All my clothes look horrific on - massive out of proportion stomach

[Doublebubblegum]

Help!

I'm 41 and a size 14. Was a size 10-12 right up to about two years ago and now seem to be putting on weight very easily. I'm not too bothered by this but all the weight is going onto my stomach.

I've always had a slight belly but it's now got completely ridiculous. It's so out of proportion to the rest of me that about 90% of the clothes in my wardrobe now look awful on me.

To all others with out of proportion stomachs - what do you wear that is flattering? I think it makes It worse that I'm a sort of lopsided hourglass shape. Big boobs, big hips but small waist. Then BAM under my waist is this protruding stomach. I used to wear things to accentuate my waist (so for work I'd wear belted wide leg trousers with a shirt tucked in) but anything that accentuates my waist now just draws attention to my tummy.

I can no longer wear high waisted wide leg trousers/jeans (although I love the look of these! But just pull across my stomach and highlight this area). Mom jeans, skinny jeans etc are also out too. Anything with a drawstring waist just adds bulk to me.

In the summer I managed to find a couple of summer dresses that skimmed over the stomach area but now it's getting colder I've completely lost my way and have no idea what suits me any more. All the fitted/knitted dresses just look silly on me.

Please help!
(I know I should really look to find a way to lose this weight but honestly I don't have the energy right now. And I'm not really bothered about the extra weight, it's just the fact it's all going to one place! If it was fairly distributed I'd be fine 🤣)

Following with interest. I'm 54 and the same weight as I always was, but my belly is just getting bigger and bigger. I'm pretty slim overall but I've never had a slim waist, so never been able to wear waisted skirts or dresses without looking pregnant. For me, I think this belly fat expansion thing is to do with age/hormones, but I don't like it at all. I went on holiday with my (admittedly superfit) sister and she has no fat on her belly at all, but instead tends to put on weight on her bum and legs. It makes no sense (though I probably should cut back on alcohol and crisps).

Agree that Phase 8 tops/batwing dresses are amazing for those of us with bigger bellies

For me giving up alcohol has given me a much flatter (although not flat) stomach and I find it way easier to dress now. Overall I haven't lost weight but my shape has definitely changed. It took a few months.

High waisted and wide leg trousers are worth trying OP.

Tesco Body shaper full briefs are my secret to a flatter tummy...

I also love my Uniqlo pinstripe trousers.

Side zips are useful as are things without pockets. If you've a small chest band size, I would look at dresses that have their smallest point there. The combo of big boobs with it being cinched underneath means it sort of flows over your tummy area whilst the focus is on your amazing boobs. Don't buy anything too high cut or shapeless as it'll just make you look wider.

Hiya. I follow Lottie Drynan on insta and she’s fab. (Although she’s a bit younger than I am but whatever 😂) She has IBS and dresses for comfort and in bloat friendly outfits but with good looks and style advice.

Also second Halara jeans being totally amazing - really comfy and flattering just looking for another pair.

Find a mid length body con dress that shows a bit of cleavage and pair with a colourful blazer. I've got a fairly cheap dress from asos or Boohoo and a mustard blazer from sainsbury I think and it looks great. Also anything in a jersey ideally in a wrap style. Joe blogs usually have some good ones or next x

To be on safe side get checked out by a doctor

I follow a woman on y tube called "I'm just me Marleen". I don't know her at all just found her really helpful as she gives loads of great tips for an apple shape. I'm getting the courage to tuck in and wear a belt like she recommends. It's hard to let go of wanting to just wear baggy things but they don't do us any favours so. HTH

I am not that huge either but my stomach is like a barrel - no waist . Seriously - try on maternity tops / dresses …they will not make you look pregnant but have so much extra space around the stomach area they are flattering !

HRTWT. I remember Sarah Lancashire coping with her tummy in Last Tango in Halifax - she'd wear a loose cotton shirt that covered her tum and then wear a tailored jacket on the top with a nipped-in waist (unbuttoned!) that gave her a good shape.

If you ever wear jeans, buy a good quality pair of high waisted ones. I've just bought a pair of Hush skinny bootleg high wasted. So comfortable and really slimming and flattering.

It was well worth trying a variety of 7 different makes, to find the best cut/very flattering ones. The others made me look huge and dumpy.

Try low carbing for a bit. it helped me (menopause belly isues)

I've already posted but I think you just need to spend a bit of time investing in yourself and what works for you and build on it. As an example I only ever wear levi jeans. I've thrown out all my marks and Spencer ones, my new look ones, my asos ones. Tbh I pick up my levi jeans on amazon now for £30/£40, cheaper than I've paid in all those other places tbh.

I think you said in your original post about liking a couple of dresses, actively try on dresses and see how you feel .

Look at pictures of yourself, what do think you look best in? What made you feel good about that outfit? I hate looking at pictures of myself 😕 but it does help me to identify what is right or wrong on my body, what colours help me etc.

Hi, read your post and it is exactly my story word for word. Finally went to the doctor for advice and was sent for an ultrasound. Turns out I had an 11cm cyst on my ovary and operation in a week's time.
Might be worth getting yours checked. Good Luck x

I have got a massive stomach and not big boobs - which I think is worse in some ways as my belly protrudes way more than my chest! But wide trousers and a top tucked in still works for me - IF they're the right trousers. I've recently got some very flattering wide legged jeans and black trousers from M&S.

Shapewear does nothing for me, as my large stomach is made worse due to broken muscles.

Also worth a follow on Insta is Veronica_freund87 - she's American so can't often buy the things she shares but I like looking at what she wears.

I was like that for a while, belly always seemed very round and bloated, out of proportion with the rest of me.
After a few years I was also struggling badly with fatigue so I went to my GP and she found i was coeliac. Going gluten free has reduced my stomach a lot, i still have a bit of excess flab over my section scar but the rounded Ness has gone, i no longer look like I'm 6 months pregnant most of the time!!

Ah it sounds like the onset of the dreaded 'meno-belly' (I 'might' have made that up). I got exactly the same at around the same age (in fact I could have written this post), and it was the drop in oestrogen that caused it as I was hitting perimenopause. I also struggle with what suits and what doesn't. I do love a good shirt dress or a wrap dress nowadays and can't wear skinny jeans for very long anymore or anything that requires a belt. Dresses or trousers with shirred waists are both super flattering and comfortable and very on trend at the moment. When I'm not at work I live in harem pants as the wider draping around the belly and hips is flattering too and fit nicely around the waist giving a nice shape.

I have exactly the same problem. A few things have made me feel better and more confident. Trying next Size up. A personal shopper at John Lewis. Chose some amazing outfits for me in the correct size!! Flat fronted trouser, shirt or jumper tucked in and jumpsuit are things that have worked. I have found a dance class I love to try to at least stop the weight gain. Hope you find something that helps.

After having my second baby, my diastasis rectii stomach makes me look at least six months pregnant! I mainly wear mini smock dresses, especially in a heavy material like cord or heavy cotton. They skim over everything and are so comfy.

I have found my people! This thread is great.

Hi, This is exactly what I've been needing...I am pear-shaped with a giant Kardashian booty. Always had a flat stomach...until the menopause.
Will you please share with me the type of business that offers the service to find the kind of clothes that look best? I am in Southern California, the home of Vanity, herself, so I'd imagine that this service exists round here, but just don't know where to look. Thanks!

I’ve sent you a PM with the website of the person I use so you can see what she says. Might be a good starting point to get some search ideas. She calls herself a stylist, I thought she would select really expensive items for me but she chooses everyday reasonably priced clothes in colours, shape and style that suit my body and personality.

#moonriverdancing please could you send me the link as well? I'm on medication that causes abdominal weight gain and following some spinal compression fractures my shape has completely changed and my self esteem is at rock bottom because of my new shape. Any assistance gratefully received as I'm looking like a Winnie the pooh shape (but not as cute!). Thank you so much

Thank you @buffyspikefaith for recommending the Hollister trousers to the OP. I also have a huge stomach and ordered the trousers (and 3 jumpers) and they are very flattering and comfy. I might even order another pair!