Frumpy

[JaneJeffer]

Can people please stop using this word to insult people who don't want to wear what you would wear. I'm fed up of seeing it.

Any other words you would like to ban?

Yes

What if the op says 'is this frumpy?' Is that ok.
What about the word 'trendy'?
My daughter tells me it's a 'mum' word which makes me use it even more.

Let’s hear all the style and beauty-related words you would like to outlaw, then.

What’s wrong with ‘frumpy’ as a word?

What’s wrong with frumpy? It very accurately describes a certain look which most people don’t want. It’s not like it’s describing a sort of person?

I said "as an insult". Fair enough you don't like what someone else does. No need to be horrible.

How is it being used as an insult on a message board?

"That looks frumpy."
"You look frumpy"

Neither scream an attempt at offense?

Well, anything used as an insult isn’t pleasant. That’s why it’s an insult.

The word frumpy on its own is fine though

Hmm. I think frumpy means not dressing for the male gaze. It's not the most offensive word to describe a woman but it's another one that's never used on men!!

Would it be better to say it was the clothing that looked frumpy rather than the wearer?

Are people accosting you in the street to tell you that you are frumpy? I doubt it! What’s this about? Has somebody asked for an opinion on an outfit on a S&B thread, somebody else has said “that’s a bit frumpy” and you are insulted on behalf of the person who asked the question?

I love my comfy frumpy look a far cry from when I wore tight corset dresses and bloody high heels, never again.

I don't hate the word frumpy, I think it can be useful to describe an aesthetic that most people want to avoid.

I do hate it when it's used in the contexts of "ALL Toast/Boden clothes are frumpy." Or "Ignore those posters, I bet they're just frumpy!" when someone has disagreed with something even if they've never seen the person accused of being frumpy in the flesh so have no idea how they dress. It's just narrow-minded and a bit mad to write off entire brands like that.

I agree OP, I also don’t like it when frumpy is used as an insult: it seems to be mainly directed at anyone who is female but neither young, nor thin. There was a recent thread where a poster described people who don’t like fashion as ‘frumpy people’ . Frankly that just made me laugh though 😂

I've seen it too much lately - skinny jeans are frumpy and you obviously have no style, everyone on MN dresses in frumpy Boden , etc. used to be hurtful not helpful.

I don't see those type of comments as being helpful in any way.

@Marmelace

Would it be better to say it was the clothing that looked frumpy rather than the wearer?

Not really. The exact same item might look like Oscar night glamour on one person and hopelessly frumpy on another. It is unfortunately how it is worn that renders an item frumpy.

IMVHO.

OK so it’s the generalised description of a type of garment or a clothing brand as frumpy that’s offensive? Particularly when it’s a garment or brand that lots of people wear?

Most of the ‘skinny jeans, are they uncool now?’ threads usually descend into “they [unspecified] will prise my skinny jeans from my cold dead hands etc etc” so I’m not sure that many posters find it offensive.

No @Iamthewombat I think you must have read my OP wrong. It's using frumpy as an insult that I object to.

Well, insults tend to be in the eye (or ear) of the beholder, don’t they? So if someone says, to quote your post, oh, all Mumsnet members wear frumpy Boden clothes, you might be insulted or you might not. Even if you are a Boden devotee. I’m not, but I’d just laugh.

I don't own any Boden. You just don't understand what I'm saying.

You’re doing a great job getting everyone on board with your “ban frumpy” campaign.

No.

Frumpy. Frumpy. Frumpy.

@Iamthewombat

You’re doing a great job getting everyone on board with your “ban frumpy” campaign.

It's not a campaign just a polite request.

Is it? Every time anyone tries to engage with you, you’re moaning that they ‘don’t understand’ or ‘haven’t read your posts properly’.

Really?