I'm a terrible person

[GlitteringUnicorn]

So not for the first time I saw someone today wearing something I also own..
A dress
One of my favourites
Cool, comfortable and classic I thought- a summer staple
But they looked awful in it

I have come home and put it in the charity bag. I can't unsee it! But now feel a terrible judgey person but can't get over it.

Is anyone else also this loathsome?

To be fair if Helen Mirren picked up something I had been considering I’d ditch it. She’s gorgeous and glamorous, and her style is so different to mine I would realise those biker boots aren’t for me 🤣

Taylor Swift managed to increase hugely the sales of a dress by a small Scottish brand when she wore it. I understand that.

I don't understand however the mindset of how Matt Hancock and Rishi Sunak ruined a particular style of trainers so they can't ever be worn. If I had the same pair, I'd just think well they've got good taste.

I would not even think about doing such a thing. I wear what I know I look good in. I am not going to compare myself to anybody else, because quite simply, they are not me. I am very petite, and know what works for me.

Brilliant this must be one of the only benefits of being very short and fat. I've only ever experienced this the other way around where I'm plodding along in my size 20 short version of a new dress self consciously worrying about how I look and spot another woman in it in their size 10 tall version and think ah wow my dress is more stylish than I thought. As long as I don't look in a mirror I'll feel good wearing it after that. Sorry to hear that the other woman went home and burned her dress though 😂

That's such a positive attitude.

I don't think there's anything terrible going on here. I love people-watching, including clothes-watching, with one of my two uni age girls and we love spotting stylish looking people, and commenting favourably on stuff, people of all ages. We don't comment negatively as that would spoil it, but, also I do see a range of styles and sometimes I just realise that a style doesn't come over how I'd want to come over, and I mentally note that and don't wear it.

I don't wear floral midi-dresses or indeed any patterned dresses almost ever, it's not a style that I think flatters me and I don't think it flatters that many people, but I know everyone will say they weren't intending to look nice anyway...I do love dresses, just not that particular style and the way it is worn.

I love all the young people's styles at the moment, denim shorts and lycra tops, but I'm not going to copy them, that's their look, it's their moment, it's not for middle-aged me.

Watching other people, how they dress, how that reads to me and others is surely part of social life, especially for those interested in Style and Beauty, sometimes our thoughts are negative, sometimes positive. I also notice people who have an inner glow which is rarely to do with their clothes, one of my friends has this at the moment, just looks so healthy and buoyant in middle-age, it's a vibe.

I like the dress @IHaveNeverLivedintheCastle has been wearing, it wouldn't suit me whatsoever (in size/colouring), but it's a statement dress (to me) and not surprising people have been commenting on it, it's unusual and striking.

Op, did you bin your dress because you thought you would look awful in it too?

Or did you bin it purely because you thought the other woman looked awful in it?

And that you look good in it?

If the latter then binning the dress was daft.

I hope to be never so influenced by other people.

@ConflictofInterest excellent!

Also an older woman and apologising for being out in the first place. Perhaps we could have designated hours so we don't inflict ourselves on people.

Or just go out after dark?
Isn’t it depressing that some women are still as ageist as ever and don’t miss any opportunities to knock older women?

I was 5 stone overweight for a while and hated myself for it. When shops started using overweight models in their listings it would immediately put me off because I thought the outfit would make me look fat. Even though I was fat.

Entirely on me and my poor body image.

Haha similar here but Gail Tilsley. My MIL had bought me a Next fleece which I spotted on Gail. Maybe similar to your thought process, I thought this isn't happen chance...Wardrobe looked at it and thought "Yes! This is so Gail!"

I suppose I am an ‘older woman’ these days (not in my thirties any more, lol). I don’t think of myself in those terms though which maybe influences what I wear - I wear what I like and suits me, and give no fucks. I don’t recall seeing someone in the same dress as me - which must happen now and again - so I am genuinely intrigued as to what I would do. If it happens I will report back, lol. BTW @IHaveNeverLivedintheCastle, I love that dress - I have a similar one with a similar print. It’s awesome when someone compliments what you are wearing.

Oh it’s gorgeous, the colour and the print too!

Theresa May and I had the same cropped, double breasted, red boiled wool jacket from Hobbs.

In the early to mid 1990s Norma Major and I had the same long line jacket tailored crepe wool suit from Windsmoor.

Queen Camilla and I both have this green lace dress from Edina Ronay. It came in navy as well. I have it in navy too.

They're all older than me.

Photo of dress

When younger I had a favourite top from Principles. Then one day Liz MacDonald was wearing it on Coronation Street. She was much older than me and her character’s a bit “common” as my mum would say. Never wore it again.

Edit to say that I didn’t realise that Corrie had already been referenced upthread when I posted this. It is obviously the place where style goes to die

You are being a bit over dramatic. Just because she looked awful in it (she’s not even the same size as you) doesn’t mean you do. Of course it’s going to look much nicer on a slim tall person, most things tend too.

Your getting rid of a dress because someone who looks nothing like you looked bad in it? That is a bit odd tbh.

I stopped wearing converse after I saw Theresa May wearing them. She looked so old, ridiculous and frumpy. I couldn't ever feel good in them again.

I get it.

I’m the older woman so I don’t care anymore, I wear what I like. Having said that there are some outfits I consider ageing. I’ve recently browsed Sézane with my 83 year old mother and we both think their floral print tops are frumpy (and we both share the love for floral prints)

I used to be a manager in a care home, I was in my early thirties and turned up one day to see one of the residents who was early 70,s wearing the same top.

Mine went to charity and the resident never wore hers again

Mumsnet is becoming such a tedious predictable place. Every other thread I open is guaranteed to contain a form of "AIBU to despise fat / old / benefits claimants / trans people ". It really is turning into GB news/Daily Mail fodder. After over 20 years of using this site I am finally out.