New York / Long Island wedding July mid 40s. Uk size 10. What to wear?

[incognitomummy]

That’s it really. I’ve been invited to a family wedding in NYC / Long Island this summer.

what should I wear?!

there are 3 days of events so I also need something to wear to the pre wedding dinner also in Long Islndand a post wedding party near Central Park.

help!

im a single mum, will have my kids with me teens / tweens, UK10, 5’3

any links would be helpful. Thx.

There is another similar thread running which might help you!

What kind of clothes do you like? Dresses? Sleeves? Maxi or mini? Etc!

Hello! I’ve lost a load of weight in the last year so I don’t really know what I like now.

I am a relative of the groom so I want to look polished and well turned out. I think this will mean a sleeve of some kind. Even if it is just capped. Or a strappy dress with a coat or jacket or removable cape for the ceremony.

I love both mini and maxi.
Have to be careful with maxi as I’m short - needs to be well balanced so I don’t look frumpy.

I don’t know how people dress for US weddings so I have “the fear” of turning up in the wrong outfit! Over or under dressed!!!

I love hats.
i love colour.

I love the Ascot and Wimbledon vibe of English summer.

I love English weddings.

I love dress coats.

If it was an English wedding then I might fancy some of the dresses with capes I’ve seen online!

my fatter “go to” outfit was a Paul Costello navy linen dress with cream polka dots and a Paul Costello linen plain navy tailored dress coat over it with a navy wide brimmed hat.

however there doesn’t appear to be a dress code so I’m flummoxed. (the bride is very glamorous, super fit and musical. I asked her about the dress code and she said people would turn up in anything from black tie to cocktail dress!!!!)

my DD is wearing a pale blue dress. So I could try to colour match / complement with her

there are 3 parties. So I need something for
a pre wedding dinner
the wedding itself
A rooftop party - something fun. Black? or bright?. Sparkly?

looking forward to the inspiration!!

Also need to get my 15yo handsome son an outfit…..

I have been to New York a few times! If when Iv been in the summer is anything to go by it will be sweltering so I would avoid anything such as a coat or jacket, or black!

Nobody’s Child Starlight dress I found this at John Lewis & Partners. What do you think?
https://www.johnlewis.com/nobodys-child-starlight-floral-seersucker-midi-dress-white-multi/p114872824?tmad=c&tmcampid=7&s_share=jlappios_Y29tLmFwcGxlLlVJS2l0LmFjdGl2aXR5Lk1haWw=

https://www.asos.com/sister-jane/sister-jane-puff-sleeve-ruffle-hem-mini-dress-in-black-bow-print/prd/209801457?_gl=1oddkf3_upMQ..gs*MQ..&gclid=EAIaIQobChMI0suf5fzqkwMVyIxQBh26GBVvEAAYASAAEgLpgvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds&gbraid=0AAAAADqFjOAfukJ1Y41Zf4Vi3UpDxPSI#colourWayId-209801469

Sadly hats are not a thing at US weddings ☹️

(Unless it's a "society" do)

What time is the wedding at? Many US weddings tend to be at five or possibly even 6 pm in the evening so a lot of guests wear fancier dresses than for a daytime event. Also, if the event is indoors (you don’t say) then you’re more likely to need a wrap! US air air-conditioning is fierce.

This is very good intel. Let me check the wedding website. I haven’t thought about time of day at all!!

US weddings can be a LOT dressier, the one I went to everyone was in evening dress!

So best to ask first.

This sounds like a fabulous wedding weekend, very exciting!

I went to an an east coast US wedding about 25 years and I was definitely the odd one out. I dressed like a UK wedding guest and I was the only one with a hat and day dress (I had to stash the hat in the corner of the venue in the end although our American friends did love it !).

All the other women were in glamorous cocktail dresses.

The internet has much more information now and you can probably find lots of photos from NYC weddings online.

As pp mentioned - it will be hot and sticky if outside in July … or cool from the AC if inside!

Anyway, the whole weekend sounds amazing and hope you have a wonderful time with your kids.

I agree with others: veer more towards evening wear for the wedding itself, and definitely no hat/fascinator etc. From what the bride said, I’d go for a midi/maxi cocktail dress.

Do not wear a hat, I turned up as the ONLY hat wearing guest at a wedding stateside, it was decades ago and everyone loved me for it but good grief they just don’t wear them, I have been to three wedding in America, zero hats or fascinators. The last was 2019 there was very much an evening and cocktail dress kind of a vibe going on and it was also a three day wedding.

I wore a cream skirt with a Silk blouse with blue butterflies printed round the edge and blue satin shoes to the rehearsal dinner. A teal evening dress with a kick pleat tail effect and a teal Chinese silk jacket to the main event, it was a mixed Chinese European wedding, with a formal tea ceremony which I took part in as an Auntie, I’m half Chinese. For the post wedding brunch I wore a very nice Brown and cream cotton Calvin Klein summer dress with a little cream jacket.

@GiveMeCoffeeandTV another only person in a hat guest I look back and laugh but at the time and as only a 22 year old it was a bit much. it was a huge cream picture hat that cost a fortune and was very much Four weddings and a funeral type hat. I had a massive hat box on the plane :).

The wedding I went to in around 2006 in Chicago had loads of guests from New York as groom was from there. Lots of the women wore black and they were the most elegant bunch ever. I wore a long plum coloured chiffon bias cut dress with small ruffled sleeves.

Be prepared for the possibility removal of the Brides garter by the groom with his teeth, well it happened at one wedding, not my relatives ones though. They all did that cake shoving in the face thing though.

Absolutely find out the time and dress code. Evening New York weddings can be black
tie or black tie optional, ie very dressy. Daytime ones less so. It’s always safe to ask.

@ViciousCurrentBun

Yes, snap! It is such a happy memory now and with hindsight, everyone probably loved my outfit as I looked very British. I was also young, slim and in my mid 20s so no doubt looked great!!

But I too had a hat box on the plane .. and I also remember getting out of the taxi at the wedding and feeling so embarrassed and panicked when I saw the other guests 😂 It was a great wedding though and everyone was lovely.

Haha I love the hat stories! Agree no one wears hats at US weddings defintely not New York ones.

agree about air con - can be ferocious in the US but also so hot and sticky outside so be prepared for extremes. Get your DD a wrap or jacket as well.

This is lovely. Thank you. I didn’t know anything like this could be acquired for a price like that!!

Love this. Thank you for sharing.

Thank you. I had not thought about my DD needing a wrap or jacket
will add to my list!

Thanks everyone.
you are correct. It seems the wedding evening is likely to be very glam.

I checked the wedding website and it has now been updated with the dress code

”Black tie optional, from tuxes to suits and gowns to cocktail attire.”

https://ebay.us/m/buWkLu
This would fit you but likely would need shortening.

I guess this is not a church wedding if it’s in the evening? If it is, you’ll probably need to cover your shoulders.

Probably not church no (although because the rules in the US are much less restrictive, anyone might be officiating. Catholics would make you do it in church, but many Protestant ministers will officiate elsewhere, as will rabbis, judges, etc)

I would go for a cocktail dress/gown personally.

Sounds like a great opportunity to have three different outfits. There's also the option of hiring something. Or buying on Vinted or eBay if there's a brand you like that you know fits you.

It could be worth having a personal shopper appointment at John Lewis if you live near a branch. No obligation to buy and you should get some good ideas.