What does everyone think of grey hair?

[SilverDoublet]

Over the last 2 years I grew out my hair, it's quite grey but I just couldn't handle the regrowth reappearing every 3 weeks and didn't have time or money to deal with it. My hair was quite dark so I had been dying it dark brown. But now it's pure white in places, salt and pepper on top and still dark underneath. I asked a hair dresser if I should go blonde to hide regrowth but she said Im too dark. And I can't stand the regrowth with brunette. What do people think of grey? Or what does everyone else with hair like this do? I'm 45, don't like looking so old...

I normally notice cut before colour. If I do register the colour first then, with one or two exceptions, it's usually because there's something jarring about it e.g. a bad dye job. So my advice is to focus on seeking out a hairdresser who's an expert at cutting.

Edited cos I forgot to answer the question properly. My own hair's been grey for years, as you'd expect at 68. I like it. Grey on other people - I think I've answered that. For me it depends on cut/style.

I am with most men on this...if it's good enough for them not to give two hoots then it's good enough for me🤷‍♀️

Personally, I find the going blonde in middle age look to be far more ageing. Almost as bad as the unnatural monotone of a box dye. Everyone knows what you are trying to hide, it doesn't fool.

The reality is that most people in the 40s and onwards will be starting to go grey. Age is a privilege which is not afforded to all. We should be embracing it, not trying to hide it.

I'm 55 and have white (90%) and dark grey (10%) hair. I would not have let it grow out but for the fact that hair dye just stopped working on me at the menopause. Dark brown dye due came out as mid brown with undertones of white and then it faded within 2 weeks to a light orange brown and then to a blondy/orange colour that made me look utterly terrible.

I do think that the grey/white ages me, esp. when not close up (i.e. snap judgement from a distance), but the white/cool hair colour actually really suits me and is made better with wearing colour in clothes and having some make up on, as otherwise I feel a bit monochrome.
DD has advised that actually, the hair really suits me and also that with hindsight, my hair was 'younger' than I was, so she prefers this....I'm apparently now younger than my hair, which is a good thing!

So given under the colour, I must be about 60/40 grey/white to brown and blonde.

If I don’t dye it, what’s the solution to managing the frizzy mess? If I let the roots grow it looks like the love child of a badger and a wire brush.

Dying it seems to be keeping it a bit smoother these days.

Yeah I think dyeing it coats the hair and smoothes it out. I have wavy hair so it's prone to frizz anyway so I just douse it in curl creams and gels. I realise that wont work for everyone but my hair is really thick and takes a lot of product.

Yes! I'd much rather people see my hair and assume I'm old, then on looking closer realise I'm younger than they thought, than the other way round!

You could try a natural colour like henna?

I am firmly in the grey hair, don’t care camp. I don’t care if people think I look older.

I follow this woman who has grey hair, think it looks lovely and doesn’t make her look older

Love both yours @ShanghaiDiva and the one posted by @marmite2025.

I'd be happy to go grey like that but mine is all patchy.

Are you me?
I remember the day I realised that every other mum at a school production had dyed hair. It blew my mind, and - having being happily oblivious previously - suddenly started noticing how common it was. Cannot imagine spending that amount of time, money or energy thinking about what my hair looks like.

Whilst there are assumptions made of women with grey hair, personally I think hair dyed to cover the grays looks awful unless they go full on proper styled and coloured, which I rarely see amongst us ordinary folks. A lot of TV personalities achieve a good outcome, but they have the money to throw at it.

I’ve posted this pic lots before so apologies to anyone who has seen it too many times. I’m not the best at pictures hence using this one. I was 48.5 in this pic, I’m nearly 50 now and it’s the same.

I do think it depends on your hair type.. I’m really, really lucky because mine is soft and shiny still and is quite silvery, whereas some people’s is coarse and dry.

I don’t think I look any older than I am. Not that it would matter because I can’t dye anymore due to allergies. I also get far more compliements about it than I ever did when it was brown. And most are from younger people.

I always say to give it a go OP and if you don’t like you can always go back to the dye.

I'm 65. Naturally "wild rodent" or mouse brown.

I had highlights from the age of 16.
My hair is probably only 30 to 40% grey but it's very uneven - white at the front and salt and pepper further back. It is not a good look.

I have a light brown base and my hairdresser threads through blonde and caramel highlights so it looks quite fluid. This also prevents any hard lines because the all over shade is lighter than my natural one.

I have it done every 6 to 7 weeks. I am happy with it and that's what matters. I do not plan to go grey yet. My mother did at 75 and still has a few blonde highlights and a toner to lift it. She's 89.

Most people put me at late 50s.

I think grey hair in most cases looks a lot nicer than tinted hair, especially when it's dyed quite dark. It can jar then with the skin colour and look very unnatural and harsh.

I am 53 and still currently dye my hair (light brown then I paint some highlights on with a high life tint). I wish I could grow it out and I have tried a couple of times but always end up thinking that it ages me and the texture is fluffier.

I live somewhere a bit hippyish, so just about everyone goes grey naturally and it's sometimes quite jarring to see someone colouring away the grey. It's absolutely cultural the way we perceive grey as ageing, and I suspect the people who are adamant about this live in places or move in circles where dye is the norm, and where appearance matters in a different way.

My own grey is currently two cats whisker streaks of silvery white in long dark blonde hair, and I quite like them. I hope I end up that colour all over. I have no intention to dye it; I have far better things to spend my time and money on, and men aren't expected to fret about their grey so I refuse to propogate a norm so patently misogynistic.

It's interesting the way some women are talking about other women's appearances on this thread. Why are some women so ashamed about ageing they are trying to shame other women too? Internalised misogyny is insidious and patriarchy would have us believe there is nothing worse than a woman who is old. Fuck that shit.

I love yours too @GreyRooted. so shiny.

I really think it depends on several things : the hair type, the shade of grey/silver, the cut and the person’s overall clothing and style.

I have two friends in their 50s who have done fully silver in recent years. One has short hair, usually styled with a quiff, and wears quite edgy clothes and often wears bright lipstick. She looks amazing and the change to fully silver didn’t really change her.

The other has straight, shoulder-length hair and is much softer/casual in her clothing and makeup and I honestly think going grey aged her. I’d never say it to her but I often think she’d look more vibrant and alive with bright lipstick or more styled hair. Love them both and they’re wonderful women but on appearance alone that’s my honest opinion

I laughed at that too. Presumably because SIL apparently looks 30 despite being 55 which is quite clearly rubbish. Even Jennifer Lopez doesn't look 30. 🤣

Was going to write a similar thing. Choice between orange ish hair for two weeks a month , the first two weeks after a colour being ok or grey but the same grey all month.

so to this saying grey looks awful, I hate being grey but I also hate the alternative. Mine is very grey but where it’s not grey it’s black so putting blonde streaks in would look odd.

I’ve just been looking at a photo of me with make and female friends. One male friend colours his hair , one female friend does then one is very blonde so occasionally puts a colour in it. I am hyper critical and don’t like my face or hair but I’m not sure I look markedly older than everyone else on that photo. But perhaps I’m kidding myself? But I don’t usually do that and as I say I hate my grey hair so I’m not trying to convince myself.

I was happy with my hair colour when it was light brown and am just as happy with it now it’s almost completely grey. I don’t think it ages people, particularly when it’s in good condition. I would never consider dying it back to its original colour, and have only ever dyed my hair once, when I was 17, but having seen another thread on here a couple of weeks ago, I’m tempted to add some purple or turquoise highlights.

Grey hair was popular for a while during and just after Covid. Thankfully that time has long passed. It doesn't look great on the vast majority of people.

Thankfully?