Desperate to find mother of the groom clothes

[Sunbeds]

My eldest son gets married in March next year and I’m really excited about it. It’s going to be a small wedding (around 50 people) and the event is taking place at the same venue (ceremony, wedding breakfast and evening celebrations).

But I am getting quite stressed! I really don’t know what to wear! The mother of the bride has copied my son’s suit colours and will look elegant in a velvet sheath dress. Meanwhile I am totally clueless. Help!!!
I’m 5’6”, a slim mid fifties woman with shoulder length hair, size 12. I have no cleavage 🙈, need to cover my upper arms and, even though I’m slim (no love handles etc), I have a lower tummy bump that won’t go away - honestly I’ve dieted, exercised (run regularly) but I’m stuck with it after four children. I am told that I suit “warm” colours (smoky tints), not pastels at all.
The wedding party and flowers are faun, cream, burgundy, apricot. We’re eating curry wraps so I don’t want a pale outfit just in case.
I tried this dress

but I was unhappy with the tummy bump in profile. It did cover everything else that I don’t like about me.
I feel like going in a big baggy sack.
What would you suggest?
My absolute limit is £300 as I need to fix up the rest of us with clothes. I don’t mind buying on eBay.

No link. Is £300 including shoes and hat?
March is likely to be cold so you will need a coat/tunic/jacket as well.

Shibumi on EBay?

Sorry, the link didn’t paste
https://www.johnlewis.com/adrianna-papell-floral-bead-mesh-midi-dress-navy-multi/p113022384
try again!

Not including shoes. Plan to put my hair up.

I love that dress!
speaking as a nearly 20 stone woman believe me you are nowhere near needing to wear a sack!!!
although I can appreciate that when you’re unhappy with something it seems a huge thing to you, but the dress has a lot of detail around the tummy area so I’m sure others won’t notice so much and have you tried some suck it all in shapewear pants? They really do make a difference

That dress is beautiful

I wore a very similar dress to DN spring wedding a few years ago, it very flattering. I’m totally shocked you can still buy it now, but here’s the link. Phase Eight always seem to recycle the same dresses every year, and change the colours etc.

https://www.phase-eight.com/product/esmeralda-embroidered-fit-%26-flare-dress-220083493.html?cq_src=google_ads&cq_cmp=22580106175&cq_net=g&cq_plt=gp&utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=22580106175&utm_content=183528896367&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=22580106175&gbraid=0AAAAADumyC8exCvwKE11uhDBPe2rfMEtE&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIzI7tlf3VjwMV-6VQBh0IkTddEAQYByABEgIqavD_BwE#gad_source_1

I think you've found a really nice dress @Sunbeds !

I sent it back. I just couldn’t look at my tummy in profile. I know I’d hug it in for a while but I’d forget during the day hahaha!

You have plenty of time! Many shops and sites have the dregs of summer stock at the moment, more will come in. Have a look at Wolf & Badger or The Outnet if you want something a bit more unusual than the usual JL etc offerings. Here’s a few suggestions, but I’d also say with 6 months to go, why not give Pilates a try? It’s transformed my shape with 3 classes a week. Definitely go to an in person class or personal trainer, as it sounds like this stomach issue is affecting your confidence. As a bonus, it’s fixed my niggling lower back pain!

hope you get something lovely

@Defiantly41 I get that lower back pain too! My legs are lovely and strong with running but Pilates and those knickers might help if I can find an online class as I struggle to get out at normal times (run at 6am)

Love the green velvet dress! Where’s that from?

I wore a velvet jumpsuit to my son’s wedding last year…

@Cyclistmumgrandma oh WOW! That’s spectacular!!! I bet you looked incredible xx

I also really like the one you returned. Suppose you’ve got to be at ease though.

https://www.wolfandbadger.com/uk/kiara-brown-dresses/

I know it would not be for everyone - does this horrify you? I was thinking with their chosen colours this would be quite striking, and would be elegant without a large bust to throw the line out.

What colour is your hair?

Serious tummy holding in knickers could minimise that. Believe it or not, I got some from Shein. They have rigid bones in. I got a smaller size and the effect is dramatically minimising my lower tummy situation. You can buy ones like this from loads of places online. They are much more effective than Spanx and the like.

Some safer ideas..

How about something shaped like this -

https://sylverton.com/products/dove-elegant-lantern-sleeve-dress?currency=GBP&variant=55504507502969&utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=Google%20Shopping&stkn=3731765a1736&utm_campaign=22098437458&utm_ad_group=&utm_ad=&utm_source=google&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=22094648342&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIlfa_n4nWjwMV86RQBh1xkAFyEAQYGiABEgIChvD_BwE

Never heard of this brand, may be appalling quality. But it’s a striking shape and hides the bits you don’t like without being sacky.

This ties in with the colour scheme but who can say how it would do on the tum. It’s chic (IMO)

https://www.tedbaker.com/products/samalee-dk-red-1?variant=50532690526529&country=GB&stkn=1690d4ad124d&utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=Google+Shopping&kbx_src=google&kbx_cmp=22262976865&kbx_mdm=cpc&kbx_trm=176079243358&kbx_cnt=733635214701&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=22262976865&gbraid=0AAAAADlozORMD5a0vafwX0baNJkgC8TmV&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIlfa_n4nWjwMV86RQBh1xkAFyEAQYJCABEgLQovD_BwE

Could pair it with this or something similar -

https://www.etsy.com/uk/listing/1808604710/?ref=share_ios_native_control

I also added potential shoes for all the frocks cos why not 😂
https://www.marksandspencer.com/leather-cross-strap-almond-toe-slingback-shoes/p/clp60746592?intid=mobile_app_pdp_share

https://www.riverisland.com/p/brown-perspex-flower-court-slingback-heels-926261?utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=nonbrand_shopping&gclsrc=aw.ds&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=22622895321&gbraid=0AAAAADtCggheH7RSSlbvE_PT37kpS-rpx&gclid=EAIaIQobChMI76XqwYrWjwMV7JNQBh0VMCXxEAQYGiABEgISc_D_BwE

https://www.samedelman.co.uk/hazel-pointed-toe-heel.html?color=554&utm_source=google_shopping&utm_medium=cpc&crtp=paidsearch&aid=15584&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=22318205019&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIofKP4YjWjwMVHpRQBh3RQCYnEAQYECABEgJJXfD_BwE

And some navy options as the previous dress was navy? I don’t hugely like this but I can see it’s elegant and it might hide a tum 😬

https://www.phase-eight.com/product/audrey-jewelled-neck-navy-midi-dress-100015235114.html?cq_src=google_ads&cq_cmp=20294038518&cq_net=x&cq_plt=gp&utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=20294038518&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=20303461198&gbraid=0AAAAADumyC81s2ivbcGs52TmTHFAP3VGp&gclid=Cj0KCQjwrJTGBhCbARIsANFBfgum1ZjxN6z5SBXEblD715GJCFwwO-Gzm-sXf5GqGOzdRoZMCFj2ZnsaAhdwEALw_wcB

This is a solid MOG look. Albeit pricey. There are a lot of similar cheaper dresses.

https://www.hollandcooper.com/products/annabel-lace-dress-ink-navy?variant=54958383202682&currency=GBP&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=18263218551&gbraid=0AAAAAC3KQN2sW2wv4n5Nh-VRcPHtpmUad&gclid=Cj0KCQjwrJTGBhCbARIsANFBfguA4zKlUcUgAs3KgnjzP6wZBY-8sNhbUEOV-W9mmhQN88qkOFtHTRAaAvzaEALw_wcB

Apologies for the mega-links!

@NewDogOwner I will take a look at those. I could wear something like that if the Pilates doesn’t work. Thank you. Can you still get them off for a week?
Regretting returning that dress… Just think I am panicking.

Have a look at Debenhams on-line.
They have LOADS of dresses of all sorts of different styles, and also a variety of prices, so you could start to narrow down what you would / wouldn't consider then order a few to try.

@usedtobeprettybutImalrightnow thank you for such a thorough list!
I do like the sylverton dresses. Very reasonably priced.
Wishing I hadn’t returned the other one. No longer in stock.

You could book a personal shopper at John Lewis. It's free. My DD had one and she ended up buying something she wouldn't have considered normally

This might be a bit paler than you are looking for but it is a lovely shape https://www.johnlewis.com/jolie-moi-sloan-collar-dress-sage-green/p113100731
or
https://www.johnlewis.com/jolie-moi-roll-collar-midi-dress-mint-green/p113509521

This one has a drape to hide the tummy https://www.johnlewis.com/kaffe-kelly-velvet-draped-shift-dress/garden-topiary/p112680003

@Oblahdeeoblahdoe thats a good idea actually. I’ve been plundering ChatGPT until it’s out of ideas so that’s probably a better idea xx

@Londonmummy66 I saw the Jolie Moi dress and really liked it until one of my sons said I’d look like Camilla in it 😒
Love the green velvet.
I think I need to go to John Lewis for some ideas.

(Thread derailment.) Curry wraps for a group of nicely dressed up people? That's either sadism or a total failure of imagination on somebody's part!

How about this one OP? Her dresses are v flattering on the tummy which is handy for me! katyawildman.com/products/new-in-3-4-sleeve-confident-in-old-masters-stretch-cotton