Going grey - how to do no more dye? Temp ? Toning?

[Holidaymodeon]

As the title says, I’m going grey after dyeing for the best part of forty years. I started going grey very young, precocious puberty and I’ve been dyeing ever since.
i stopped for a while in lockdown and that was my original cue to stop altogether but I got halfway there and vanity gave in.
i have now decided I don’t have money or time to go through expensive cuts and dyes, the dye affects my hair condition and I actually want to see what happens when it comes through completely.
i just don’t know how to deal with this stage.
I’ve had it cut much shorter and hairdressers says it’s much easier to grow out because I’m curly but I still don’t like this demarcation….

what do people do, what have you done? Is it just a case of grin and bear it?
can I tone it?

Have a look at Stu that coiffeur on Instagram. His specialty is grey blending. He's not in the UK but it might give you some ideas to take to your own hairdresser.

Thank you. I don’t use social media for ‘reasons’ ,
I’ve tried to search him elsewhere but can I only find links to him on fb or ig!

Hmm i get mine blended in with highlights and toner, have been doing for last year or so and it seems to be working

Thanks, I’ve been doing that or versions of that forever, I don’t want any more highlights as it is just affecting the condition of my already very porous hair (afro Caribbean heritage)

I should also add , my hair is very dark brown naturally but has got lighter over decades of dyeing and highlighting. Underneath at the back is my natural brunette with slight red

Invest in some hats! I grew mine out in Covid, it was awful and I avoided looking at myself too much for a year or so, and had regular cuts. It looks good now, though. My natural hair is thick, wavy and a medium brown, very dark brown underneath, with a red tinge to it. It looked very patchy to begin with but as each year passes it’s evened out and now looks good. I’m 46. I think having waves means it looks much more integrated and highlighted rather than with straight hair. If I straighten it, all the grey is on top, brown underneath, and it looks weird.

FWIW, I used colour stripper (Colour b4 ultimate I think) a couple of times which got rid of a lot of the dye and reduced the transition line a lot. You can absolutely do a toner or a semipermanent in a cool blonde (as the dye wash out tends to leave it warm) and as you'll see it more on the roots it will make things even.
I grew my dye out at 38 and never had any regrets

I'm just growing it out. It feels awful but it will be done soon enough. I cut it to above chin length

I've only got a few of inches to go now

You can get a root spray to blend the colour while you’re growing it out? It washes out

I tried growing out my dye and going grey , luckily mine came through as highlights rather than solid white root growth,
I then had massive hair loss after illness , it was sparse and fuzzy like cotton wool , then grew back corrugated

I saw a photo of my head , the white hair was like a halo of wiry hairs . So I thought stuff this and went back to semi permeant dye

Grey hair looks great on some , I envy the sleek silver look but it wasn't right for me .

Thank you so much everyone for sharing.

I haven’t tried a root spray. I will consider it as an occasional temporary solution .

my hair has also become very sparse vs and wiry ,
I’ve been very ill on and off for years and I think menopause has accelerated the hair loss and greyness if that’s possible?
im really conscious of my scalp whereas id never noticed it before.
i feel like dyeing just seems to dull my hair now whereas when i was younger dye seemed to add gloss too, at least for a short period

my hair was long before, halfway down my back, I went to chin length and it’s grown out to the nape of my neck or slightly longer.

I miss having long hair but I feel short and curlier disguises the root growth a bit (may be kidding myself here!)

I had quite some success with this. https://amzn.eu/d/0clr1qYE

It’s just a coloured mask, applied like conditioner every few washes. It kind of added an overall greyness that reduced the line between old and new.

Thank you I like this idea!

My hair is quite curly and I found it was easy to grow out the greys, the demarcation is definitely less noticeable and because the grey doesn’t always come in in a block it looks fine. With your hair I would grow it a little more now to see how you feel about the new grey growth before deciding whether you need a little colour to help you in the interim period.

There are shampoos that stain and blend roots a bit. You just leave them on for 5 minutes before rinsing. I use a Superdrug one and tried out a few shades. I'm in the same boat as you though further on. The colour depositing shampoos do give a bit of a multitonal effect on grey as grey isn't usually uniform all over. My underlayers are darker than the crown roots for example. It is really the only way to break the cycle whilst still keeping some colour interest.

I REALLY want to grow out mine. I dye it dark brown but get a white line every 3 weeks. I have tried to just let it go for a while but honestly it makes me looks around 20 years older. It is so aging and haggard looking on me. I told someone I was considering it and she asked me if I had depression 🫥. My hair is very fine and I get pink scalp in the summer months so worry I will look like a bald rabbit.

Sorry that wasn't very helpful!

I had a choppy cut (wavy hair) to get most of the dye out then switched to semi permanent dye for a while.

I think it's just getting used to the difference. Semi certainly stops the horrible line of dye. After a while, I found I actually liked my hair better when the semi was fading out.

Now, I use superdrug colour effects in honey blonde, which just gives a slight haze to the grey and doesn't ruin the condition of my hair.

I really don’t think the regrowth looks bad!
My eventually came through like grey highlights, I quite like it now.

I use this. My natural colour is dark brown, now with a lot of white in it. It tones the white a mid brown colour so it looks a bit like highlights. Once the ends of my hair that still have permanent dye on them have been cut out I'll probably switch to one like the steel grey one the pp mentioned.

https://www.lookfantastic.com/p/wella-professionals-color-fresh-semi-permanent-colour-mask-cool-espresso-150ml/14023707/?affil=thggpsad&switchcurrency=GBP&shippingcountry=GB&affil=thggpsad&kwds=&thg_ppc_campaign=21449632734&adtype=pla_with_promotion&product_id=14023707&cq_src=google_ads&cq_cmp=21449632734&cq_con=&cq_term=&cq_med=pla_with_promotion&cq_plac=&cq_net=x&cq_plt=gp&gclsrc=aw.ds&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=21456160064&gclid=Cj0KCQjwm6POBhCrARIsAIG58CL_LXFv0mmJQQXfv_xweow3Qdv1ADMZBBvI9KWjVUXRkqI4WsDW_UgaAn5GEALw_wcB

ETA: it's called a semi permanent but it's really just a colour depositing mask. You dont have to mix up chemicals or time it exactly, and it fades out after a few washes.

I did cuts and toner every 6 to 8 weeks until the dye was out. Took me 18ish months and I love it now. Everyone comments on how fab it looks.

I would keep getting a good cut op. Make sure you use a good conditioner too.
I wouldn’t dye your hair.
I've stopped dying mine and it’s in better condition. I use a product to tame any frizzy grey bits. I can’t remember the name of it, might be Garnier hair bond or something. It’s a serum type product which smooths and binds the hair. You can buy it in Boots.

What about a “defy grey” type shampoo for a few months? It will tone down the grey all over and you can just stop using it when you want to.

Thanks so much everyone for comments , advice and encouragement.
Ive had a lot of people try to talk me out of this and I’m sure that’s why I have kept going back to dye again.

annoyingly I did have some nice colour depositing masks but got rid of them a while back, I never really understood them but that’s before I started to grow out my hair!

I bought some toner and I planned to do something with it today but got too tired, maybe I should do a deep conditioning treatment first

Not heard of one of these, will google, thank you