Proposal!!! What is a big diamond?

[boobsboobsboobs]

My (soon to be) brother in law has asked for my help picking a ring for my sister for a post lock down proposal!

Obviously, we can only look online at the moment but it seems that some sites like blue nile offer quite good value and we hope to visit Hatton Garden when we can.

I know that she wants a big solitaire on a platinum band... but what is big?!

One carat? Two carats? Somewhere in between? Just looking for a general consensus.

I don't want to bring up rings now as it would be so out of the blue over the phone / FaceTime and I don't want to alert her

He has a decent budget so it would be balancing the size and the quality!

What’s his budget?

I think a one carat solitaire is a good size. You want the highest quality he can afford. It might also depend on the size of her hands.

It's £10,000. It seems like a lot but he has a decent job in the city and they are a little older so he's had time to save.

I think that's a lot anyway! I remember a thread on here once and someone's ring cost £22k!!!

What’s his budget?

How big is her hand?

Cut and clarity, colour and number of inclusions are all a factor. If you’re serious about it then you’ll need to balance the cut/clarity with size for the optimum diamond.

I know that she wants a big solitaire on a platinum band...

😳

I'm a bit uncomfortable that she wants a "big diamond." It makes her sound really greedy. Couldn't she just say she'd like a solitaire, and then he can go with his budget.

How big are her hands?! (Genuine question of she wants it to be wearable rather than an occasional showpiece)

Just to be clear - she hasn't said this to him! She said it to me - obviously over the years we've discussed what we like / don't like!

Be wary of platinum. It loses its shine after a bit. My wedding ring is platinum and pretty dull, as a bloke I think that's okay, but it might not work so well with a sparkly diamond. Others might have some advice.

I'm a bit uncomfortable that she wants a "big diamond." It makes her sound really greedy. Couldn't she just say she'd like a solitaire, and then he can go with his budget.

That was my first thought as well. It makes it sound that the engagement is all about the ring, and not a promise to get married.
I'm not a fan of big, showy rings, but that is just personal taste.

@Daftasabroom ok thank you! It could be white gold I think, I just know she prefers silver colour to yellow gold.

Good info, thank you!

White gold is a PITA as it had to be replated. Definitely go for an actual white metal.

I’d say anything 1 carat+ could be classed as big. More importantly what shape does she like?

For £10k in platinum he should be able to get 1.5 carats or more

@HermioneWeasley I haven't even thought about shape - I just assumed round but that's a very good point, thank you! Might have to do some digging!

You can gorgeous ethic white sapphires which are very beautiful and have a great lustre which is a much cheaper option if size if the main thing.

Sounds maybe like she wants a khardashian type thing 🤢

My engagement ring is about 1.2 carats, I think. It's not particularly big, but I don't think that's the only factor in diamonds. Mine is a good cut, so it looks quite sparkly.

*ethical

I think for £10K something a bit more exciting than a solitaire. Still each to their own. I think she needs to help to choose it. Otherwise it could be a very costly mistake.

I think ‘big’ depends on where you are in the country. Where I am most people have 0.5ct or less. Mine is 0.7ct so seems big, especially as I have a small finger (G) but it seems tiny when I’m in London.

For his budget he should be able to get something g between 1-1.5ct

Mines is platinum and still shiny - but you can get it polished

Definitely get platinum

If somebody was spending that much on a ring for me, I definitely wouldn’t want somebody else choosing it. Do you know for sure she’ll be happy with a surprise?? I’d hate it personally, unless it was really clear what style and design I liked. That’s a lot of money to get wrong.
I’d want the excitement of dressing up and making a day of it to go choose a ring.

Does she definitely want a ring chosen for her, rather than going on a joint ring shopping trip post proposal.

For that budget, I'd want to be wearing a ring I loved.

Also you can make things look bigger by the cut - I have a garnet cut flat and I get a lot of comments from people who think I have a whopper of a ruby, it so is not!

Get her something smallish and classy from eg www.johayesward.com/type/commitment-rings/
I'd kill for one of these

Platinum dulls, but just because it's soft and gets tiny scratches. Quick trip to the jewellers (and at that price she ought to keep an up to date valuation, and 'service' it!) and it'll look good as new. White gold needs replating when it gets dull, which is a different matter entirely.

And why don't we dial down the judgement. It's totally normal to talk about what you'd like in theory one day, and it so happens that her fiance can afford what she would like!

£10k is a chunk. I would defiantly go shopping. And trying on

I tried on lots of rings, bf at the time said we would have to wait as he could tell that what I liked and what he could afford wasn’t matching up. I protested and then I forgot all about it. And cue 6m later I got the big ring I thought we couldn’t afford

Things to think about:

If he goes too big it will look gaudy and will catch on things.

You can get a bigger diamond in less popular styles for less money. Try oval ones they are are just a step away from a classic round and can be much cheaper.

If she has an expensive watch, wedding ring and eternity ring she could end up with £30k of bling on her left hand.

What sort of wedding ring or eternity ring would she like?

If he gets it wrong it might be an expensive mistake....

It might be fun if she goes with him and chooses he can discuss his budget with a jeweller and they will select things in his price range.

It could be cheaper to select a diamond and have it set as well.

Just musings