Apparently I need some smart/casual black trousers for an event. Sounds simple, but I live in skirts, so I don't actually own any!
Any suggestions for where I can pick up a pair of trousers to fit a short fat woman with a giant arse? Has to be a high street store because I'm not convinced anything will fit me and I'll need to try it on. Can't be faffed with returning everything at the post office...
Bonus points if there's vanity sizing.
Extra bonus points if you can recommend somewhere I can buy a pair of jeans that fits. I mean, if I'm braving the bloody high street, I may as well go the whole hog if it exists...