What happened to S&B?

[janlevinson]

I used to browse this topic regularly several years ago and I enjoyed the recommendations of Ash high tops, Net A Porter sale items and high end make up, amongst other things. Loved reading what LetThemEatCake had been buying.
I've been having migrating over to here again recently after a long time away and it's all Roman Originals, granny sandals and things that "wash well".
WTF happened?
~lighthearted~

@LuckyMcDucky

That's lovely you've found someone sneery enough to agree with you op, but did it not occur to you that starting a thread on a board, saying how shit you find the board might seem like a bit of a dick move? Could you not have done some of your own research? I wouldn't stroll on to the baby names board and say "everyone on here has terrible taste in baby names. Can you help me?" and expect not to get my arse handed to me. You've been let off lightly on here and you started a nasty thread. Calling it light-hearted seems a bit pointless as well. It's akin to the school bully saying "I was only JOKING". So honestly I hope you find somewhere else to post which meets your seriously standards . Not here please!

It's not about sneering, it's about having a range. You get plenty of posts on the baby names board by people who are thinking Ottilie and Hector, and others thinking Ruby and Zac, or Willow and Bodhi. All are great, variation is good!

And there's room for Roman Originals, Tu, and Hotter on a style board alongside Theory and Frame. But if it's meant to be a style board (not just a clothing board), there should be at least some of both.

To use your baby names example, the challenge right now is that it's like anyone who likes the name Willow and wants to know of similar suggestions gets shouted down by people saying any name is great, it's whatever the family likes, and personally they're called Susan and don't see anything wrong with that. Or someone coming on saying they want a 2021-style posh girls name and being repeatedly assured that Kylie is it.

I agree with that last post Rubicon. There is room for everything, but that isn't at all what op said.

I've seen one thread on Roman Originals and the op on that thread admits herself that it isn't high fashion, but she likes it. Op started a sneery thread about it and others. That isn't creating room for everyone. It's the total opposite.

Don't like the thread in question, the famous MN saying is to scroll on by. So yeah. Do that.

And before anyone says scroll on by this thread. Well know. Op came on and slagged off the board and specific threads, which is poor form. I am usually pretty non confrontational on MN. But this sort of thing grinds my gears, so no, I won't slink off or nod along when people are being unecessarily sneery about threads they aren't even interested in. I'm not interested in they Roman O thread either btw and only saw it because it was mentioned here. So you know what I did? I didn't post on it. Revolutionary concept eh?

I agree with @floisme, I can't bear it when people plop onto threads here to sneer that they don't care what they look like (with the implication that anyone who does is wrong). I think we can all agree that style and fashion are not the same thing, and that people should be allowed to discuss comfort as well, but there should be room for all, with no one getting sneered at.

OP I do get you. I think it is just the passing of time. The people who post here are different now, some are the same but older, some are new and different. Some have moved on elsewhere. It's just different.

The Vogue threads were indeed the successor to the Avid & Wise threads, but I think you've missed their heyday, the threads move slowly now due to Covid and general life getting in the way. However I will happily join in any threads you want to start about actual fashion, rather than Roman Originals

I'm not unsympathetic to the op. I kind of miss some of the old eye watering / mouth watering links. I always enjoyed the odd handbag fight. But these are very different times. The Voguers stopped posting for a while last year because they felt it wasn't appropriate and they only returned by popular demand. And fashions move on, and will move on again, and I'm afraid they will quite likely take sustainability with them when they do.

And personally I find it useful that the default (though not the only) poster here has had kids so their body isn't as taut and springy as it used to be, that they're normally on a budget and that their clothes have to do a job as well as look good. It's the same reason why I'd rather watch people in real life than get my ideas from Instagram.

No*

Autocorrect 🙄

Soz, cross posted with Blair - also one of the early Voguers as I recall

Interesting thread. I too, am a bit over the posters coming on to say you should wear what you want as long as it's comfortable, not give shit what ppl think etc. That leggings under the dress thread was a prime example. It's definitely a different vibe to the S&B of ten years ago. There are still some great fashion threads though, you just have to delve in a bit

@MapleMay11

I think people who choose not to purchase from the brands regularly promoted on here (Hush, Cos, &Other Stories, Arket, Me + Em etc) feel they have nothing to contribute so generally stay away. I personally love Net a Porter, Matches, Browns, My Theresa but don't feel this is the forum to discuss designer fashion.

Why not though? I like those sites too, and there will be plenty of people like me here. The Avid & Wise group from yesteryear were pretty high end. But they still have a place on this board and there's still a place for the M&S jean people and the hush people (and the hotter shoe people too for that matter).

I read the Chanel bag thread recently - I can't afford a 2.55 but it's just as much S&B as weekday or asos.

Why not start a thread called 'let's discuss high end fashion' instead of one called 'what happened to s&b' as if you are the only stylish person on here then?

This is what's in style now. Fine for young women but if I wore this being in my fifties I'd look awful.

There is a lot of gate-keeping on this board which makes is not the easiest place to give honest feedback.

Some are those like BlairWaldorfLovesShopping and others have mentioned, who can't wait to tell you that they don't care about fashion, so wear what is comfortable.

There is also a group who like to call people out for ageism. Don't misunderstand me, I think women of all ages can be beautiful and stylish, but the same thing won't achieve that for everyone. I don't think it's ageist to say that not everything suits everyone (like body type and skin tone effecting shapes and colour palette) and what looks good on someone who is 17 may not suit someone who is 30, and what suits someone at 30 may not work for someone who is 50. But if you dare say that on many threads you get torn to shreds.

HelenHywater I suppose I feel uncomfortable sharing how much I spend on certain items because of the inevitable responses from some posters. On the Purse Forum, for example, there's no judgement and you can discuss freely.

The thing is, practical clothing and footwear, even items that a few years ago would be considered frumpy, has been a trend for quite some time now. Not that it is necessarily stylish, or that being in fashion means you are stylish or vice versa, but personally I've always liked comfortable and understated clothes and uncomfortable shoes are just a waste of money.

Having been a teenager in the late 80s and early 90s I went from DMs to trainers and never quite got large heels, ever and I don't plan to start now. Regardless of what is fashionable, vamp isn't my style.

My favourite comment on age and clothing was on the ‘Am I too old to wear these?’ (deliberately) ugly sandals thread.

Fembot123
’You are too old to wear them ironically and too young to wear them normally’

@JaneJeffer dear god, that young woman is dressed as an abscess

There is also a group who like to call people out for ageism.

Guess I'm in this group, except you're wrong about me liking it. I hate doing it. Sometimes I'm just not in the mood and I let it go. But I also think there are at least two things going on when people talk about age. There's a big difference between acknowledging that age changes your body - of course it does and it needs discussing - and using age as a generic insult. It's the second that pisses me off and I don't apologise for that.

@LunaNorth I love the sunglasses and rollneck. I'm very into coloured lenses at the moment though.

@janlevinson

I used to browse this topic regularly several years ago and I enjoyed the recommendations of Ash high tops, Net A Porter sale items and high end make up, amongst other things. Loved reading what LetThemEatCake had been buying. I've been having migrating over to here again recently after a long time away and it's all Roman Originals, granny sandals and things that "wash well". WTF happened? ~lighthearted~

I'm pretty new to Mumsnet and don't know what it was like before however I do think I get what you're saying and don't think you're trying to be mean. I'm potentially opening myself up to lots of eye rolling and arguments but this is my take on the discussion.

I'm 34 and have an interest in trends, to an extent, and fashion. I'm not going to buy everything on ASOS's new in page or dress like a 15 year old on TikTok but equally I would not shop in (for example) SeaSalt, FatFace or Joe Browns, which in my opinion are not trend led but comfort led.

Whilst timeless style and what's in fashion right this second are often not the same thing, there are overlaps and as this is a style board, I do find the whole 'I don't care just wear what you want' argument to be strange. Of course, wear what you want but sometimes things that are purely comfortable aren't stylish, and do look dated. Other things are timeless and can be comfortable AND always look stylish, but small details like the length or wether they are cut to be fitted/loose will make them look up to date.

Again I know the argument is that this is just individual opinion and I'll probably get slated for this but I do think with style there is a level of taste. Same with other creative things like interiors. That doesn't mean everyone has to dress like clones because of course there are different styles within this but I don't think anything can be considered 'stylish' just because someone might like to wear it. But again, if you don't care about that crack on!

I also think style has nothing to do with age. Iris Apfel is one of the most stylish women around and she is almost 100

You won't get any argument from me @CocoandCleo. There is room for all sorts of discussion and what you are describing about the nuances, where, you can wear something comfortable which also manages to be stylish because of subtle differences like the length etc, is exactly why I like this board and the inclusivity of it.

Saying, re functional clothes, as you have, "if that's what you like, crack on", is not what op said.

Sometimes we all need something more functional, depending on what you're doing. I don't fancy climbing a mountain in stylish but uncomfortable shoes for example. There really is room for everyone and that doesn't mean anything terrible has happened to the board.

I am a regular reader and occasional poster on this thread. I work hard to make the most of my body shape, love to wear colour (often totally standing out not in what I wear, but the colour of it) and print and choose clothing that fits and hangs well, ignoring what a fabric is made of and focusing on how it performs. I will happily buy from anywhere I find an item that I love (within my budget and not feeling guilty if it is a little more than some, less than others), it loves me and I think will be cost per wear smart. I follow blogs, couture label sites and watch their shows, check up on recommendations from here (often leading me to labels and stores I had no idea existed and have now become favourites) and elsewhere and have to say that style is what makes you happy and of course it will differ for each and everyone of us. What the fashion press, brands, web stores and those paid to hype fashion, want you to wear is something that keeps the industry turning over, but imo most of us want something that works for us and not only looks good on a page, hence the change in some of the threads lately and perhaps we are becoming more style smart and smarting less from trying to follow someone else's style! One of the dresses that I get most comments on was from Damart!! Chance spot and buy in a charity shop, made of a good quality linen, arranged almost in a patchwork and in shades of grey / grey pattern and looks much more expensive, washes and wears very well and in no way is representative of what's often sold on the high street, but makes me feel good. If anyone ever would have said I'd have an item from Damart in my wardrobe I would have laughed, but seeing it in the flesh and wearing it shows that all stores have the occasional gem and possibly because they feel they can take the occasional chance with a look and not alienate their buyers. I look at the Vogue's on line site, amongst many others, but feel that even they've lost their way and draping an outfit on a slim body is not the same as wearing it. I love Net a Porter for trends and colours but have to laugh at some of their outfits and prices for denim jackets and skirts which seem to differ only by the label sewn in them and certainly not in the look. Dress for you, the life you live, what makes you happy and long may this thread continue to express an opinion other than mine.

@Cocolapew

But what is starting to piss me off is not being able to talk about what's in or out of fashion without someone dropping in to tell you they don't care and yabba yabba doo This is a fair point, and it works both ways. There is a thread atm about Roman Originals and someone is on it saying they would never dream of shopping there. Who cares if you don't want to shop there, it has nothing to do with what the op is asking.

I am the OP om that thread which seems to have caused all the angst ☺ If you read it it wasn't a "it's fabulous everyone should shop there" comment it was more "Oh shit have a lost all taste" (it appears I have 😭)

I love Net a Porter for trends and colours but have to laugh at some of their outfits and prices for denim jackets and skirts which seem to differ only by the label sewn in them and certainly not in the look

That’s such a good point. I have a denim jacket I bought at the tail end of last summer, it’s a kind of utilitarian style with big pockets which would button up to the neck if I ever did it up. Two of my stylish friends have asked if it’s Toast. It isn’t, it came from - wait for it - Roman Originals! It completely illustrates your point @TollgateDebs.

I like it being a big old mixture on here! Never know what you're going to find!!

S&B of old used to more the same group of posters comparing what they had bought or what they wanted to buy.
There's a lot more people asking for help now, weddings, type of jeans for their shape, shoes for sore feet etc.
There's no point coming on to those type of threads and being aghast at someone recommending Hotter or Sketchers or whatever.
But also there's no point going on the higher priced threads and moaning that some people can't afford them and they're in bad taste. I sometimes read the bag threads to look the bags, I can't afford them but don't begrudge anyone who can.

There's a big difference between acknowledging that age changes your body - of course it does and it needs discussing - and using age as a generic insult. It's the second that pisses me off and I don't apologise for that.

Exactly! A PP used "75 year old retired art teacher" as an insult above. In my mind, that person looks awesome. All I want is for "old" not to be a negative and a default insult.