Gender Non-Conforming wardrobe...but still aesthetic?

[EverybodyJumpsuit]

I need a thread of things that fit this style-

Two years ago I decided never to wear a dress or skirt again, which has actually been delightful. Also heels. IN THE BIN.

I'm very gender non-confirming, but havent translated that well into my clothes, and so had ended up super alienated from a lot of fashion, since huge amounts seems to be to be about playing up a version of woman-hood that I just don't belong in (looking at you instagram shiny face tit pout land). I want to look like the opposite of a Kardashian or one of the selling sunset broads.

For years I've lived in black mom jeans, boxy tees and mens jumpers, brogues, DM's, trainers, which is fine but very boring. But I actually love extreme dressing- Tilda Swinton and Roisin Murphy came up on another thread.

The brief I had was - un-approachable art gallery owner, does ju-jitsu, plays bass in a band. I'm gonna add, has MANY lovers (probably pansexual haha), probably speaks french and ancient egyption. Could defo be played by Tilda S. Pinch of Blake Lively in A Simple Favour...Jil Sander, Alexander McQueen...

Think massive brightly coloured floor length coats, big silhouette, Sharp masculine tailoring, volume in strange places, structure, architectural things, bold colour... nothing clingy or sweet.

I would love to know if anyone else likes this style, who they follow / style icons are for this, and what would this stye be called?

The brief I had was - un-approachable art gallery owner, does ju-jitsu, plays bass in a band. I'm gonna add, has MANY lovers (probably pansexual haha), probably speaks french and ancient egyption.

in order to ‘dress like that’ you need to ‘be like that’, otherwise you will just be a spectacle

This also is true …

in order to ‘dress like that’ you need to ‘be like that’, otherwise you will just be a spectacle

Absolutely agree

Also agree although I think sometimes clothes give us permission (if we feel we need it) to ‘be’ a persona or do certain things etc etc and it can create a mood or give confidence to wear clothes that we feel fit that thing. That’s in my experience more about a specific event though.

it won’t work to dress as Roisin Murphy or Tilda Swinton long term if you’re not actually either of them, that’s wearing a costume rather than your own clothes.

Excellent post. Hugely resonates with me as a woman who often feels extremely unfeminine, wasn't raised any different from my brothers, admires androgynous styling on both sexes BUT has an hourglass figure which needs clothes designed by someone who understands boobs, hips, waists and thighs.

Commiserations on your new uniform. Perhaps if your employer had to foot the bill for the "gender affirming surgery" all it's female workforce suddenly realised they needed to fit into their work clothes they'd think again.

I've only just found this thread and I realise it has been dormant for a while, but I'm very interested in the sort of style you describe, OP. After 50+ years of trying out lots of different styles but never really considering androgyny, I've found myself liking some of the more colourful patterned men's shirts recently, and wishing I could find a men's-style waistcoat that fitted me well.

This:

Think massive brightly coloured floor length coats, big silhouette, Sharp masculine tailoring, volume in strange places, structure, architectural things, bold colour... nothing clingy or sweet

made me think of Prince first and foremost. Do you like his style? Not the heels, obviously as you said you don't like them, but the frock coats and voluminous shirts maybe. I think that could be an interesting look on a woman who wasn't afraid to be noticed and unusual.

I don't know where you live or whether anything like this is available there, but a friend of mine, who loves unusual clothes, lives in a city with a major opera house and she goes to their costume sales every year. She's picked up lots of unusual things from there, from over-the-top formal dresses to jackets and waistcoats designed for male ballet dancers. If you can't get to a physical sale, it looks like Etsy has theatre costume items too.

The internalised misogyny in your posts is very off-putting even if the fashion possibilities raised might be interesting. I do think you might benefit from a hobby or pursuit not related to navel gazing.