Anyone else want bigger, wavier hair?

[Pheasantlysurprised]

Im growing more and more towards this in recent years.
Im fluffy and wavy myself, and have spent the past 15 years ironing it into a tired, flat disaster. If I slap a bit of leave in conditioner on it and dry it in a twist, or else just allow it flow, it looks healthier and thicker and just....more alive.
It really doesn't have to conform to anything it isn't. And I don't have to spend a fortune 'correcting' something that should not be considered wrong.

I was also looking at some older style pics on Pinterest and loved the wanton haphazardness of Helena Bonham carter's hair, Kate bush, etc.

Im not suggesting the 80's bon Jovi here, im talking about a more relaxed, natural, substantial kind of liberation from the super glossy, almost cardboard cut out styles we have been used to seeing for so long now, where women in the media are all straightened and glossed, afraid to move in case a stray strand breaks free.
Natural straight hair is gorgeous, but it has dominated the demands on women for too long, I think. The desperation to fight any fluffiness or frizz is kind of sad really.

Anyone else growing to prefer a little more wildness and naturalness to their hairstyles? This can look both contemporary and well groomed, but I believe we have been hoodwinked into perceiving it as crazy or untidy.
It didnt seem to bother anyone prior to the GHD craze - a very long running obsessive trend for very repressed, neat hair that had to reflect light like gloss paint and barely move.

And it isn't 'either-or' either: we can absolutely have natural, bigger hair without being untidy. I can't even relate to having to become a 'curly girl', which always strikes me as infantile and yet another way to beat oneself into submission - many curls and waves are not uniform and such strict methods are no cheerier than the GHD obsession to my mind.

Seen a lot of younger women and girls with long, fluffy hair, going with their natural texture out and about for a few years now. It's one thing as a middle aged woman I am happy to see!

I think this thread is more about what people can do to embrace their natural hair state, i.e. wavy / curly, rather than using heat - blow drying, curling gadgets, etc (or other means) - to ‘create’ curls.

Inspired by this thread, after swimming this morning I've washed my hair, combed some product through it and left it to dry naturally. I'm going to be at home all day so if it's a mess it won't matter.

I would go swimming so much more often if it wasn't for the time I have to spend styling my hair afterwards, and I do resent allowing my hair to limit my lifestyle .. I'm not very hopeful that it'll look OK but we'll see!

Actually took advice from earlier in thread and washed with minimal shampoo and only at hairline.
Then cleansed the rest with conditioner.
Quite a difference, and a lot less dryness/fuzz. Will keep you posted!

I did try the Aussie curl serum and it made my hair really sticky and greasy, so I guess not everything is universally great.

@highlandcoo

Inspired by this thread, after swimming this morning I've washed my hair, combed some product through it and left it to dry naturally. I'm going to be at home all day so if it's a mess it won't matter.

I would go swimming so much more often if it wasn't for the time I have to spend styling my hair afterwards, and I do resent allowing my hair to limit my lifestyle .. I'm not very hopeful that it'll look OK but we'll see!

ooh let us know how you get on, please! it might seem awkward at first if you are not used to it.

Hi again, here is the result. I used quite a lot of oil, much more than recommended, and maybe should have used even more on the middle section at the back. It still looks a bit frizzy and dry.
It’s not as bad as I expected but does look a bit triangular iyswim.. if I wanted to do this more often I might have to have more layers cut into it perhaps?
Thanks so much for the prompt to give this a go though, OP. I’ll try again on future swimming days and experiment with other products, also try your tip of less shampoo and more conditioner

@highlandcoo

Hi again, here is the result. I used quite a lot of oil, much more than recommended, and maybe should have used even more on the middle section at the back. It still looks a bit frizzy and dry. It’s not as bad as I expected but does look a bit triangular iyswim.. if I wanted to do this more often I might have to have more layers cut into it perhaps? Thanks so much for the prompt to give this a go though, OP. I’ll try again on future swimming days and experiment with other products, also try your tip of less shampoo and more conditioner

I don't think it is triangular, I think we are too used to seeing flattened, parallel hair all the time and have lost a sense of how non straight hair naturally falls - and to be honest I prefer it, there is more life and movement.

I would try out a few conditioning treatments just for the mid length ends. Are you used to heat styling it? Often, if we persist the hair does become softer and less dry quite quickly. I cant recommend the curly girl thing as mine doesn't work well with that, but I did an experiment a few days ago where I only washed the roots with shampoo and left a leave in conditioner on the ends - the result was much shinier and soft.

I love the colour of your hair, too, it is nice and thick.

I remember l left my hair to dry in it’s natural hair pattern & was told “ did u stick your finger in a socket?”
Then had reassuring comments from other colleagues about “ don’t worry / l have to straighten mine too!” etc…
This type of hair / pattern, needs to be normalised & probably we need to leave it be - for that to happen! 😉

@highlandcoo I think combing it was the issue. If I comb mine when wet and then leave it, it looks EXACTLY like that too. Leave it soaking wet (just gently pat with towel / an old tshirt so you're not dripping water everywhere) and then scrunch product from the bottom upwards, encouraging the curl to form. Then leave it. Absolutely no combing!

I think so @RobertaFirmino.

Is that right?

Apologies, @RobertaFirmino.

I've had mad hair all my life @Pheasantlysurprised, it's super-curly at the back and sides and wavy at the front, but has a straight layer over the back curls. Hairdressers always laugh at my hair texture because it has a layer of straightish hair over mad curls at the back. It's very hard to take a photo of the back of one's head!

BUT that's my hair underneath, and the top layer is quite wavy-straight.

I can't remember the last time I brushed my hair. Mad hair doesn't take well to brushing or blowdrying. I think you're just trying to force it to be something it's not.

ALSO, I can't use curly-girl methods because my top hair doesn't like it.

The best thing I've found is Opalex, as I mentioned in earlier posts. It homogenises it as well as anything I've found.

The best thing is to love your mad hair though, hence the photos!

mine is similiar long layers shorter at sides ,8 heated rollers the big ones and i get beautiful waves,i hate sleek straight hair it doesnt suit me so i never followed that trend,in 54 and get mistaken for my grandchilds mum at school gates.You shouldnt follow trends i dress how i want and still wear skinny jeans and a leather biker jacket,i do whats comfy for me

Well I've got a white girl afro. When it's long the weight loosens the curls but at the moment its shoulder length and shrinks 2 to 4 inches depending on the weather. I love my hair and have never wanted to be straight. No that's a lie at school when hair products for curls didnt exist, I hated it. In my twenties thirties even forties it was wild and down to my mid back, think Sarah Brightman. I have to product it with mousse and leave in conditioner, then twist it in ringlets. I leave to dry naturally which does take an age but I only wash it every ten days (yes I know)
try a silk pillowcase, their fabulous

When my hair was long, I would put the product in it then turn upside down (just my head) and scrunch. Then I would loosely tie it up into a pineapple pony, all squished up. I would sleep like that and the next day I would take it out and wow it was gorgeous. Good tip is to rince your hair in cold water, after conditioner removed. It makes the hair less frizzy.

I find children leave in conditioner is great, it's a lot less heavy. You can buy it on line.

Has anyone used the merewave products? i have slightly furry hair, with a hint of wave and would love to see if I could have waves. I keep seeing their products advertised, but they’re pricey enough!

@DareDevil223

I have thick wavy hair which looks weird when straightened, it just doesn't suit me. I just diffuser dry it and let it do its own thing. So much easier and it stays in good condition.

Your hair is a thing of beauty. Mine is as limp and straight as can be. As a child, I was told by my mother that if I ate up all my bread crusts, my hair would become curly. It was not true!

My hair is going dry from products and colours and hot straighteners so I decided to leave it to dry naturally. it has a lot of wave that I think maybe looks nice. Am a bit undecided whether I look sexily tousled or mad dragged through a hedge cat lady.

@shakingmytambourineatyou

My hair is going dry from products and colours and hot straighteners so I decided to leave it to dry naturally. it has a lot of wave that I think maybe looks nice. Am a bit undecided whether I look sexily tousled or mad dragged through a hedge cat lady.

nope, they just want you to think that so you will spend £££ on a fucking product to flatten it and a thousand shitty de frizz serums. There is no difference in value or beauty between straight and wild hair.

I use superdrugs own mousse its bloody marvelous for curly hair and about £2 ,for a big can. I also use leave in conditioner which I either get on line or buy from TKMAXX. Only comb when conditioner is on, never when dry. I use my fingers to keep it from knotting.

I work at a university and have noticed that none of the female students straighten their hair. It's much more of a millennial look to have flat "Rachel" hair and the younger generation go for natural waviness

I have naturally huge hair and usually wear it scrunched in a bun as I can't bear it boinging around. I love a good straightener!

I’ve never straightened my hair, I occasionally use straighteners but never to straighten iykwim. It’s tousled, low maintenance and getting better the older I get. I bloody love it,

Couple of pics I really like with wild hair going on!
I think it's that dark academia/boho thing, I quite like it.

Helena Bonham Carter has her own style. She owns it. And would look good in a sack, which she often wears!
On another point, this thread has inspired me, I am getting my ends blunt cut and will embrace the waves. Thanks OP.

@Pheasantlysurprised

Couple of pics I really like with wild hair going on! I think it's that dark academia/boho thing, I quite like it.

OP I really like the dark academia look! It was my style as a student back in the day, and many years later I still find it really appealing. We were talking earlier about triangular hair - maybe it just needs to be slightly longer and not hitting my shoulders and sticking out. I'm going to persevere; it would be so great not to spend hours slaving over it. coffeschmoffee thanks for the tip. I did something very similar to what you suggest and ended up with pretty nice curls (photo further up the thread). Trouble is, it works well some days and not others, but I reckon I need to be patient, practise, and persevere to find the best products. Appreciate all the advice; thank you