I don’t wear any…….

[LaurieFairyCake]

1. Black. Ever. Feel like I’ve time travelled to being a waitress 40 years ago, which I hated.

1. Cold shoulder or no shoulder tops. My frame is tiny, literally 13 inches across the shoulder - still look like a shot putter.

1. Co - ords. Fabulous on everyone else, pyjamas on me.

1. Shorts. Tried every style but basically my legs are the least attractive part of my body so every time I put shorts on I see too much leg and feel self conscious.

1. Knee length dresses. Same reason as shorts, cankles, wobbly calves. Yeurgh.

1. Polyester. Unless there’s some in the gym leggings and I only wear them for an hour. It’s just too warm in London for poly.

you ? (Excuse numbering, on stupid phone if you put in spaces it then gets rid of numbers 🤦‍♀️)

Maroon, taupe and 'muddy' colours
Barrel leg jeans. They give everyone bowlegged 'cowboy' vibes.
Crop leg, except for gym leggings
Scarlet red hair
Padded bra

Normal jeans(occasionally wear jeggings)
Wide leg trousers
V neck or low cut tops
Oversized tops
Shirts
Shift dresses
Mini skirts
Jumpsuits
Most shorts

Basically anything that makes me look even more out of proprotion. Plus anything mostly white, it looks dirty far to quickly.

I don’t wear:

Orange, mustard, cream, tomato red
Heels
Anything with a fitted waistband
Dresses with a tie belt (sack of spuds)
Crew or high necks (choke me)
Eye make up (always wear light foundation and lipstick if going out but I tend to rub my eyes)
Underwired bras
Jumpsuits (weak bladder!)

Some of the things that other people are wary of such as showing untoned arms or pale legs with veins, fat knees etc would have been a no-no for me a few years back but I CBA now. If it’s hot I’ll be wearing shorts and a vest top and if you don’t like the look of me, then look the other way.

Crop tops. Every top around at the moment is crop on me, waiting for fashion to move away from barrel jeans (rickets chic) and short tops. It's hideous.

Heels. Am already 5'8" and they make me too tall, plus I waddle like a duck in heels, not attractive.

Hate polo necks, button blouses as they just feel like am a granny. Trainers. I want the comfort of trainers but hate the look.

With you on co-ords looking like pyjamas, in fact I've got nicer pyjamas.
Anything yellow, makes me look jaundiced
What used to called bodies, not sure what they're called now. Never long enough and the poppers trap fanny hair.
Heels. I'm tall anyway and well past being crippled for fashion.
Jewellery apart from a watch and earrings.

Trousers that aren’t jeans.

Skirts.

Cold shoulder tops! Hate them. So stupid.

I also never wear sleeveless knitwear, seems impractical.

Orange. And related shades of terracotta, peach etc. Makes me look dead.

Nail art. Like it on other people. Just not on me. Same for nail extensions.

Filler/Botox. I appear to be an outlier where I live. I don't need Botox (yet). Filler lips just look weird to me.

Suits and blazers. I always look like a prison officer.

Polo necks. Have large bust. No further comment needed.

Same list as you op, apart from something off my shoulders. (I don’t normally do this though as it would involve strapless bras which are annoying).
I never wear pointy toed shoes as they don’t work with my wide feet, ditto ballet flats.
I never wear sports clothes as day wear.
I never wear tie dye, animal print, or anything with a tropical themed print. I am too pale for tropical florals.
I don’t wear nail varnish on my fingernails, only on toes.
I never wear thong knickers. I tried, decades ago, but ughhhh no. I hated the feel of them.
I don’t wear cobalt blue or fuchsia pink. I like these to look at, I actually love that intense deep Indian pink, but they look terrible on me.

I don't wear

Black - look like a delegate at a vampire conference if I do

Polka dots - just screams grandma to me

Heels - nope, comfort is king, likewise ballet flats (they are so hard to keep on!)

Cold shoulder tops - they all just look cheap and nasty

Lilac - grandma vibes

Red and grey together - school memories

Black with a bright colour - just gives 80s vibes and looks dated to me. Black trousers with grey is ok

Collection bracelets like nomination and Pandora. I'm amazed at how much they cost and I'd rather buy some second hand gold jewellery

I'm also not really a fan of logos and things that already look faded (looking at you Seasalt).

I only wear sleeveless things in the gym

I try to avoid man made fabrics but it's so hard

I also won't now buy cheap bags. I've spent about £120 on vinted in the last year buying some second hand good quality leather bags and, having seen what you can get second hand, I'm not buying cheap pleather any more

Fake leather - always looks cheap, feels sweaty and falls apart.
Sportswear/walking gear in 'womens' colours - you know when its a perfectly good fleece, walking shoe or rain jacket but they have added purple or pink elements to feminise it...so annoying.
Dungarees - these just always look horrible on anyone. Extremely impractical too.

All of the colours you dont wear are also foods @Shinyhappyapple!!!

Barrel jeans …. What on earth

Love this thread

mine are:

heels - I like comfort, I don’t mind a wedge but that’s as far as I go

jumpsuits / playsuits - I have a long body so everything crawls right up where it shouldn’t

turtle or polo necks - I’m too hot

old lady wear - fat face, white stuff, sea salt etc

Patterns of any sort (including spots and stripes). Tops and bottoms have to be plain

Socks. They’re the most incomparable thing in the world.

Floaty style of any sort.

Black, flat shoes.

Anything “pretty” no embellishments or frou-frou bits.

Un-matched underwear. Knickers and bra are always the same colour (nude, white, black or navy).

Leggings

This is a good thread because it reminds you that other people have style/body issues too and probably really dont care what you look like! But to join in:

Shorts/short skirts - basically my legs are lumps of blancmange that nobody needs to see
Anything backless or with a deep back
Anything off the shoulder. I like the look but cannot find a strapless bra to hold up these babies
Olive green. I really like the colour but it doesnt like me
Heels - love them but cant walk in them at all.
Ballet flats - hate them. Don’t think they suit many people
Carrot/parsnip/barrel jeans - basically anything with a silly name
Dungarees and jumpsuits - my bum really does look big in these ( cos it is!)

Calling out brands for being “old lady wear” is not really in the lighthearted spirit of the thread.

I don’t wear-

Jeans
Heels
Jewellery (except wedding ring)
Make up
Shirts or blouses
Smart clothes of any sort really
Pastel colours
Strapless anything

I am most often found in gym kit or leggings/shorts with a vest/hoodie. Comfort is king!

Polo necks or drop waists.
Man made fibres.
Crocs. Shudder
Not a fan of polka dots, or stripes.

Make up
Crew/high necks
Heels and/or pointy shoes - feet are like shovels
Yellow, orange or pink clothes make me look jaundiced and close to death
Fussy sleeves - puffy, floaty or frilly
White - too messy and attract stains plus I've been mistaken for staff
Ok with florals or stripes but anything geometric or abstract always looks weird.
Hats also look strange which is a shame because I like hats.

I don't wear any....

• clothes that cling to my stomach/accentuate my stomach
• skirts
• scarves other than ones to keep you warm when outside
• dungarees

I don't wear:

Strapless tops or dresses - small boobs and small slopey shoulders mean I just can't feel comfortable they'll stay on

Tops or dresses that gather at the bust and then flare - I always look pregnant in them

Beige/camel/cream - maybe occasionally had shorts in those colours, but I feel so boring in neutrals

High fashion - I'm interested in trends but following them seems far too expensive, time consuming and stressful

Cropped tops - always had a bit of a belly but could still just about get away with it pre kids - not after though! Never wore anything with cut-outs around the waist front, was always too 'lumpy' for that.

Bikinis - again, pre kids could just about get away with a triangle. Now there is not a shape on earth that works on me. People say 'Oh, get big knickers, get a tankini' but they only serve to emphasise how much stomach I have and how little boobage. I look like a sack of spuds in all one-pieces as well, but I have just accepted that, I'm not trying to look attractive when swimming anyhow.

Belts as a 'feature' - sometimes to hold trousers up, but I am not going to draw attention to my non existent waist.

I am very happy with my body - I have good legs, I just know what won't look so good if I draw attention to it.

Boob tube tops. It’s always the person they suit the least, that wears them. Why?

No indeed, the usual ageist nonsense.