Help me. I feel like shit

[Desperateinseattle]

I’m a mid 30s mum with a stupid amount of animals and live in the country. I work too much and money isn’t an issue but prefer to avoid stupid expense. I am a size 14:16, often flitting down to a 12-14. Big boobs, generally hour glass but short at 5’2. Stumpy.

I want simple- high end classic vibe but also don’t give a fuck- will last and tolerate being thrown in a washing machine and then tumbled endlessly. I want to be comfortable without it making me look like a sack of spuds.

I do keep up with my eyebrow wax and tint, keep my nails short and natural, keep a pedicure topped up when not hiding my trotters in winter months.

i Live in supermarket pick ups right now and just feel overall a bit unkempt and crap but don’t really know where to start to smarten up without the unrealistic approach of turning into someone who reallllly cares 😂

Could you link me to the leggings please? I’m struggling to find. Thank you!

Hi @Desperateinseattle its these ones they are fab https://www.matalan.co.uk/clothing/souluxe-black-sports-leggings/14406807.html?switchcurrency=GBP&shippingcountry=GB&variation=14406809&creative=646698504956&keyword=&matchtype=&network=g&device=m&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIzeGgorWHggMVTtXtCh1suAIKEAQYASABEgL6XvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds

Ah, I did see these but couldn’t decide from images if they would be more cotton-y stretch leggings or shiny active wear leggings or somewhere in between. What are you wearing these with?

Birkenstock clogs??

and some Chelsea boots?

@Desperateinseattle they are somewhere in between I would guess... they are great at sucking in your tummy (if you need that I do!) I wear them with chunky boots like this GEM1035480,default,pd.html and then a long jumper with either a long gillet or a long coat

what's your colouring like? I try and stick to a bit of a palette of neutrals and am cool toned so I love greys rather than browns...... Sainsbury's and Asda have some great bits in at the moment

I really rate Melissa Murrel on YouTube worth checking her out - I like her casual style of basically throwing a nice coat over a tracksuit. She is really good at styling according to body type too. Some of her pieces are out of my budget but I try and get some ideas and then buy a bit cheaper or find on vinted

@Desperateinseattle just saw your trenches you ordered love both of them! I reckon you could get some nice Chelsea boots too to wear with jeans and your trench

My absolute best buys the last few years have been M&S crew neck cashmere jumpers (I buy a size up so they are slightly slouchy). They immediately make plain jeans and trainers look smarter, are super cosy, and look great with things like leather midi skirts, slip skirts etc. If I bung on a navy one with jeans, trainers and some gold earrings I feel smart enough for a lunch out.

@Desperateinseattle - have you looked at Toast? Their clothes tend to invite a Marmite response, but if you like their clothes, you tend to REALLY like them 🤣

I love Toast but can be difficult if you're not tall-ish.

Have you checked out Really Wild Clothing? https://www.reallywildclothing.com/womenswear/all-women?gclid=CjwKCAjw7c2pBhAZEiwA88pOF9zRpaRKv-bgusfa1S3qva-gB1JUWwDirKlp2TnsW1kBPOGE3QxmaxoCDSUQAvD_BwE

It's expensive but could be good for some investments pieces and styling inspiration.

I am not Tallish, not even a teeny bit lol

jolies I like this idea but I do feel like it’s really hard to pull off the exact look you describe with my massive boobs, I can’t quite articulate why, but they’re just there aren’t they

A deep v neck in a darker shade might do the trick, or a longer - length cardi over a tshirt. I’m around a size 12 and an E - cup (when not pregnant!) but I buy T-shirts and jumpers in a 14 so they don’t look too tight and hang a bit more nicely.

I've bought two maxi cardigans/coatigans in tan (Mango below) and black, they're almost like coats for wearing in the house, but they work well on the days when it's too mild for a proper coat. They smarten everything up.

They work really well over knitted loungewear but also over jeans, leggings, wide legs and t- shirts or shirts.

Oo I like the tan one!

okay off to look for v neck!

I wear a singular gold necklace (never take off) dainty, not chunky. Small gold hoops and just my wedding rings. Is this ok?

No fashion tips really but you sound like someone I'd be friends with 😂 don't beat yourself up

I think buying items in a classic color palette that works together is useful , minimizing fuss , looks sleeker!

I’m a terrible friend 😂 chaotic and hard to pin down. Rather reflective of current dress sense actually!

yes I like autumnal colours - tans, beige, stone, plums, greens, navy.

Im think some good pieces- nice coats, bag, shoes and some better thought towards my hair (been in tiktok trying to see if I can go from ms trunchable bun to fashionable’knot’!) I’m not washing it anymore than I can be arsed and I’ve somewhat given up drying it recently too. Too fucking tired!

hoping this will carry me through for a moment. Have ordered high waisted jeans, a nice belt, those leggings mentioned up thread and I’m trying to find some jumpers that won’t make me feel even bigger than I do already.

Thankgod for the internet.

The trunchbun is my go to look as well 😂

Fucking hell, Vinted is DANGEROUS

People often tell me I look ‘together’ and my top tip is: monochrome. Doesn’t matter if it’s navy or black or brown or green or charcoal grey - I tend to wear the same colour top and bottom. It elongates and is automatically sleeker. I’m always happier in a dress or jumpsuit so the colour blocking mimics that feel for me.

I’m a size 12, E cup so booby, and I live in boat neck tops that I wear with pencil skirts, satin pleated skirts or wide leg trousers (the M&S heavy jersey ones at £17.50 I would buy if they were triple the price, they’re that good!). So do try a slash neck/boat neck, us booby girls don’t only suit the usual V neck.

I also like thin knits rather than a bulky jumper with trousers. Uniqlo have fine merino ones for £29 in all sorts of colours and they wash and wear really well.

All these I choose so I can tuck them in. I need a waist - love the Lagenlook oversized stuff but I can’t get used to that silhouette on me.

Yep, Vinted is dangerous but can be a cheaper way to try out a new style you’re not sure about. Happy shopping OP!

I really like Ladyofthemanor77 on Instagram/ FB. She always has loads of good suggestions

https://www.instagram.com/ladyofthemanor77/?hl=en

Feeling deflated.

wore the new trench (just realised as I typed this the other one hasn’t arrived yet!)

Dh laughed and said “why you wearing a delboy coat!”

friend asked if I was naked under it and had some banter about me being a flasher now, but restrospectivley I’m thinking there was no compliment either so maybe I’m just not wearing this well!

Put an elegant and simple broach on the the lapel of the trench coat. Get a beautiful , generous scarf that compliments your eye colour and even coordinates with the broach (if it’s got a colour) and wear that with it.