not forgetting the last one.

Thanks for all your advice. Dd decided she wanted non applicator ones, she has seen me use the applicator ones it was the only way I could explain how to use them easily.

My friend just thinks it's wierd for a child to use them I am not sure about her reasoning.

I would get her a pack of towels as well, just in case she really struggles with tampons.

And she needs to practise inserting tampons before she actually needs to use them. I seem to remember it was quite tricky and painful at first.

I have brought her some pads to just in case. She is still insistant she won't use them but we will see .

Hi VQ, just a thought but I would suggest opening the pack and taking one or two out. That way your DD can use them if she wants to but wont be 'losing face' as you wont know (but you will of course!).

Does your mum know it's a possibility? But ask DD's permission first to tell her in case she doesn't want her to know.

My friend used tampons from the off- but I do think girls need to be aware and vigilant over changing them as its easy to forget and forgetting to change a pad doesn't matter so much. I would also recommend using pads at night as teenage girls rarely sleep less than 8 hours! Perhaps you could suggest she dry runs an ultra thin pad for a couple of hours so she can feel its not like a nappy?

I remember struggling with non-applicator tampons and found applicator ones easier as the smooth applicator was easier to insert than something that's super absorbant from the outset and can thus feel too difficult to insert.

Also, my first period was reasonable and from then, aged 13 to 19 when I went on the pill, the first 2 days were really really heavy and painful and I needed special nighttime pads and, if using tampons, would need more absorbancy than the mini variety. Also, for the bit of periods when its dead light but would still stain knickers, tampons aren't recommended, so perhaps she'll still need panty liners also.

No good reasoning about it being "strange" for a child to use them.A period is a period whether you are still a child or a grown up woman. I used them pretty much from the outset but put a pad in too on a heavier day just in case, esp at school when you can't always get to the loo when you feel the need. i never got on with the applicator types though. Now they are plasticky you rely on a bin being at hand too as the pesky tubes don't flush.

I remember my mum gave me stuff to put in my school bag which also included a spare pare of pants just in case.

Apparently practising before isn't recommended with tampons. I was teaching pshe in school in summer with a video from tampax which said you should not use them unless you are on your period. Agree it takes time to get used to though! Both methods probably needed in the first few months.

If your daughter doesn't want to use applicator tampons tell her to pop a little Vaseline on the end of a normal tampon as it will help her to insert it, otherwise it can be painful.

Also make sure she knows that she really needs to push it in as far as she can as when I first used them I thought they were really uncomfortable until I figured out that that was because I wasn't pushing them in far enough.

Good luck.