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Advice on what to wear for night out for dinner and a cocktail with friend

14 replies

Easipeelerie · 29/09/2024 10:11

I’m 54 and like the idea of looking good but never seem to quite get it right. My friend who I’m meeting is tallish and regular shaped and will wear something from Shein e.g an all in one jumpsuit, and look great. She certainly won’t judge, but I’ll feel sartorially in her shadow.

I’ve had my colours done and am a true spring so suit warm colours like lime, coral, yellow and neutrals like some navys, warm browns, beiges and cream. I’ve stopped wearing black and grey. If you know about Kibbe body shapes, I’d say I’m closest to flamboyant or soft gamine - large head, hips and feet but small waist and small angular shoulders. I can bizarrely range from size 6 to size 14 but generally I wear size 8 tops and size 10 trousers. I am 5ft 3, short waisted, barrel chested (and have only one boob due to mastectomy), have cankles and stout calves (so can’t benefit much from showing off my relatively longer legs. My upper half suits petite clothes but my lower half is just into regular, but not for all brands. I look better with slash necks or deep Vs. I prefer stretchier fabrics because of my bingo wings.

To play it safe on a night out, my go to outfit has been very dark skinny jeans and a ‘going out’ top with a black leather jacket and stiletto heels. I feel safe like this as these clothes aren’t wearing me. But I’m conscious that I’m an old fashioned cliche. I really want to do the all neutrals from Cos thing but everything in Cos wears me because of my height and shape. And, the zingy warm colours that I suit just aren’t in these sorts of shops, certainly not in autumn.

So - I would love if someone could help me look up to date and sophisticated in a night out with a friend, with all of the above going on.

Thanks for reading.

OP posts:
Easipeelerie · 29/09/2024 10:14

And to add, I look like a clown in ruched shoulders and don’t suit raglan sleeves. I suit a plain ‘set in’ sleeve which you often find in your basics but less often in something I’d wear out.

OP posts:
IHaveNeverLivedintheCastle · 29/09/2024 11:01

Goodness me. There's a lot of information there most of which isn't remotely useful for picking an outfit.

For starters I'm sure your friend is a lovely person but a Shein jumpsuit won't sartorially overshadow anyone.

Secondly-i know a lot about clothes. I'm a very confident dresser and get loads of compliments about my clothes. But I know absolutely nothing and care even less about "getting my colours done," kibbe body shapes". From what I've read about them on here they sound nothing more than mumbo jumbo control mechanisms to limit women's choices and make them feel bad about themselves by focusing on perceived flaws.

Thirdly , I don't at the moment wear Cos but I'm 5'3". I never had any issues wearing Cos.

Fourthly , what do you like, (as well as Cos which you've managed to convince yourself you can't wear) as opposed to all the things you don't like? Do you want separates/ dresses?

Fifthly - budget?

Alicana · 29/09/2024 11:13

I’m 160cms too and I live in Cos! I don’t wear trousers so I can comment on that, but everything else fits well and doesn’t swamp me.

I also have no faith in ‘colours’, yes some colours can look better on you, but life is too short to rule out the spectrum!

high waisted trousers/long skirts with top tucked in could suit you as you have a small waist and emphasise your longer bottom half without showing off your legs if they are a problem area for you.

kdramaqueen · 29/09/2024 11:18

I'm a short 12P and never thought I would ever wear an ankle skimming jumpsuit but I bought the no pockets version of this yesterday, in the Next sale. Styled with leopard skin stilettoes and a long dark leopard print scarf tied in a bow at the neck, it hits two trends - the return of high heels (yes!) and leopard print as a neutral😉

A jumpsuit top like this disguises any discrepancy between top and bottom sizes so don't rule out a jumpsuit.

Lentilweaver · 29/09/2024 11:19

I agree with @IHaveNeverLivedintheCastle. You seem a bit trapped in a prison of your own making. I have never looked at someone and thought " wow look at her wearing colours suited for a warm spring when she is actually a cool winter". Life is too short to rule so much out.

IHaveNeverLivedintheCastle · 29/09/2024 11:29

kdramaqueen · 29/09/2024 11:18

I'm a short 12P and never thought I would ever wear an ankle skimming jumpsuit but I bought the no pockets version of this yesterday, in the Next sale. Styled with leopard skin stilettoes and a long dark leopard print scarf tied in a bow at the neck, it hits two trends - the return of high heels (yes!) and leopard print as a neutral😉

A jumpsuit top like this disguises any discrepancy between top and bottom sizes so don't rule out a jumpsuit.

That's the right attitude. "Yay, I like look of this, I'll go for it." Jumpsuits aren't something I wear but I like the look of that one and what you're going to wear with it is spot on and would be great for going out.

CapaciousHag · 29/09/2024 11:36

Oh my! @IHaveNeverLivedintheCastle and succeeding posters have said exactly what I wanted to say. I’ve never in my life seen such a litany of … honestly, I don’t know what.

@Easipeelerie this just isn’t the way to approach clothes shopping. No one looks at you in the way you’re seeing yourself.

Easipeelerie · 29/09/2024 11:38

Thanks for useful tips Alicana and Kdramaqueen.

OP posts:
FGSWhatNow · 29/09/2024 11:44

Some of the responses are a little harsh! The OP has provided what she thought was helpful information, probably because of the usual S&B posts where the extent of the opening post is "I need a going out dress, anyone got any ideas?"

Pavolvaa · 29/09/2024 11:46

Satin skirt in petite range, tight fitted t shirt leather jacket and heels ?

petite range jumpsuit?

long sleeve midi dress - M&S petite ?

Aroastdinnerisnotahumanright · 29/09/2024 11:52

Wider leg jeans or trousers and chunkier shoes (can still have a heel) with your existing tops and jacket.

Illpickthatup · 29/09/2024 12:16

I'd go for a nice pair of high waisted wide leg trousers with a nice blouse tucked in or a dress with some knee high boots if you don't like your lower legs.

Illpickthatup · 29/09/2024 12:27

Some ideas that might suit.

Advice on what to wear for night out for dinner and a cocktail with friend
Advice on what to wear for night out for dinner and a cocktail with friend
Advice on what to wear for night out for dinner and a cocktail with friend
Easipeelerie · 29/09/2024 12:30

Thanks everyone for some really helpful tips.I have started to go for wider leg trousers lately and I think they look quite good.

OP posts:
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