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Original poster

Help! Dress Related! (Picture included)

94 replies

DM1209 · 01/02/2020 23:28

Hello all, I need help. I have a very high profile event to attend in the future.
Think corporate/legal/black tie/evening gown....

I usually avoid these events like the plague but this one I simply cannot get out of.

I have trawled and trawled the internet and stores in person, trying to find a dress and I'm at a loss. Out of all the dresses I have tried on, there is one that I like in terms of the cut, design and colour; but it shows too much cleavage in my opinion. I'm posting a picture of me wearing the dress, it really is too much boob isn't it?

Can anyone please help with something similar but less booby.
The dress(es) must be full length, have a sleeve and not entail me flashing my boobs!

For context I am 40 this year, mum to 3 DC and in a very serious career so I want to look professional and smart but not like a 'mum' and not like I've made zero effort but equally not like I'm falling out of my clothes trying to land a Judge!

Help! Sad

OP posts:
EnriqueTheRingBearingLizard · 01/02/2020 23:58

You just need the right underwear, a smile and the confidence to forget what you’re dressed in. Seriously the watch is all I could critique- you look amazing.

Original poster
DM1209 · 01/02/2020 23:58

@Xiaoxong, do you think I'll need those accessories too? I don't have a clutch purse, didn't even think of that, thank you for the advice.

I prefer keeping things plain and quite simple so wasn't going to wear any jewellery as such bar a pair of small studs. Should I rethink this?

I feel like such a buffoon! I can't put together a winning defence in an hour and wrangle 3 whiny children out of the door for 7.30am every morning, I can even change a tyre!! But this stuff, is killing.

Many people are also suggesting eye lashes, nails and everything that goes with that. I have never had my nails done, I keep them short and the idea of false lashes makes me rub my eyes before I've even done anything to them!

OP posts:
Original poster
DM1209 · 02/02/2020 00:00

@EnriqueTheRingBearingLizard, thank you. I'm usually a very self assured person and smile at everyone, even random strangers. But I feel like everyone else will be so polished and put together and I'll be there cock watching until I can get home.
But your words of advice are welcome and definitely help. Smile

OP posts:
Original poster
DM1209 · 02/02/2020 00:01

CLOCK watching!!!! I will be CLOCK watching!!! See people, this is me being social. Shock

OP posts:
OldGrinch · 02/02/2020 00:09
Grin
OldGrinch · 02/02/2020 00:12

And I absolutely love the dress it's beautiful

StuckBetweenDarknessAndLight · 02/02/2020 00:14

Cock watching eh? Oh dear OP!

I agree with others, you do look absolutely gorgeous in the dress. But I am conscious of being booby and usually wear a silk or lace chemise under anything showing more than a hint of cleavage. Don't ditch the dress, get a modesty panel as suggested. The rest is wowzer.

TheGirlWithAPrince · 02/02/2020 00:25

Daaaamn you look amazing!!!

Lampan · 02/02/2020 00:27

The dress looks great as it is. Maybe just add a clutch, some simple but dangly earrings and get your nails done for the event? You will look glamorous and sophisticated but not OTT.

Screamqueenz · 02/02/2020 00:29

That dress is gorgeous on you, and perfectly respectable (I go to a couple of white tie events and this would be perfectly acceptable for that).
Don't bother with a modesty panel it will just draw attention.

surelyitcantgetworsethanthis · 02/02/2020 02:01

Beautiful OP !! Absolutely stunning. Have fun cock watchingShock
What is a modestly panel ... lol

fastliving · 02/02/2020 02:21

The dress is lovely op but you have the sort of figure that would look good in anything, so if you feel slightly uncomfortable/self-conscious then I would wear something else it I were you.

(Can I ask why you would want to land a judge? Aren't they all old bastards? - I know women can be judges too, but in general they are old men no?)

LimpidPools · 02/02/2020 02:26

That's beautiful. I'll add my voice to the cacophony: Definitely no modesty panel! You're not 80 and that's definitely not a noteworthy amount of cleavage. And it would really ruin the whole look of it. Do make sure you get the right underwear though - a bra that keeps slipping into sight and that you're constantly aware of really will make you feel self-conscious.

I personally would just wear stud earrings too. Dangly ones feel a bit passé at the moment. Clean lines and simplicity seem a bit more elegant.

ShonaAndTheWaterHorse · 02/02/2020 02:36

I am a partner in a large, regional law firm. The dress is beautiful but unfortunately I agree with your own original assessment- it shows too much cleavage.

I don't think a modesty panel will work at att. What it needs , if possible, is for a dressmaker to try to bring the 2 sides of the bottom of the v together- even just a tiny distance might help.

MuchasSmoochas · 02/02/2020 02:37

It’s beautiful on you. I would let the dress speak for itself and not go too heavy on makeup and accessories. A light chain with a pendant quite high up. Knock them dead!

GeeUnit · 02/02/2020 02:48

It is really really lovely. Wear it indoors to get used to it.

Have a wonderful time cock watching Wine

7salmonswimming · 02/02/2020 02:59

These were my thoughts when I clicked on the photo:

Bloody hell she’s got a great figure

That’s a bit booby

The skirt bit is too long for that fabric, cheapens the dress which is tragic given how beautifully it fits you above the belt

What do you say to a very slick tux? Trouser suit with silk slip underneath, heels/stroppy sandals, fitted jacket? Hair up, dangly earrings, lipstick and mascara, clutch bag. It says “not available”, “look I made an effort”, “check out my amazing figure from far away!”

eurochick · 02/02/2020 06:24

It's a gorgeous dress and looks fab on you but I wouldn't wear something that shows that much cleavage to a work event. Plus it sounds like you would be really self-conscious with that amount of boob on show around colleagues.

(I'm a partner in a City firm so I've been to what sound like a few similar events over the years.)

SeaRabbit · 02/02/2020 07:23

I'm also a senior professional and agree that it is a lovely dress that suits you but is wrong for the event and a modesty panel would spoil it. If you're in London could you get a personal shopper involved?

MoltonSilver · 02/02/2020 07:44

You look beautiful but I agree about the cleavage for this particular occasion.

ImpossibleGirl86 · 02/02/2020 07:56

www.chichiclothing.com/chi-chi-charissa-dress/

www.asos.com/virgos-lounge/virgos-lounge-sheer-embellished-flutter-sleeve-maxi-dress-in-navy/prd/11388702?clr=&colourWayId=16340278&SearchQuery=long%20dress%20with%20sleeves

I think the dress looks beautiful on you but agree if you're not comfortable in it, you won't be able to relax in it, and that will show.

Kimbo1974 · 02/02/2020 08:00

You look amazing, head to accessorize for a clutch bag, forget the lashes!

flowery · 02/02/2020 08:07

You look wonderful but too low cut for this event, and you’ll be conscious of that and won’t relax.

similarminimer · 02/02/2020 08:16

What's your budget? I think you look fabulous but if you're not comfortable in your best pose on the mirror at home then usually it doesn't get better.

Girlintheframe · 02/02/2020 08:23

I think you look amazing!! I don't think the dress is too booby at all! Only thing I would say is that if you feel self conscious it's not going to work and your going to feel miserable, but IMO you look incredible.