Help - too old to know what to wear

[Toooldtopretend]

I’m 49 and have no idea how to dress for a night out any more. City centre, weekend night out type thing, meal, bar etc. I just feel old and wrong! would love some guidance please.

I’m very average height (5’6”) and size 10.

thank you for any ideas/links!

I was trying to come from a 'you're young, wear what you like!' perspective, I'm not being unking. I wanted to offer some perspective, 57 is not old, look at Kylie and how young she dresses... and Op is younger at a 49! A spring chicken.

I get it OP, I found myself in a real style rut in my 40s. I’d recommend following a few influencers on Instagram, see if anything catches your eye. I like wearsmymoney and stylebyclairelopez.

Go into shops and try stuff on. Don’t be afraid to try stuff you wouldn’t normally.

i’ve recently bought a satin skirt from Uniqlo that I will wear with chunky jumpers, a fluid shirt or a shorter sleeve fine knit ‘going out’ style top.

another recent purchase was a pair of dark indigo barrel leg jeans, which are nice with a silk shirt.

I'm the same age and find it really hard as well. I don't get an opportunity to go out and 'dress up' often either which really doesn't help.
I was always size 8-10 and now I'm 12-14 and am completely lost. I wore graphic tshirts, jeans, converse and a leather jacket. Now I feel incredibly old and old fashioned wearing these.

I just wear wide leg jeans and a long sleeved top. I find shirts look a bit too 'dressy' for me. But people my age are dressed much better than me when I go out. I'm not a blazer person and would feel a bit trussed up in one as if I'm off to an interview in the 1990s. Dresses were never my thing although I wore short skirts, thick tights and biker boots but now I'd feel ridiculous in them and they wouldn't fit me anyway.

I was browsing online recently and saw a pair of trousers I liked. I bought the top they were paired with as well and its a 'complete' outfit. I intend to wear it out over Christmas.

Same here! I’m a size 12-14 but Apple shape so look terrible in everything- it all looks shapeless on me. I have no natural waistline and just look rubbish 😩 it puts me off going out now

Sweetie,
Same age,
Almost the same measurements,
Same problem.
I've worked from home for the past 20 years, and just now am facing having to get employment out of the house and you know, I've absolutely never had a clue how to dress (I went from my mother choosing my outfits when I was in grade school, to going to high school with a uniform, to having uniform dress code at work, to working from home and being in the position where I never saw a customer face to face so I could wear whatever I like)
And I've never had any success knowing how to apply makeup or how to do anything with my hair aside from a ponytail and even that's stretching my skills.
And I feel completely clueless about what goes with what and what shouldn't go with what, so I know exactly how you feel.
And if people want to be snarky (or in their opinion matter of fact) and say that you should be checking the internet for fashion advice, well, no duh.
It's just nice to be able to ask real people who might be able to give personalized advice and kindness and empathy and understanding.
I see there's been a number of posts that seem to be quite helpful so, that's something :-)

Hi would you share a picture of your boots? I’m on the lookout for nice ones to wear with skirts!

Try a few things on in shops.I am almost 59 ,size 12, 5 foot 2 and like wearing velvet clothes,dresses, trousers, I don't worry about fashion. You don't have to wear on trend either but it would suit you, what ever you choose to wear.Go for what makes you feel glamorous and confident, when you look in the mirror.

I should have added, I wear boots with chunky heels,with dresses.It means you can actually walk🤣

I’m the same age. I personally avoid anything too tight , as I think it’s a bit dated . Barrel leg jeans or wide leg jeans and a lightweight jumper with jeans or boots is my go too. There are a lot of fluffy short sleeve jumpers around that look great with jeans.

Ah thank you, it’s nice to see some understanding. I WFH a lot and can do casual and can do dressy but struggle with the in between! Im still stuck in an era of heels which seem so dated now, so just interested in some inspiration.

I’m not - would be good to have some ideas of where to start. I know there’s lots out there but finding it is hard!

Have a look at &otherstories jeans page. 70s vibe. Not dissimilar to mid/late 90s, we were there before.
www.harpersbazaar.com/fashion/trends/g6495/70s-fashion-in-photos/

Sorry you got a pile on OP, I hope you come back.

I'm 49 too, had DC and never got into following influences on insta. I was still wearing what I wore in my 20s, and I did like it but I also felt very out of place in it.

I didn't even own trainers! I still only wear them with jeans in the sumer but I have embraced flat footwear.

It appears pretty much anything goes these days, if you want to be fashionable look out for the details - it appears to be bows, lace and glitter (but prob just for Christmas). I'd buy an entire new outfit or two rather than trying to add a few pieces to update what you have, although all jeans are embraced at the moment.

Thank you. I have ordered some kitten heel boots. I struggle with feeling dressy in flats although I love the comfort, it’s just not what we did 1995-2010 which was my peak socialising season, hence feeling outdated!

S&B has turned rather mean lately.

hmm, not sure Kylie is your average 57 year old though 😂. I’ll dig out a red wide legged hooded onesie and give it a go eh!

I’m much older but my current evening wear is a Zara satin skirt, kitten heeled boots and a jumper

Personally think the jeans and nice top thing is over .
Was out last weekend in a city lots of wide leg trousers some fitted blouses and some knitwear . A few straight skirts too - not seen that skirt shape for a few years - forgot how flattering it was. Dresses also .
My favourite outfit spotted was a fine knitted dress worn with suede knee length boots .
Also saw a few fake fur coats which has tempted me to try one on .
Lots of huge oversized envelope bags too . Small triangle neck scarves also.

I would suggest you take some time to go into town and try things on - I’m a big believer that you look good if you feel good and if you find some things you really love on yourself you can build an outfit around it

my main issue is shoes - particularly with dresses in summer. I just can’t get it right!

Thanks for your understanding. I’m glad it’s not just me - was starting to think everyone was else had no aging/style issues whatsoever. Makes you wonder why they need a S&B thread at all, maybe just to feel superior!

“Lost my way” is fine and entirely different to “49 is old” and offending half the audience! I’m a similar age and love my style.

There so much…but so little. Im
ok looking for an individual item but overwhelmed by a whole new look which I think I need. I’ll give the insta advice a go, am happy to have a starting point despite having to wade through the unnecessary disparaging posts. Good luck-hope this post helps you with some inspiration too x

But old is subjective - when you’ve not really thought about your style and you look around and there’s people 20 years younger looking trendy - it can give you a wobble because compared to them you are old and you can question whether you should be looking at what you see them wearing/magazines or reaching for the twin set!

its a bit thin skinned to read the OP and take it as a personal insult

Agreed, @Bruisername.

@CindyCuthbert, the OP, says she feels old. Surely she's allowed to feel that? If someone on here said they felt fat at 12st (my weight) I'd just get on with my day, tbh, and continue to feel a perfectly normal size.

I'm 62 and wearing leather look skinny jeans, heels and sheer blouse tucked in at the front, gold hooped earrings and a smile.