Mid 30s style advice

[ToddlersAreBananas]

I'm desperately unstylish atm - and need help: I wear my decade old skinnies and hubbies baggy t shirts . I'm 5"5' and a size 12

I don't like synthetic clothes very much or tracksuit outfits.

1. If you're mid thirties, and feel well put together, where do you shop and what do you like to wear?

1. If you're not mid 30s, or if you're unstylish, what do you think would look nice?

Perhaps start with upgrading your jeans and t-shirts. Go and try on barrel leg, wide leg and straight leg ones in a medium denim and see which ones you like best. With this style of jeans you will need a more fitted t-shirt, so perhaps buy a couple in your favourite colours.
Instagram is good for inspiration, I’m not sure if Lydia Tomlinson or Cocobeautea would be your thing?

I’m in the same boat drab as anything. I have baggy jeans and bershka fitted T-shirts. I could do with some smart trainers though.

I'm a similar height and weight to you, I'm 38, 5'6 and a size 12.

I buy a LOT of my clothes from Uniqlo as I find them comfortable but well cut. They're great for the basics. I tend to be a size Medium in there.

For jeans I will only buy wide leg or straight leg. I find them tricky so I went into TKMaxx one day and just tried loads and loads of them on until I found a few pairs that were comfortable and look good.

I watched a lot of "styling basics" videos on Insta and it has helped. Just simple things like wearing jewellery, rolling up sleeves, slightly tucking t shirts etc can make the same outfit look so much better. I wear a lot of Milly Grace jewellery so that I can sleep and shower in it so there's no effort. I just wear the same earrings, bracelet and necklace for a week and then swap them round.

How would you like to dress, @ToddlersAreBananas? And what are you dressing for? Work, social life, soft play? Do you want to shop pre-owned, or High St, or ???

Are you most inclined towards:

Athleisure:
Varley

Cute frocks:
https://palava.co/

Mainstream fashion:
https://www.stories.com/en-gb/

Slinky date wear:
https://uk.realisationpar.com/

The rural ideal:
Carrier Company

They’re all equally valid choices amongst a million others - and no one has to stick to one style. But if you can describe your lifestyle, and what you want your wardrobe to achieve, it will be easier for people to make helpful suggestions.

Great advice to start with some good jeans!
I’m not a fan of White Stuff in general but they do have a really good range of denim and offer free denim styling sessions. I’d advise to work out which denim shapes suit you then look on Pinterest for what tops and shoes work with that jeans shape and see what you like.

@Princessfluffy I find White Stuff an odd one really because I agree in general I'm not a fan of most of their clothes and particularly their patterns but for basics they are really good. Their Twister chinos for example are very flattering and the Nelly t shirts in plain colours are my go-to t shirt as they're 100% cotton.

I agree their denim is good too!

Start by thinking about how you’d like to dress. If you enjoy t-shirts and skinnies but want to look more updated try a different style of jeans to start with.

Actually - Varley seems to be mostly synthetics, so it’s a bad example of the type of athleisure brand you might consider! But you could definitely look active and well put together and up to date without going near a track suit.

Oh wow, thank you all so much! This is already so useful!
@minnowonthesay @Princessfluffy @TealReader you're soo right! I do need to try different styles of loose fit jeans - I wonder if going in store would be the easiest way to do this?... perhaps on a day when I don't have the toddler in tow 😅...

Do you have any suggestions of in-store shops to try? Are M&S or Next any good?? (though I associate both with 70 year olds... I used to get all mine skinnies from New Look back in the day...)

@orangegato what brand are most of your jeans?

@Princessfluffy @GameOfJones odd that you should mention White Stuff. I realised just yesterday that a couple of the hand-me down tops from my sis that I actually really like on, and that look good, are white stuff.

(I think they're hand me downs, though I'm not 100% sure she knows I've still got them 🤐)

@BattleHimForARepublic honestly, I think that this is probably the issue. I don't know what I want. I've got a 3 month old (ish) baby, and I think I've lost my sense of identity between having my two children. I used to have clothes for specific purposes - for running, for work, and for chilling. Now, I'm essentially on 'chill' mode for the year, but want to feel better and look nicer. So I suppose I want smart chill clothes. But I'm trying to get out with the children and do loads of walking, gardening etc, so they can't be too starched / restrictive.

And as for dresses, I look like Ms Trunchbull in a dress... can anyone empathise with this?

@GameOfJones I like the look of uliquo clothes and the idea of pernament jewellery is great! Anything with less faff is great!

With jeans you need to try a lot of pairs on so I would definitely recommend in person shopping. White stuff have a good range, I’m sure M&S do too. Levi’s would be worth a go if you are near one or John Lewis? I’d ask for advice from the staff so they can do the running around of finding and suggesting different sizes and styles!
Once you know what style you prefer you can have a more targeted approach and go to other shops, you don’t necessarily need to buy from the shop where you work out what styles suit you.
I suit midrise wide legs and barrel legs - pay attention to what rise works best for you as well as what leg shape.

@ToddlersAreBananas I’ve got some Zara wide leg ones low waist and Primark high waisted grey wide leg. I love them both a lot!
Just in the last hour ordered myself some brown Spezials with cow print because I felt inspired.

I find jackets hard work to find that go with outfits that include jeans so usually wing it with a jumper. Long coats look silly on me as I’m 5 feet tall.

My daughters are mid thirties, we all buy our jeans at M & S, they have every style, in various colours and usually a few lengths.
Top Shop and Uniqlo seem to be what they and their friends are wearing at the moment.
On the subject of jackets, particularly the bubble hem and funnel necked variety, one has the Arket denim jacket at £95, an@other has the F & F same style jacket at £29.50

@Princessfluffy good idea to consider rise as I'm never sure on the difference between mid and high rise

@orangegato love the idea of grey wide legs - might see if primark still has them.
(had to google what speziels are)

@minnowonthesay - I love all these ideas, thank you!

Mid rise is where the waistband sits between hip level and bellybutton level. Highrise is where the waistband sits at bellybutton height or above.

I felt very lost in my style after having kids. I spent a bit of time thinking about how I wanted clothes to work for me. I found things like Instagram and Pinterest very overwhelming as lots of people looked great in things that I just knew would be too much of a faff for me! If you don’t like dresses start with trousers. A pair of jeans and some trousers that can be dressed up and down. I really like Uniqlo jersey barrel trousers. Great value. I’m a size 12 and the M is a nice loose fit. I love shirts but more relaxed ones rather than stiff. So I bought some great shirts- Uniqlo again have good ones. Splashed out on some pricier ones too- Essentiel Antwerp, Joseph, with nothing underneath. I also love knitwear and t shirts so have bought some nice pieces- but with a 3 month old and a toddler I’d be looking for washable knitwear! A blazer over jeans and t shirt can really smarten the look up. But that’s just what works for me- you need to think about what works for you. Vinted is a great way to try out things!