reaclassification of MN sterotypes

[FluffyMummy123]

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unbelievable what some people say

can they hear themselves

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mr and mrs attached sometimes arrive on playdates together at my house, smiling lovingly at each other.

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alpha dad with something to hide

Is very short from carrying enormous chip on shoulder presumably

turns up with trainers and football and makes big thing of hanging around conspiuously when everyone is leaving, to play football with jnr.

Talks easily to other mums

BUT

nobody has seen the quiet wifey for at least a term

When they started they did school run together but she never spoke

"dizzy mum"

always late for parties/brownie events/dance rehearsals

turns up on the wrong day/wrong location

rings me and asks "did you notice if my DD had her swimming kit at school today?"

leaves toher people's DC at dancing as forgot to collect

sends 6 year old DD to a party in a velvet pantsuit so she was Looked At

ohhh yes, I know her!

mum who really should get a job
On every comittee following her children through from playgroup to chair of PTA.

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Older, weary mum who had kids in the nick of time and the kids have further aged her. Grey, exhausted and badly dressed.

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when do we all confess what mum type we think we are (I notice cod already has....)? Am worried I might be dizzy mum (minus the velvet pantsuit for dd....), but she sounds MUCH more annoying than me....

alpha dad also has personalised number plate
runs own bsiness and wants son to be like him (but son will never beat dad at own game - or footie)

Suspect wifey is left at home in case she might make friends at pick up.

I am dizzy mum. Except for the velvet pantsuit.

dull mum

Can only talk about her children
Wears semi yummy clothes but dull ones
is slim but not skinny
wears sensible (but smart) shoes if it is raining
Children always well turned out but not excessively so
If you get invited for dinner it is always pasta and never more than half a bottle of wine per head yet they sit at the table grimly til 12.30am so as not to appear dull

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Cod I really have suspicions but what can I do?

I just hate him silently atm and make polite conversation.

Oh, and don't forget Martyr Mum.

Dowdy clothes, permanently harassed but saintly expression. Sighs constantly about never having a moment to herself but then always says, with a little self-deprecating shrug, 'Of course, I wouldn't have it any other way.'

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I have to confess that DH and I have done the school run together about 3 times but that was when I felt I had to do it, and he was off work that day. Now, if he is off, he does it alone while I get on at home.

I am Way Too Closely Involved In School and Should Really Get a Proper Job Mum.

Sleazy BIL/Uncle

Is regarded as 'funny' or 'very clever' by ILs
Good job
Attractive wife
Makes jokes about your body shape, other inappropriate comments

Just me then?

I've been most of these mums during my 35 years of mumdom

Now I'm You'll-get-over-it Mum

ie. When people tell me that their child has fallen out with another child and its sooooo awful

I find it very hard not to look bored and usually change the subject to talk about the weather (much more interesting)

Time warp mum

is wearing same clothes from before she had children, even though she is now 2 stone heavier

this one annoys me as I know a time warp mum who is stunning but looks bloody awful squeezed into wrong size clothes

mug mum

is so keen for dc to find friends in new school that she all too easy prey for the 'play date poncer'