Help - too old to know what to wear

[Toooldtopretend]

I’m 49 and have no idea how to dress for a night out any more. City centre, weekend night out type thing, meal, bar etc. I just feel old and wrong! would love some guidance please.

I’m very average height (5’6”) and size 10.

thank you for any ideas/links!

I love @themumlife_styled

I can relate, OP. I went to a city centre bar recently on a Saturday night and I wore leather knee boots with a silk midi skirt and a cashmere jumper. I thought that was about right, but I felt so uncomfortable all evening. Everyone else was in tiny dresses and the highest heels. I had thought tiny dresses and high heels were very dated, so why was everyone dressed like this? It has left me really confused about what people wear for a night out.

She’s my ‘go to’, too.

I find when I am in London or Barcelona that strangers often come and ask where I got my outfit. I take that as a compliment and it encourages me to clothes shop. I would not go with compliments from people I know as pretty much every lady at a wedding or event tells everyone they look fabulous because that is what we want to hear. But if someone you don’t know approaches you go with that as a style that suits you.
if you are not getting that go into a store and say to the assistant “ Help! I don’t know what to wear anymore!” Trust me they love it snd will find you some things that you feel comfy in but are a little more edgy.

Jumpsuit! And trainers or proper shoes if you can hack it x

I have my eye on the following 2 party tops (not that I need any of course) I'm 53
White Stuff and Phase Eight

Either with black plisse trousers/black velvet cigarette pants or wide legged cord crops.

Footwear would be either velvet/metallic sandals/mary janes/sparkly trainers.

I think you’d like Erica Davies on Instagram - she is fabulous.

Check out “and.bloom” on insta.

she has a really nice, put together style I think. She also sells some pieces.

From a male perspective. A lady who is comfortable with herself, is the most attractive quality. Who cares what other people think, it's your night out, so enjoy it and wear whatever makes you feel good.

At 49 you are in your prime. Wear what makes you feel comfortable, be yourself and have fun. Simples😉

Oh for the love of God. " As a man I think....." 😡
This is such an infuriating thread in mpre ways than one.

That website hasn't been updated in 14 months..... Sadly not current for fashions.

Has the OP said anything about wanting men to find her attractive? No one cares what you find attractive, that’s not relevant to the conversation

@ClosetPianoMan why do you think your opinion matters to the OP? To be honest I find it a bit creepy that you're hanging around on a women's style and beauty forum - is there nowhere women can have to themselves without men popping up to share their 'wisdom'? Aren't there any men's forums that interest you or isn't there enough chance to be patronising when you're talking to other blokes?

I would wear a dress and tights and doc marten boots or jeans a nice blouse or top and doc marten boots.

I hear you OP, I’m a lot older than you at 58 and have lost my way a bit, what I find helps is looking at what a celebrity who is in your age group whose style you like wears, I find it quite a helpful, for me it’s Jennifer Anniston. For my work’s Christmas do I’m going to wear something similar to the picture though I’m swapping the skinnies for flares and I will wear heels despite what others say on here about them being dated, I don’t want to wear flats or trainers when I’m in a nice bar, I will accessorise with gold jewellery and a clutch to elevate it to a more evening look.

I was shopping at the weekend and tried on a knitted dress - I’ve never tried one on in my life because I felt self conscious but I felt amazing in it. Put it back as I don’t really have a reason to wear it but have just bought online and will find a time to wear!

it’s really handy just trying lots of different things on and figuring out your own style

Ah ok, I follow them on insta where they post almost daily, but OP said she wasn’t on insta.

49 is not "too old" for anything 😆

Ok, I’ll wear my brightly coloured dungarees with knitted booties and a headband with a huge bow on it then. And accessorise it with a dummy on the end of a necklace.

I would say get a pair of black leather block heeled ankle boots with a narrow shaft. Pointed toe or squared. Get some jeans in a current shape - barrel, straight or wide - whichever suits you best. Get a mid to dark blue pair and a black pair. Invest in a nice black leather belt with an interesting buckle in a style you like. Get some long sleeved tops - t-shirt type and/or fine wool in neutral colours - black, navy, camel etc. Find a good jacket - faux fur is current or a barn jacket - and a long coat - there's a great one in Mango for £100. Add a couple of pairs of nice gold earrings. Get a black bag in a current shape. This will give you plenty of options.

I’m 49 and feeling exactly the same and I feel quite sad. I’m a good solid size 14 and only 5 ft tall so feeling dumpy and frumpy. I’m recovering from surgery though so that does add to my current woes at the moment. And I love clothes but I just am struggling so much at the moment

”most attractive”
Ugh that’s such a male mindset.

As much as it might be a revelation to you, some of us want to look good for ourselves not to ‘attract’ anybody else.

if you live near a John Lewis they offer a free, no obligation personal stylist service where they will spend an hour or two with you going round the shop and picking some outfits for you to try. That could give you some ideas?

I know she gets a lot of flack but I still follow Kat Farmer because she just gives me the little boost I need to get out of my comfort zone.