reaclassification of MN sterotypes

[FluffyMummy123]

Message withdrawn

[triflenorks]

no, sorry duchess! It was a joke I made on OJ's thread about trifle. I thought it would make good name.

[ipanemagirl]

you mean you have never been the Duchess of NOrks Bride?

[triflenorks]

ipanemagirl, yes I am serial name changer, but I have never been duchess.

[ipanemagirl]

Yeah, kitbit, I respect her too, I always think of her as "Born to be a Mother". Just never losing it with impatience like Glen Close in fatal attraction
(how I see myself on occasion in terms of lack of patience with poor ds!!)

[kitbit]

comfy mum

The sort who looks like she gives great hugs, probably can turn her hand to a bit of baking but is no stranger to Mr Kipling, has a few finger paints around for rainy days and always remembers people's birthdays. Wears the sort of easy smile that the rest of us would love to have and is always genuinely pleased to see everyone. Usually wears jeans and a T shirt and is surrounded by everyone else's kids at pickup time asking to come round to play.

We have a mum like this at school, she is just lovely. of all the types I wish I could be like this one!!!

[ipanemagirl]

I agree Ingles, I have one of those, always going on about how well dh is doing at work etc it's really grim.

[ingles2]

Top trump Mum
because my dc's can do better than yours and so can my dp...infact so can I
and I'll tell you at every opportunity.

[ipanemagirl]

LOL kitbit at softplay types!!!!

triflenorks are you a name-changed Duchess (stands up and curtseys?)

Antdamn
LOL LOL LOL at only woman ever to be pg! We have one at ds's school who is an inveterate moaner, she's so tired, has so much work on and on and on and on. She moaned like this from 4 weeks onwards!

Not that I'm unsympathetic but many of us feel so lucky to be pregnant that exclusively moaning about it does seem a little ungrateful!!

[HaventSleptForAYear]

Tough Dad - plays really rough games with little boys and then says "come on, stop being such a baby/girl" when they cry.

[Anna8888]

Foreign Mums Club (I'm in Paris) - use drop off/pick up as an opportunity to bitch let off steam about French MILs

[triflenorks]

The-baby-machine she has 5 kids and is only 21. looks slightly harrased but has a gorgeous figure. I am in awe of 'our' baby machine. She might only be 21, but she is half way through her Batchelor degree and is still with the father of all of them. She was 17 when she had the eldest, at 18 she had twins, and twins agian at 19 and they are all boys. And she has a lovely figure.

[kitbit]

we have

Bug-Eyed-Mum
Wears sunglasses so big they have almost morphed into one large lens that covers her entire face. Usually worn with skinny jeans and bling. Has different handbag every day and slides eyes around behind glasses to see who is looking at her (you can just see her eyebrows moving)

soft play mum 1
Comments loudly on how adventurous and daring her little cherub is while standing with her back to the play area where little cherub is pulling the arms off some poor 5 year old

soft play mum 2
Dumps monster child and leaves to go shopping/have a fag/get a coffee/have some me time while child vents all energy in the park by pulling the arms off some poor 5 year old

soft play mum 3
Goes to soft play park wearing a worried expression and snug fit stretchy clothing that won't catch on the corners as she crawls at warp speed through the padded maze hot on the heels of Little Darling aged 7. Justifies this by remembering the one time when Little Darling was 18 months old and after a frantic dash she found herself holding him by the ankles as he dangled down the firemans pole hole. Carries a dedicated pair of socks in her handbag so that she can definitely be allowed in.

[ssd]

I had a bad sleep and can't be arsed talking mum

thats me

[Antdamm]

How about 'The only woman to ever be pregnant' mum to be.

She appears to have all the symptoms of a heavily pregnant woman - tiredness, constant need to pee at all hours of the day, constant feeling of sickness (even though she has never been sick yet) and an overwhelming need to "nest" not to mntion utting on nearly a stone in weight

And she is only 8weeks gone.

Just wait tll shes twenty five weeks gone and can no longer bend down to tie laces, shave legs, pull up socks etc etc then she can complain

Acting like shes the only person in the world who has ever experienced pregnancy. And worse ye, is one of the mums who think she still fits in her size 12 (pretends they are size 10) jeans, with rolls of bulge everwhere, its not nice.

[Anna8888]

Husband-Hunting Mum was at our school gate this morning at 8.55 am in navel-depth cleavage, 10cm heels and full Barbie hair-and-makeup

[triflenorks]

my kids are miss understood mum
three kids who are perfect, she does nothing but tell you how perfect they are and even when you ask how her family are she never asks after yours.
Her dd1 is 15 and is never at school, she has been found flaked out on the football field with a bottle of Jack Daniels beside her on numerous occasions, she sleeps with any male with a pulse and has a high IQ and is failing at school but its the teachers fault.
ds is 13 and can't ride a bike because his parents haven't bothered to teach him. he has a high IQ and is never at school therefor he is failing but its his teachers fault.
dd2 high IQ never at school again failing but its the schools fault.
parents both went to a grammar school and have high IQ's but it was the schools fault that they failed at school and have NEVER worked.
I had to cut of the friendship in the end, because she permanently gave me a head ache.

[LissyD]

Worrying rash mum

Constantly stripping off her child to show you a tiny spot and ask if you think its deadly

[Quattrocento]

Stressed, guilty and paranoid Mum

She drops the children off at the dot of 8.30 and RUNS to her car to do join a conference call breathless and late - hoping no-one thinks her antisocial but knowing that there are mothers and minders at the gates JUDGING

[theAfkaUrbanDryad]

Far Too Many Pockets Mum

Spends 5 minutes looking through the pockets of her cargo jeans for car keys/phone/£20 note that she knows she just put in there.

[ssd]

sex life mum

always going on about her great sex life "oh guess what we did last for hours"

when you can barely remember the last time your dh looked at you...........

then you can't look her dh in the eye without wanting to boak

[kaphc]

ipanemagirl, I'm sure you were a fab parent helper, wish ours at my daughter's school were like you!!!

[cocolepew]

PTA Mum - always trying to get you to help in the school fashion show/fete/Christmas/craft fair/outings/dinner duty. Very loud , describes herself as 'bubbly', calls the Head by their first name all the time.