Help needed for an inveterate scruff who needs to look presentable for cocktails and a meal out with dh's new boss.

[LongTermLurker]

I'm 50, size 10-12, 5'6". Usually wear kinda frumpy cords and woolly jumpers. Was thinking of the same sort of garments but fancier....like a fancy jumper and, erm...nice cords? Also always wear sensible wide toe shoes like hobibear, and I'm unwilling to wear any heels. So maybe some nice looking comfy shoes?

Would prefer to get stuff on vinted if possible.

Pleeeaaase help 🥺

Yes & no, I suppose?? I'm a Chartered Landscape Architect, now specialising purely in my first love, garden design. So in design rather than pure arts.

The architecture & landscape architecture schools were part of the art college though, so the course was more arty than scientific. And my friends were all in fashion, painting, tapestry, jewellery etc.

Those looks could be pity - or they could be jealousy?!! I know quite a few well-to-do people (male & female) who've made their money in finance/tech/law etc - & then retired early, or gone part-time to start painting/sculpture/interior design etc. Some of them are even quite talented ... grrrr!!!

@EleanorMc67 Oh so you're allowed to wear COS sacks AND be covered in mud then. Genius

I've not been in to have a feel ... though I have my eye on the Autograph silk ones! I don't do scratchy ...

Only if I fall over or one of the landscape contractors pushes me!!

Sometimes it's sacks, sometimes hi-viz, sometimes vintage silk kimonos ... depends on my mood/the weather/what the day holds!!!

If you're invited to DH's new boss, a good starting point would be to ask previous guests how Mr and Mrs Boss style themselves.

His male colleagues might have a vague idea. Wives and partners will have more.

Hear me out here - but I bought my 13yo a Damart thermal vest and she loved it so much that she wears it as a top! Like, ALL the time.https://www.damart.co.uk/thermolactyl-soft-warmth-short-sleeved-t-shirt-73907-3.html?color_filterable=39800

Or maybe something like this one would be good under a velvet jacket? www.damart.co.uk/thermolactyl-long-sleeve-top-83307-3.html?color_filterable=39800

M&S have some dark denim wide leg jeans with a seam at the front, they look great and I think nicer than cords. I’d then add a statement shirt and your Vinted jacket

https://www.marksandspencer.com/cotton-rich-wide-leg-ankle-grazer/p/clp60760512?intid=mobile_app_pdp_share

I also like the Harper jeans, straight leg and would look good with your ankle boots

https://www.zara.com/uk/en/striped-satin-shirt-p02240113.html

https://www.zara.com/uk/en/striped-shirt-with-bow-p02390116.html

this shirt looks amazing on! I wore it at the weekend and got loads of compliments and the bow sits well with a smart jacket.
im similar age and build.

So many good ideas!! I really appreciate it all. For some reason the photo of my boots isn't uploading :-/

Shopping hasn't been a great success today - I got sidetracked and ended up buying a gorgeous handknitted fairisle jumper on Vinted. Sigh.

I'm actually the same, OP. Nowadays, pretty much everything I wear is from eBay or, latterly, Vinted. Partly sustainability & ethics - but now that I'm freelance, finances play a large part too.

I'm very specific about labels & fabric & what I want though. And am usually familiar with the labels I buy, so I know that they'll fit me. Plus, I'm pretty confident about my own style & what suits me.

However, I don't think is the case here (even if you do normally buy your woolly jumpers & cords on Vinted!!)?? You're looking for clothing styles you don't normally wear, from unfamiliar labels, & hoping they can all come from Vinted - all within the next week & a bit? And you want them all to come together to create a really smart outfit?

It's really commendable that you'd like to get everything from Vinted - but I'm not sure that it's sensible ...?!!!

Give it another go. And if your jacket has arrived, take a decent picture of you wearing it & post that too!

So you've just bought a fairisle jumper ... It sounds to me as if you might be avoidance-shopping, as you hate the idea of this dinner ...??!!!

I do think, for an invitation to drinks/dinner with a new boss, that there's always the desire to make a good impression? And that includes being smartly & appropriately dressed - & that expectation will also usually apply to your partner.
So, @LongTermLurker , I do find it a bit odd that you have just defaulted to wearing a different jumper & different cords than usual ...?

Are the drinks & dinner taking place at a cocktail bar/restaurant &, if so, do you know what kind of vibe the venues have? It IS possible to look sleek & well turned-out with a jumper & trousers - but the polished looks shown all seem very different to what you're naturally drawn to, OP?

I think quite a few of the more casual pieces suggested above are rather more "afternoon coffee with friends" than "meeting my partner's new boss for the first time at a cocktail bar & restaurant" ... at least they seem so to me ...? Some of the cocktail bars here are more of the hip & earnest bearded/tattooed/funky trainer type places; some more the silk dress & heels. Neither type is really cord trousers & warm woolly jumpers ...

@LongTermLurker Zara did a very similar blouse, this is the Vinted pic!

Are you a West Ham supporter? 😁

@mcmuffin22
Definitely not, though my team is stripes.

its really not my usual
colours at all but I saw it in the window and loved it.

Trying again...

Nice boots, they would work well with smart jeans.
m&s do fishnet pop socks that look good between a cropped leg and an ankle boot, plus I then wear ankle socks so the boots are comfy

@EleanorMc67 " It sounds to me as if you might be avoidance-shopping, as you hate the idea of this dinner ...??!!!" 😂 Erm yes? I mean, I'm sure boss and boss-wife will be very nice, but DH hasn't actually started in the job yet, so it's hanging out with two people I don't know at all, and it's not even that liberating "hanging out with strangers" thing... I don't want to give a bad impression.

And I have been looking in LOADS of online shops. M&S, John Lewis. Monsoon, Zara (such stern models!!l), nobody's child, jigsaw, Hobbs, ghost, all saints, religion, mango, sosander... There's actually loads of lovely stuff out there!

Oh yes, there is indeed!! Lots!! Too tempting 😶

I couldn't be arsed with an impressing-the-new-boss dinner either ... but I do have plenty of clothes for it! My motto is "if in doubt, overdress ..."!!! It's not failed me yet 😁

The one post you did comment on quite enthusiastically was the Hobbs/Poetry &, you said, especially Jigsaw outfits? I went back & looked & they're actually not at all hippie-ish - they're all rather minimal? But what they are is tactile - wool & silk & cashmere etc - & in earthy warm/subtly rich colour palettes than tone well together? Burgundies, olives, teal blues etc. And said you really need to update your working wardrobe?

Why not choose an outfit from somewhere like Jigsaw that will do both? And accessorise it up for dinner?

Spending money on a few good-quality pieces of clothing that will a) last, b) not date quickly & c) you can dress up or down, is actually just as sustainable & economical in the longer term as buying miscellaneous bits on Vinted that then don't match ... more so I think, if this is not the kind of clothes shopping you'll be doing often!!

I'd also say, re Jigsaw, that the models' outfits online, or the Complete The Look recommendations below an item (either Smart Casual or Work - you probably want the former) are great.

Another thing about Jigsaw is that they always have their own colour palettes, which are just slightly different interpretations of "in" colours that I always find really wearable - & because they're "Jigsaw colours" they tone together really well? Which you can see in the outfit that you really liked?

I would say this is both a smart casual & a work look. But, I'd also say that it's easily accessorised to make it enough of a going out for dinner outfit? And all the elements - a good unlined wool coat, wide trousers, a lightweight cashmere jumper, a leather bag & flats - are extremely versatile? Yes they're not Vinted prices, even in the sale - but they're lovely & you said you really like the outfit?

(Can you tell I'm a big fan of Jigsaw? It's by far my favourite high street shop!)

Why not (with only a week to go) just get this outfit or similar from Jigsaw - & then you can stop panicking & looking at a million other websites plus Vinted?!!!

Start with this classic wrap coat. It is unlined, double-faced wool - so you can wear it in spring & autumn, not just winter. It's £150 down from £375, which is an absolute bargain!!

Only listed in XL - but I can see there are both S & M in stores near me. If you can't find it in a store near you, phone customer services, who will locate one & you can call that store & buy it over the phone.

(I am slightly biased - I have this coat from previous seasons in both green & red & I love it!!!)

What about a cords boiler suit? https://www.joebrowns.co.uk/pixie-stretch-cord-jumpsuit-wm016?___store=GBP&glCountry=UK&glCurrency=GBP&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=22839863889&gbraid=0AAAAAD5kyI39GPAG3CKvrTg8Cu1FVsq_x&gclid=CjwKCAjwyMnNBhBNEiwA-KcguyUBQjc3d7P6g9AInbTXczjMhslt4GhW5iXQdP7JUxuIj8eEU6OQOxoCcLEQAvD_BwE#colour=244&utm_campaign=&utm_adgroup=&utm_kwd=&utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_content=&utm_cid=CjwKCAjwyMnNBhBNEiwA-KcguyUBQjc3d7P6g9AInbTXczjMhslt4GhW5iXQdP7JUxuIj8eEU6OQOxoCcLEQAvD_BwE