How do I go about discovering my style?

[Endlesslywondering]

I'm aged 60, recently retired & just realised I have completely lost my way when it comes to style. When I worked, I wore blazers, tops & mostly skinny jeans, with the odd smart dress thrown in. I'm a slightly overweight short waisted apple 5ft 4 & still cannot find a fashionable jeans style which suits me or fits properly. Wide trousers seem to only make my middle look wider. My bust has expanded alarmingly post meno which I'm not happy about either! My wardrobe is very dated & tbh most of it probably needs to go.

In my fantasy world, I am stylish & modern but honestly have no idea where to start! I've lived in shorts & t shirts all sumner and fear I may slouch into leggings and hoodies for the entire winter unless I take action.

Help style me please!

Well, you can wear leggings (or jogging pants) and a hoodie all winter if you want. This set would look very cool with grey wool socks and pointy mules and a good macintosh / trench coat / parka for any ordinary day that doesn’t require brogues or boots.

https://communityclothing.co.uk/collections/womens-loungewear/products/womens-hooded-sweatshirt-navy

https://communityclothing.co.uk/collections/womens-loungewear/products/womens-sweatpants-navy

If your natural inclination is towards athleisure (?) why not lean into that? It’s a very easy way to look stylish and modern at any price point from Uniqlo to Wales Bonner.

FWIW I am of a similar age and height (though of different proportions) and honestly couldn’t tell you what ‘my style’ is. (My AI correspondent has settled on ‘luxury scarecrow’.)

One thing - if you haven’t bought clothes for leisure for a while you may be surprised by the increased cost of decent quality items. If you can say how much you anticipate spending, people will be able to offer more accurate suggestions, either new or pre-owned.

Thanks for thoughts so far. I don't mind spending more for quality items but they have to be practical & not require dry cleaning! I'm leaning into less items but better quality. Athleisure for day to day is fine but I'd also need smart casual for evenings, concerts etc. I'm hoping to lose a bit of weight but it's really hard!!

I see things I like but when I get into changing rooms the result is less than flattering

Do you not shop online? I’d never buy anything if I were still relying on shop cubicle mirrors. (Besides which I like the unlimited options internet shopping affords.)

I suppose it depends whether you want a journey of discovery embracing absolutely every available source - or to be told what to buy at M&S …

I've found experimenting with jean shapes can help you decide what's flattering - and if the fit is right then it's actually surprising how flattering different shapes can be. I'm only slightly taller than you, but provided the jeans give me a waist then I prefer wide leg, barrell, mom, or flared jeans. I team these with good quality leather belts. I find skinny jeans a bit restrictive around the knees these days! If you want an evening look then I would suggest velvet trousers or jeans accessorised with your favourite tops/sweaters, or of course if you're into dresses then there's so many out there to choose from.

I favour cashmere or merino wool jumpers and short cardigans sometimes paired with silk blouses or decent quality t shirts to go with jeans or trousers.

I still wear quite a lot of various type blazers and jackets in the winter - mainly tweed, wool, leather or suede. With leather or suede trainers it's easy to pull lots of different looks together. I find them more comfortable than boots these days.

I don't wear many dresses usually, although this summer with the heatwave I've found them useful. While they're not Toast ones, this is the look I've gone for as they're loose and comfortable. Also plain cotton shirt dresses.

Winter coats can look good in plain coloured wool fabric, my favourite is an Italian black and white herringbone wool tweed longish coat which goes with everything.

Like you, I moved from a professional environment to retirement and it took time to find my style - but I'm happy with my choices these days.

Have fun experimenting - you've now got the time - try on lots of different styles and find your new look - enjoy.

Some people have an eye of this kind of thing. I’m much more comfortable with a spreadsheet so invested in ‘external consultancy’ and now know the kind of shapes and colours that will work for me. Takes all the pain out of shopping and I look pulled together even when I haven’t made any effort. There are loads of people providing this kind of service. I went with a personal recommendation and really find it useful.

https://www.kerrieellis.co.uk/

How about going on Pinterest and making one board. Then search for ‘outfits’ or whatever, and very quickly add things you like but without thinking too much, just do it quickly. Then after a while look back at what you’ve added and you might find that you do instinctively always go for bright colours and wafty fabrics, or whatever else - you’ll see the commonalities.