"Nobody ever told me" thread

[littlecatfeet]

I was wondering, do you have any personal style/beauty tips that you worked out all by yourself?

I have two:

1. Never ever apply perfume when you're under stress - running late, or angry, or anxious - it seems to cause that horrible reaction that makes perfume unbearable.
2. When you are carrying 'le flab' (as I call it) a silk slip looks a million times better under a dress than shapewear. It slides past your creases and moves naturally. And you're comfortable!

What hard-won or fluke inspirations do you have to share?

I was going to comment on fashion expert advice.
The perfect white shirt - can't say I want one and it would not look perfect after a few washes.
They usually suggest wearing it with a pair of black trousers.

Great, you look like one of the waiting staff.

@TheSparklyPussycat

Greebols what is the upper water line?

Lift up your eyelid - the pink line just inside, beneath your eyelashes, is the upper water line.

Eek!. Leave it alone.

Trying to hide big boobs under layers and high necked t shirts only makes your boobs look bigger a little cleavage or a v neck is so much better.

For skin water, water, water and more water.

Beauty does come from within, my sister was always a knockout growing up but is currently in the worst shape of her life (her words not mine) but is the happiest she's ever been - she just radiates pure joy and its a pleasure to be in her presence she really is glowing. I honestly have never seen her look better.

*Well this has turned into a depressing read.

Anyone else feeling completely overwhelmed by it all? I'll just add a million more things to my ever expanding to do list I have to juggle to ensure that I don't look like a sack of shit.

Oh and remember to bin my converse and vans by the age of 40.*

Yep but just don’t pay it much attention @ihatebingandflop wear what you like.

It is disappointing though that it’s 2020 and women are STILL telling women what they should wear after 30/40/50 ...

Women’s magazines are full of this ageist rnonsense. 10 things you should wear in your 30s, 20 things you should no longer have in your house in your 40s, 5 things you should say goodbye to in your 20s. What not to wear if you’re 50... do this, wear this, don’t wear that and on and on and on. I mean, who needs men to put women down when we just do it to each other!

@PuppyMonkey

Nope, tried the hairspray thing on tights to stop skirts clinging (it always gets mentioned on these threads) and it definitely doesn't work. Never tried it on shoe soles though...

Tumble dryer sheets will stop the cling!

Don't assume that journalists know more about style or beauty than you.

I used to think that magazine advice was gospel. Then I started to take it with a pinch of salt. Then I realised SO MUCH of it had been wrong (or just not right for me).

They have a certain amount of page space to fill in every issue and they have to keep the advertisers happy by mentioning their brands. Occasionally they might mention something that works for you, but only on a monkeys and typewriters basis.

I'm over 40 and wear what I like.
I usually get compliments when I am wearing something I feel confident in, and often they are clothes that would get ridiculed on here.

I don't particularly like Converse, supergas or stan smiths. They look ok but they don't feel comfortable on me. They are generally too flat if your feet are big or legs are short.

Age-wise, some colours seem to appeal to older women.

I found out for myself that roll necks don't suit me. I have a big fluffy jumper that looks lovely then when I put it on I look like a busty blob.

Don't forget your hands and decollete. They like being treated too

[quote Atalune]@Catlover77 can you link to those tablets please?[/quote]
www.hollandandbarrett.com/shop/product/holland-barrett-organic-high-strength-turmeric-with-black-pepper-60017478

If you get them on repeat order, you get a really good price. Take 2 a day and you will see a difference in a couple of months. My fine hair has never been this thick

A good fitting bra is a must - it will make you look slimmer and help your clothes fit better.

Now I'm off to enjoy my last 5 months wearing my converse before I apparently have to bin them all!

@jrb123

Your favourite make-up - lipstick, foundation, moisturiser or whatever - will almost certainly be available on ebay at less than the High St price, brand new but sometimes in older packaging. .

It might also be a fake that will burn your skin off or damage your eyes. So please research what you buy on Ebay. I bought a mascara once, supposedly sensitive, one that I always used. Used it, eyes starting burning. Never again. I found out about the fakes quite early on and have bought nothing like that on there since.

Long hair is much easier to manage than short hair. I discovered this after decades of elfin cuts (plus am saving tons of money and time on haircuts).

Crisp white shirt - no way.

White doesn't suit everyone.
Even a little popper to close the gaps between button doesn't work if you move your arms. It pops open and displays your tits.
Constantly having to tuck the damn thing in or have an overhang, nope.
Crisp fabric, feels horrible, soft clothing that moves with you is much nicer.
White - spill a drink, splash your lunch, great.
I even tried a shirt/bodysuit thing once, still looked as if it was untucked and the bottom kept riding up my arse.
Felt as if I was wearing my school uniform and expecting to be told off for not wearing my tie.

@imasababa it absolutely IS ageist to use age as a boundary for what people should wear!

I have worked out never to take style tips from people who think everyone over 40 looks the same.

Hear hear!

A lot of people don't iron these days and that's fine, but then they buy clothes which really need ironing before looking presentable

Totally agree and I speak as a now complete non ironer to the point I don’t even own an iron or ironing board BUT as you say that means not buying/owning clothes that need ironing.

I’ve seen so many people who are wearing items that clearly need a good press and/or have “fiddly” parts that haven’t been ironed properly and don’t look good.

There are lots of fabrics and styles that look perfectly ok if dried flat and not ironed.

@fairyandlavender and how would YOU feel if we told you you’re too young to wear certain things? It’s utter nonsense, purely your opinion with no basis in fact and an opinion best kept to yourself

As for your CONTINUED ageism at 0929 - just stop!!

If anything by then you've probably developed your own style and are quietly confident in what works and doesn't work for you. And unlikely to change your mind on that because of the opinion of a twenty-something! absolutely!

Probably according to the fashion industry who just want to push the next big thing and get us continually dumping our old stuff so they can remain relevant and make money. exactly

and stay out of the sun/wear sun cream! being a peely-wally redhead who never tans and only burns no matter if I’ve smothered myself in inch thick top factor sun cream I’ve been doing this for decades! My friends and family who are easy tanning sun worshippers definitely look older and have less smooth skin. I did it not out of vanity but to avoid pain and itching! But it’s served me well

I mean, who needs men to put women down when we just do it to each other! absolutely this shit needs to stop!!

I'm 45 and I have, and wear, three pairs of Converse.
All at once?

@Spasandstripes

Wide leg trousers with turn ups are LETHAL with heels....

Totally outing but I broke BOTH arms with that outfit combo.

I feel bad I laughed at that. But mainly because I several very shaming face plants of my own for the same reason.

I also wear converse and am over 40.

I agree with find colours that work for you and use mainly those in your wardrobe. When you find a great staple you love, buy mulitple and in different colours if you can. I wear jeans nearly every day and have stacks of my current fav.

I find throw away fashion doesn't really work for me anymore. I know what suits me and my daily life, and I dress how I like, how I think suits me, with in that.

Erm, Converse are usually worn by middle class parents over 35 (including me) where I am. Can't remember the last time I saw a teenager or anyone much under 25 wearing them actually. 17 year old DS concurs!

Converse don't look good on anyone over age 40.

Off you fuck. I'm in my 50's and I ROCK my hightops. Stupid, ageist crap.

My rules of fashion:

Do I like it?
Is it comfortable?
Will I wear it?
Will I wear it enough to justify the price?

I never did get “fashion” as in something is fashionable if everyone is wearing/doing it. That’s just boring following the herd. Being different is proper fashion- lead rather than follow.

Wear what you like :) as a pp said, what works for you rather than what's in fashion. In my case, I dress like a toddler and am so ok with that

Makeup is optional (I wish I'd really clocked this earlier! I love makeup but cannot be arsed every day)

"Flattering" means "more pleasing to the male gaze" more often than it means "comfortable and nice to wear"

Coconut oil is the best moisturiser for eczema-prone skin.

Oh, and having your colours done is an absolute game changer!

A good, well cared for handbag and shoes makes an outfit look better (if you can't spend a fortune on everything).

Designer clothes are cut smaller than High St. stuff. I mean top designers, Chanel, Versace etc. not people who design for High St. shops and subsequently the clothing is called 'designer', like ex models, boxers, interior designers, train drivers etc.

This is just a list of what people thinks works for them. My tip is :-

No one else gives a shit what you wear or really notices what you look like so do & wear what makes you happy. Don’t follow shit lists on the internet.

I'm quite enjoying this thread (apart from the converse-can't-be-worn-by-over-40's twaddle!) My thoughts, for what they are worth are:

• Sunglasses and a bit of lip gloss / lipstick are a lifesaver. Only got 2 mins to get ready? Doesn't matter! Shove on your clothes, brush your hair, apply lip stick and sunglasses and you instantly look a bit more polished / glamorous. Ditto having a decent coat that covers a multitude of clothing sins underneath.

• Bob-basic clothes can be really lifted by just having one nice 'piece'. So just simple and comfy jeans and t shirt can look really good by just adding a statement necklace, a scarf, a cool bag, funky earings etc.

• Pay attention to the small stuff. Clean teeth, clean, shaped nails, clean hair goes a long way towards looking decent... and clean!

• Red lipstick. If I have a tough day ahead I sometimes wear red lipstick. It makes me feel like I'm badass and ready for anything. Silly I know!

• Don't give a shit about anyone else's opinion. If you love something then it will make you feel great wearing it.