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I miss being high

84 replies

ChangedmyMindNotUsingMyRealName · 12/10/2024 16:36

That's all. It made me better at everything.

OP posts:
user1471453601 · 12/10/2024 20:27

This is all a bit strange to me. Following major surgery I took dihydrocodiene for six months. I stopped taking them because I was going to a country for four weeks where codeine was forbidden. I had zero side affects.

That's not to say I don't believe the opening poster, or that they may be addicted to this drug. Of course I believe her. But I would hated someone who needs this drug for pain relief not to take it. Consult your doctor. I did because if read of addiction issues. My doctor reassured me.

ChangedmyMindNotUsingMyRealName · 12/10/2024 20:31

@user1471453601 I don't believe I'm truly addicted to it. I think I've just been taking too much and reckless with it the last few days and got in a bit of a mess and I'm withdrawing from that. I've a feeling it will pass soon. Like it can happen coming down off one dose of cocaine for example

OP posts:
Scutterbug · 12/10/2024 20:40

You could always call 111 and chat with a medic to get some advice?

Ilovelurchers · 12/10/2024 20:41

Well, the CBT work I was suggesting whole help whether or not you are addicted - the point is, you are abusing substances in a way you find problematic - you are experiencing urges to keep using, which you are finding it hard to fight.....

So it would be good for you to be stronger in identifying your triggers (what makes you want to use) more clearly, how to avoid those triggers, how to ride cravings out. So my recommendation of the handbook I suggested earlier still stands......

Moreover, you don't overall sound like you in the healthiest, happiest place in your life. We all need a bit of help sometimes to get to that point.

Well done for starting this thread - even though your phrasing was unusual (!) starting the conversation and admitting to what has been happening was a brave thing to do.

andromaque · 12/10/2024 21:10

Don't blame yourself, OP. Opioids (and alcohol, for that matter) change the dopamine levels in your brain (dopamine is what causes a feeling of pleasure). That's how people become addicted. But the problem is that if you continue using, you gradually need to take more and more of the drug to achieve the same level of pleasure (because the brain adapts and becomes desensitised to dopamine).

Once you quit, it's normal to go through a transition stage where you feel like you're not getting pleasure from anything. Your brain has become accustomed to getting all its dopamine from the drug, and everything else is less effective at making you feel happy. But if you stick it out, your brain's neuropathways will gradually return to normal, and you will start to be able to feel happiness and take pleasure in other things again.

That's not the most scientific wording, but I've read a lot of literature about addiction (have detoxed and relapsed a few times in my recovery journey), and that's roughly the way it works.

Do hang in there! You might see if there are NA (narcotics anonymous) meetings in your area; they helped me. Or online meetings. Or SMART as someone above suggested. Just look for some source of outside support; it's very hard to detox and recover on your own. It's very helpful to be able to talk to other people who have been through the same thing.

Hang in there and it will get better! And be kind to yourself. None of us ever chooses to become an addict. It creeps up on you and you don't realise how dependent you are till you try to stop. But you can do this!💐

ChangedmyMindNotUsingMyRealName · 13/10/2024 02:38

Thanks. the cravings are coming and going. But I don't feel a mess anymore. I'm trying to translate what you said about dopamine to myself. I take a med that blocks it's reuptake, and I went off it the week I went off on this little "expedition" I'm gonna call it

Thinking about it, on the meds, everything is blunted, so there's no major stress or upset most of the time, but I think I've been depressed without realising it for a while

OP posts:
ChangedmyMindNotUsingMyRealName · 13/10/2024 09:08

Update

I cracked. The withdrawals got too much. Now I've nothing left and I'm scared. I'm going to go to the chemist and buy some co-codamol and take 50 mg later if I need it. Then I'm done with it forever.

OP posts:
HebeMumsnet · 13/10/2024 22:22

Hi there ChangedmyMind

We're glad to see you've had lots of support from other Mumsnetters here. In case you needed some additional support from professionals. This organisation might be able to help? Best of luck with your path forwards.

dorabora · 06/11/2024 14:09

ChangedmyMindNotUsingMyRealName · 13/10/2024 09:08

Update

I cracked. The withdrawals got too much. Now I've nothing left and I'm scared. I'm going to go to the chemist and buy some co-codamol and take 50 mg later if I need it. Then I'm done with it forever.

How're you doing op?

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