Struggling to find bras that fit after major weight loss and feel so defeated.

[Aiborlie]

I am just so fed up.
I have lost over 100lbs and maintained for 2 years now.
I always thought my belly would bother me but I don't really care much aboutnit but my boobs distress me so much.

At my biggest I had huge boobs. I've breastfed 3 times too.

I am now 8stone 10lbs and my boobs are very sagged.

I went to M&S months ago and they fitted me at a 34DD and I bought some full cup bras. I tried on some 'nice' bras but non of them fit at all.

My breasts are long and flat so I can't get any lift or illusion of cleavage even though there is a decent amount of tissue.

So M&S put me at 34 DD.

Those bras just have a massive gap in them but I think me and the fitter were just fed up by that point so I bought them and they look OK under tshirts.

So last night I did the home measurements things and came out at a 32C/D

My 18yo daughter is a 32D so I asked if I could try one of her bras on (a primark cheapie) and I was just hanging over the cup , like 50% out.

So went to John Lewis today. Told her I had on the M&S 34DD and she measured me at 31inches under the bust.
Agreed there was a lot of gape in the cup and suggested I try 32D.

Got about 4 styles and non of them fit.
Band was too tight and hanging out of all cups. No lift.

So she says to try either a 32DD or a 34D.
The 32DD just left me looking saggy AF with like a weird double boob. And the 34 D fit a bit better in one style and the other 4 I tried on didn't fit.

I spill out under the band, under my armpits.
My breasts are wide, long and flat. They dont stay in the middle like they're supposed to.

Once again woman looked baffled and didn't really help.

I can't have sex anymore with my bra off so I just wanted some sexy bras to give me some lift and support and help me feel good and I come away with a single nude coloured full cup bra that wouldn't look out of place in Bon Marche.

I cried in the changing room. I cried when I got home.

I am so upset and angry that I should feel great about myself after losing so much weight and all I feel is embarrassment and I am MORE self conscious now about my body than when I was 100lbs bigger.

I'm only 40years old and I cannot enjoy sex at all because all I can think about is how my breasts are either lying flat as a pancake or hanging down like tennis balls in socks. My husband tries to touch them and I recoil. Its so embarrassing having him trying to scoop down to the bottom of my bra to try and find my nipple :(

Please don't suggest surgery. I would have it tomorrow if I could afford it but I cannot. It's not an option at all financially, if it was I would have had it done already.

This was me. I asked for a Rigby and Peller voucher for my birthday and the service was incredible. I was originally measured as a 38DD and R&P said I was a 34G. I bought two bras from them and then bought 5 from M&S in that size which fit perfectly. Highly recommend as they spend time working through all the different bra shapes and what you might want/need.

Lovely news! I’m so glad you’ve found a good fitter and have some bras that work. It makes such a difference.

I have lost 7 stone and my boobs are the same no volume at all and look like spaniel ears 😂 but in clothes they look fine. I wear a 32G you wouldn’t think I’m a G cup but that’s what fits and looks good. You also wouldn’t think I’m a 32 back but that’s what fits although some styles I am a 34 I just go up cup sizes until it’s a good fit.
Im not sure why they’re trying to fit you into D cups if they are too small. Go up cup sizes in the 32 bands to see if they fit better. If the band is too tight but the cups fit ok try the 34 bands but go down cup sizes.
Some bras just don’t fit or suit, I can only wear certain bras and I make sure all fat/tissue from my sides and armpits are in the bra so the cup needs to be big enough for that. I also like to wear the lightly padded all round t shirt bras to give nice shape and illusion of a bit more volume

Try Bella Rosa lingerie fitting, she does it online for £20. She is amazing.
I was wearing 36C and I was like 30EE!

The only bras I rate at Marks and Spencer are the Body Soft tshirt bras and the Rosie silk and lace.

Bella Rosa Lingerie also does a catalogue. Freya Loveland, Carey Parfait, Gossard Encore, Pour Moi Rebel Plunge, Pour Moi Amour, Gossard Super Boost lace would all work for a small of boob like me.
Maybe try two band sizes.

Bodies with under poppers are also good. I have the Pour Moi Romance body.

I am another one recommending bravissimo. I lost weight and lost a lot from the top of my boobs. They fitted me with a bra that fits great. Before weight loss I hadn’t been measured in years and was wearing a 40d I’m now wearing a 32g and feel great.

That's fantastic, I'm so pleased for you!

My top tip now is to take note not only of the brand and size of th ebra, but the style type. my breasts like to escape to the side so I've learnt that looking at any bra that doesn't have a some sort of inward push to them is pointless. Balcony bras can sometimes work and I generally go for ones that have reinforcement on the outside. Knowing tha thelps me choose new bras when I'm just browsing.

I was scrolling through the replies to find someone mentioning these

Ive lost 5 stone myself and these give me an incredible shape

No back fat either

Give them a go

I lost a shit load of weight and my tits went long and flat, i had to roll them up! Destroyed my confidence. I've since regained half a stone and they've filled out nicely, not sure if this is an option for you, OP?

I would actually not mind gaining a little but unfortunately the first place I regain is my stomach. Not my face (perhaps a little gaunt) or my boobs.
At around 10st I was happy with the reat of my body but still had a fat little belly, looking 4 months pregnant and was in a size 12/14 trousers! (Again the skin was a big factor)

So loosing another 16ish lbs gave me a much flatter stomach.

If i could choose where the weight went I would regain some!

I am 50 and have swimmers shoulders. I noticed quite a few older ladies in both stores. I was so pleased with the one I bought I went bzck and bought it again. I live rurally & our closest town only really has M&S or Sainsburys. I do not understand why people rate their underwear. In all my years I have only had one bra I loved from M&S weirdly it was DD cup. I dont have big boob's. Well done on the weight loss OP. You must feel so much better and healthier. Enjoy your new bra

So are these jelly bras a sort of padded sports bra?

OP, this was me after 5 stone loss on MJ. My previous 34HH boobies were just flat and gross.

I was in an independent bra shop in Ireland and got this Freya Rebecca bra. Because it is padded it gives your boob shape. So you boob is till sitting more down in the cup but it looks like you have normal shoes boobs. Such a comfy everyday bra. I have loads of them and a strapless one that is comfy too. First time I was ever able to wear strapless anything. I’m a 28/30FF now.
I agree it knocks your confidence and you look so bad after all the weigh loss with no clothes on-look great fully dressed. But I’m a year after my goal now and my body has tightened up and looks much better now. I’d never go back.
https://www.bravissimo.com/products/rebecca-essentials-bra-fa290#beige-fa290bge www.bravissimo.com/products/rebecca-essentials-bra-fa290/#beige-fa290bge]]]]

I will never learn to proof read

Hi @Aiborlie can I ask what style of bra you went for as I have a similar sounding boob shape after weight loss? Thanks.

An independent lingerie shop is the place to go. The more old-fashioned looking, possible dusty and ill-lit, the better. One with a grey-haired lady of a certain age who has been fitting bras for decades and pays no attention to standard measurements. The kind of professional who won’t let you out of the shop until you’re both happy. Google shops in your area. I went from 36DD to 34E after visiting such a shop - never looked back.

Think so, a teeny shop near the Octagon theatre.

That’s amazing!!!! She’s ace and well worth getting bras from.
I’m so chuffed it went well for you. Happy glorious bosoms! 😂♥️

She is lovely. I actually cried.

I since bought another 2 bras from gossard and bloody hell, I have cleavage again!!

I was a bit taken aback because in all fittings I've ever had they have been bra on but ai explained about my weightloss and that I am very saggy and she said 'you dont mind if I have a look?' and whipped my bra off 😅😅

I NEVER standbin front of a mirror with my boobs out. I don't even let my husband see my boobs so it was quite the shock to my system (especially whenn she showed me the best way to put the bra on which involves bending over and 'plopping' your breasts into the cup whilst holding the band as high up under them as possible) which meant looking at my breasts hanging down in a way that normally would have made me cry!

But she was so positive about things and the fact Id lost weight and fed 4 kids.

She really gave me a sense of confidence, to the point that when I went home and showed my husband my bra I actually took it off and stood in front of him bare breasted and said 'look at my boobs' 🤣 (i always tell him to look away whilst i change :( )

I have regained some confidence so am really grateful to her and the suggestion to go see her.

That is a lovely, positive post. Really glad you're feeling happier

Congratulations on weight loss I am very similar

Lost seven stone and also lost my beautiful boobs

They are now empty sacks of skin And I totally understand the meaning Is of spaniel ears

Lower the number under the boobs seems higher the letters are so I am around a 30 D now sometimes E

I have also started wearing padded bras which is comical to me and I had such lovely boobs before

Sadly, boobs are just fat. I would love a boob up. I can’t afford one.

I now have wireless bras and underwired don’t seem to fit that well

Have you tried a balcony bra ? I think they give the support of a full cup bra without being full cup and are a bit sexier.

One of the great things about old-fashioned independant bra fitters is that they have seen thousands of women's boobs au naturelle and so know what boobs actually look like. The rest of us have a distorted, airbrushed idea of what boobs "should" look like from adverts, celebs, porn, etc.

she showed me the best way to put the bra on which involves bending over and 'plopping' your breasts into the cup

The "bend, lift, and scoop" technique should be taught at school.

when I went home and showed my husband my bra I actually took it off and stood in front of him bare breasted and said 'look at my boobs'

I have been poorly today and reading this has really cheered me up.

I am glad you found something that worked. I confess I had surgery last November to give me boobs back after weight loss and maintaining it for a year. I was left with nothing at all. I know you are all sorted now, but for anyone else reading - implants are very strange. Over 7 months on and they don’t feel like me. But I also had the recoil from being touched. I still do.