What does everyone think of grey hair?

[SilverDoublet]

Over the last 2 years I grew out my hair, it's quite grey but I just couldn't handle the regrowth reappearing every 3 weeks and didn't have time or money to deal with it. My hair was quite dark so I had been dying it dark brown. But now it's pure white in places, salt and pepper on top and still dark underneath. I asked a hair dresser if I should go blonde to hide regrowth but she said Im too dark. And I can't stand the regrowth with brunette. What do people think of grey? Or what does everyone else with hair like this do? I'm 45, don't like looking so old...

Very few people look better with it, than a colour. Example George Clooney looks great with it. It’s not going to sound great when I say this but I think men can get away with it more than women. That is they can look good. Silver fox if you like.

I don’t know a woman with grey hair who looks better with it than their dyed hair they had before.

Yes but you’re not comparing them either someone else. You’re comparing what they look like, as if they had 2 images side by side, one grey hair, one dyed. Putting aside the hassle of regular dying, the woman is likely to look better and younger with the dyed hair.

Sorry responded to wrong comment.

Grey hair does not look flattering on the majority of women.

Of course women are perfectly entitled to choose not to colour their hair but there is no doubt that it will immediately age most of them.

As long as you get the right colour, not look too dark or too harsh, I think it is definitely worth doing.

What about men? Is grey hair flattering on the majority of men?
@summerskyblue
should they also colour their hair?

I was dark brunette. I got my first grey hairs at about 22. I started colouring it and spent fortunes keeping up to the roots . In Covid I decided to grow it out . It was painful but when it had gone I had caramel coloured highlights as I wasn’t ready to be completely grey. I absolutely love it . I have had lots of compliments and I don’t worry about obvious roots now .

Men get to be silver foxes. Only women get to be judged and found 'ageing' for not dying their hair.
Men get gravitas from going grey. Women get societal disapproval.

My take on grey hair is that many women try it out because as PP have said yiu get fed up by late 40s or early 50s of constantly touching roots up. So grow it out and all good. Except it’s v rare it does look good or doesn’t leave you looking older. I’ve come ti the conclusion that it only looks good if you can afford to get it properly treated and maintained so it’s a sort of brighter vibrant grey/white and also kept very well maintained so it always looks sharp and styled. Also, it helps if you make yourself up lightly in flattering colours so you don’t get washed out and there’s a bit of contrast and sparkle in your face!

But who’s got the money and time - that’s the whole reason for trying the not so successful always grey route! 😭 It’s like that saying, we’re not ugly just poor! 😅

My mum stopped dyeing her hair when I refused to dye my grey hair. I'm in my 50s and she's in her 70s. Her grey is the sort of grey that people pay money for. She looks fab. My grey hair is very wiry, mostly a mix of salt and pepper (black and grey), but with a thick white streak at the front. My grey hair needs more work to keep it in top condition, but I really like it - it's shiny and I love the way the light bounces off it.

@SilverDoublet I'm not sure about the colour, but it's worth spending a bit more on a really good cut and conditioning it.

exactly!

Nothing illustrates some women's internalised misogyny more clearly than a grey hair thread. It's actually kind of fascinating.

I think it looks awful, personally. Well, very aging I should say.

It's kind of true though, men kind of do get away with grey hair more than women. No matter how we might hate it, men suit grey hair/strips of grey hair, better than women. Like men can get away with shagging lots of women, and just be a 'player' or a 'bit of a lad.' Women get called slag, slut, tramp, all sorts if they behave the same. Mostly by other women. Women are judged WAY more.

As has been said, the majority of women will NOT look better if they let the grey hair grow through, and also (as has been said,) most women don't end up with that sharp bright grey colour all over. (And even that only looks good on some women.) Most women when they're 'going grey' have bits here and there, and streaks and stripes, and it looks a mess, and like they don't care about how they look.

As I said earlier, I am around 12-15% grey, sort of around the temples/sides. NOTHING at the back or on top. (I have shoulder length hair.) No way am I going to let it keep growing through with silvery strips growing through when 85% or more of my hair is light brown/dark blonde. It would look bloody awful!

As long as I have so little grey, I am not going to 'embrace the grey!' I may even keep colouring the few bits of grey forever, as my dad and grandfather only ever went partly grey. (Even by their 80s...) So if this happens to me, I will never 'embrace the grey.' Not as long as I have 80% or more of my natural colour. Do some people think I should let the grey streaks and strips grow through, and have my hair look a mess, because it's 'internalised misogyny' to dye it. ???! Do me a favour!🙄

Stop adding to the misogyny of it then, by saying women don't suit it, women can't get away with it etc.
Dye it, don't dye it your choice. Just stop saying that women who choose not to look older. You are part of the problem but too blind to see it. e.g. saying women look a mess if they don't grey evenly all over. Judging women on their appearance. If those women are happy with how they look, it is none of your business.

I don’t like it personally. Some women can pull it off (usually blonde women because it’s closer to their natural hair colour), but on most people it’s very aging.

I don’t see how you can be too dark to go blonde. My hair is dark, but it still goes platinum white with bleach when I get a balayage (not that I would want it that colour all over as it wouldn’t suit me).

I'll say what I like thanks. I don't need to take advice or orders from you - or anyone else. I stick by what I say, and if I'm 'part of the problem,' I'm OK with that. I'm entitled to my views.

Not all men suit grey hair either imo (depends on skin tone), and almost all look better with their original colour.

Exactly. It looks such a mess when strips and streaks of grey are growing through, and much of the hair is still brown. And yes it is ageing... As you say it looks worse when the natural colour is darker. Very few women (as some others have said too,) will go completely 100% grey, and have that 'bright grey all over' look. In fact, the more I see women like this, the more I wonder if they've dyed it all grey. (to match the 40-60% that is actually grey...) I'm sure some will be 100% grey, but very likely not til they are 60-65 or older.

You can be too dark to go blonde if you are not white! I would look ridiculous with brown skin and blonde hair.

Why are you continually saying "looks a mess"? Unless you have personally seen every single grey haired woman on the planet, how can you make this judgement? Or does the "looks a mess" refer to yourself?

I’m 60 and by the grey at the sides coming through before my monthly cut( I have a soft pixie) I’d look like a corpse I’ve gone a slightly darker colour from reddish to copper ish to blend them in better
well groomed hair and brows are an essential as I have small sharp features.

I don’t think it’s always aging. Maybe I’m deluded but I think I look the same age

Mine is stripy and I really don’t think it particularly ages me 🤷🏻‍♀️

I must be deluded too, I'm 56 and don't think it ages me 🤷 I don't mind looking my age or a few years older.

I really think it depends. I have reddish hair which is now probably about 4/5 grey, but most people think I've gone or am going blonde. I would say it suits my skin better than the red dye which matched my 20s hair and is now too dark for my skin. I would say it does make me look my age where previously I was usually taken to be a bit younger, but you're going to look your age at some point and I don't think that means I'm suddenly not attractive.