Too sexy for a funeral?

[Trainup]

My friend thinks the outfit I’m planning to wear to a close family member’s funeral is ‘too sexy’. It’s a fitted (but not tight) black velvet dress, high neck and knee length. Thin black tights and ankle boots with a mid block heel. I have literally no skin on show except my hands and face.

I haven’t been to a funeral in a long time. Is she right? Should I dress down a bit? If so, what type of thing is appropriate?

This is a party dress so not really appropriate for a funeral. Think of a black dress you would wear for a job interview and that would likely be more appropriate.

Its fine. Go for thicker black tights and you'll have your coat on most of the time.

I'd do thick black tights and flats with something over it like a blazer or cardigan

I think it’s fine. Wear thicker tights and black coat and bag and it’ll be fine!

Not appropriate at all. Velvet party dress and fitted? Absolutely not.

Exactly, I wore a suitable summer dress in red/ orange lightweight silk dress and red heels to my parents funerals.
It seemed suitable knowing them, and it was June, nearly a decade ago

Absolutely fine for a funeral in my opinion.

I think its fine even if your the height of the model.

It’s perfectly appropriate.

I would say you need to wear something that’s not shiny like that. I wear smart dark dresses, sometimes with a slight pattern, but no one would wear a shiny velvety dress.

Looks more like a party dress. Not appropriate.

Looks fine to me. I wore a black swing dress to a funeral recently, it was crew neck and knee length and no one minded.

Don’t wear velvet

Seems fine to me. Black velvet will look very smart.

Who is the deceased to you? Of it is a close family member then it’s your choice, if it’s not then office wear is a good steer so as not to upset family.

This

I would never think that velvet looks smart. It looks like what it is, a party dress. It might look OK for a funeral with opaque black tights and low heeled shoes, if it sits on the knee. Do you have a black coat?

No me neither, I was also surprised by that response.

Your friend thinks it’s too sexy - I’d argue that any outfit you wear to a funeral shouldn’t be remotely sexy!

Sounds lovely but too ‘try hard’ for a modern funeral - its the kind of thing you see on the widow in TV Dramas, with lots of makeup and a hat with a veil.

While not technically inappropriate, black is less of a necessity for most funerals now and even if going for black, business casual is about as smart as it gets. If your friend thinks you’d feel (and be) overdressed in black velvet she’s pprobably not wrong.

Depends on the person who died and their family- if you do wear it with opaque tights, are you also putting a cardigan or blazer over it? I probably wouldn’t wear it just as it is

It looks like a little black dress for a party/date to me even if it’s longer on you. I’d put a blazer or something over it I think.

I would think black or opaque tights. No point in offending anyone.

It’s fine. Honestly, what century are some people living in that they think there is still some sort of prescribed funeral wear. There isn’t.