How to look more modern

[Nightmarenextdoor]

I went to a trade event at the weekend (creative industry) and was really aware of feeling not quite right. Maybe it was the heat, maybe the weight I’ve put on over lockdown or maybe I’m dressing like I did 18 months/2 years ago and everyone else has moved on.

I like simple comfy clothes but with a bit of an edge - thinking maybe I’ve lost the edge!

Any ideas how to update myself a bit?

Yep. I’m not wild about the first pair. My own slight concern about Teva is they’ve been “hot” for a few years. ( ie on trend). I decided not to buy not because I don’t like them but I’m looking for a bit of longevity. I think I’m going to try and find a minimalist tan sandal and stick with my black studded 2 strap Arizona’s which kind of have that chunky feel.

The tevas in the link are not great.

But God! Birkenstock keep doing realllllly good collaborations damn them. Their latest are with Toogood.

Thanks everyone, I've always liked walking sandals and been wearing them unfashionably for years, it just seems wrong to wear them to look smart!

Have worn Teva for years as sadly the footbed on Birkenstocks don't suit my feet so have never found them comfortable/been able to wear them. Such a shame as I want the shearling lined ones and loved their Proenza Schouler collab as well as the aforementioned Studio TooGood one

@sansucre I can't wear Birkenstock's either, all the lumps and bumps are in entirely the wrong place for my feet.

I can't wear Birks either! thought it was just me but the moulds don't fit my foot.

I didn't get on with tevas but I love my birkies.

These are things that look instantly dated right now:
High heels
Bodycon anything
Shift dresses
Side parting in hair
Ballet flats

Side parting in hair

My cowslick says otherwise 🤣 if I part my hair in the middle I look like a Lego moon head with a weird quiff. Side parting looks better and slims my face so give me dated ☺️

@Nightmarenextdoor I missed the photos before they were taken down - any chance you could direct me to the Instagram page? I want to see the yellow trousers outfit now!!

@Squiz81 oh I didn’t realise they don’t stay! It’s @homeandgiftharrogate 😊

[quote Nightmarenextdoor]**@Squiz81* oh I didn’t realise they don’t stay! It’s @homeandgiftharrogate* 😊[/quote]
They do usually buy those photos were taken down by MN as they were against the guidelines

Oh I genuinely didn’t realise or think I was doing anything wrong - my bad as the young people say 🤦🏻😂

i'm another who can't do a centre parting

@Nightmarenextdoor

Oh I genuinely didn’t realise or think I was doing anything wrong - my bad as the young people say 🤦🏻😂

I wouldn’t have realised either, the pics are already in the public domain 🤷🏽‍♀️

@CornedBeef451 it really has to be your choice what you wear especially regarding comfort but that specific style you linked to won't ( IMO) stay around very long. Unlike the more traditional Teva style. You could try it out by getting a less expensive dupe eg ASOS or M&S do some good ones.
these look good

I have these from last year

For me, Tevas will forever be associated with backpacking and looking decidedly unglamorous and scruffy, although I love birkenstocks.
I showed my husband a picture of the Tevas and he said they were the least attractive footwear he could ever imagine on a woman
They are comfortable though! I'm personally enjoying the slipper-style, more masculine version of a ballet flat (smoking slipper?)
In general I feel like the more masculine shapes are much more modern that traditionally feminine ones (t-shirt dress vs wrap dress etc)

This thread has been so useful. Thank you for all the tips. I am stuck in the nineties in so many ways, and have put on weight, so I’ve been feeling pretty down about my appearance. I used to love clothes shopping and feeling stylish, but I’ve really lost my way.

I bought a pair of Vejas and funky new sunglasses at the weekend, and a longline shirt from Zara, and it’s given me a real boost. I’m now going to order some Arizona Love sandals and send back the strappy Boden ones I ordered earlier in the week which haven’t even arrived yet, but I now realise they are totally dated. Going to look at Raey next.

My biggest problem really is that wide trousers look awful on me. I’m short and have no waist, so they make me look dumpy and fat. French tucking makes it worse. In addition to being thick of waist, I am flattish of chest, so high necklines are also out. V necks are the most flattering on me, but appear to be out. It’s very difficult.

I showed my husband a picture of the Tevas and he said they were the least attractive footwear he could ever imagine on a woman

This is a whole other problem in itself - what I like to wear, feel comfy and 'me' in is a world away from the sort of style men probably find attractive - it's tricky enough as a single woman in your late 40s!

My DH liked my Tevas so much he bought himself a pair

@VenusClapTrap

Are you sure about the necklines? I’ve got big boobs and can find some high necklines tricky… I can get around it if the waist is nipped in not loose. If you want to wear V necks though because you feel they suit you don’t go for anything too “ polite” - I bet those Boden sandals were polite. Go and try some men’s sweaters on - make them loose and a bit bigger than you think then push the sleeves up. Put a nice bra on underneath. I keep my eyes peeled for menswear in charity shops. I recently bought a grey cashmere sweater from the men’s section but it’s a bit fitted… if I wear it with fitted trousers I’m going to look really really “nice” in a “ off to church” kind of way. So I’ll wear it with big trousers… high waisted, wide leg. I’ve got some grey jersey ones from M&S so I might do the monochrome look with some trainers. It’s about getting to grips with the proportions… look at the Raey Instagram because they’re really good at it.

@VenusClapTrap you sound like me a few years ago. I in no way suggest I am super stylish but I do love fashion ( and always did pre kids and a whole host of life). What I'm trying to do is stick to what I know suits me and my lifestyle but in a slightly updated way, so jeans and top pretty much every day but an up to date style ( if it suits me) and a good tshirt or pretty blouse. I spend more money over item but less over all I think

More money PER item ^

Here we go… oversized sweaters and ones a V neck.

Thanks Divebar and Sooverthehill. Massive jumpers are a good call. I really like that second photo - but look! Narrow trousers! Are they ok if teamed with big top halves then?

I’m good at bras - I go to Rigby and Pellar once a year and it does make a big difference. But my stomach still sticks out more than my chest. I really need to sort out doing some exercise. I’m smallish and have always been a size 10 (although vanity sizing means that sizes have kept pace with me, rather than me staying the same size) so I’ve never had much incentive to get fit, and until now could eat what I liked. But suddenly I’ve got a perimenopausal explosion round the middle and something has to be done.

Yes, the Boden sandals are polite. Perfect description.