Things you really want to wear but can’t because you look flippin’ awful!

[CarrieBradshawsScrunchie]

Roll necks. I know I look awful in them. I’ve known it for ever. But then I see Margo Robbie rocking a black roll neck in The Wolf of Wall Street and looking amazing, or I start musing how warm and cosy roll neck jumpers look for the winter... particularly those fitted, sleek ones, and before I know it I order a cute, red roll neck knitted dress from Boohoo at the miraculous price of £20 and it arrives and I try it on and it’s lovely in every conceivable way except for the roll neck ... which gives me the jawline of a very old and very angry witch.

I KNEW this. And now I feel sad and hideous I have to send it back.

Sigh. Anyone else have anything they’d LOVE to be able to wear but can’t. Ever. ?

Small strappy tops and dresses. Too much boob for those.

High waisted jeans- I look like a man who sits in the pub all day in those.

Any non v neck jumpers. I have wide shoulders and biggish boobs. Sadly, most jumpers in shops appear to be high necked.

I'm finding it harder to dress myself as I get older, I have more confidence to wear what I want but my options are getting smaller. I need better more expensive clothes to look good. Gone are the days of throwing on jeans and a tshirt

Skinny jeans. Only boot cut suits me but also fear I look mumsy. Straight leg look skinny. Skinny give me parsnip legs.

I don't really buy clothes, cos everything looks awful. But that's to do with my size at the moment (16) rather than anything else. I just see a fat person in the mirror.

Can't really identify with any celeb, what with currently bring a size 16.

Nothing. I'm pretty vain so most of the time, if I can see something doesn't suit me, I no longer want it. However one of my resolutions for 2018 is that if I do love something, I'm going to wear it regardless. The world will just have to put up.

PMSL at white=hospital gown. The "crisp white shirt" beloved of fash mags just makes me look uber frumpy and dull.

I've always been blessed with both a big chest and wide shoulders so I can't wear anything strapless, or floaty waify super feminine things nor can I do androgynous.

In my forties I've finally managed to just ignore most trends and stick with a few formulas that I know work.

I fell in love with the current micro trend of the slouchy pale pink roll necked sweater.Stunning on angular tall things - not on me. I resemble a pink marshmallow ... and it emphasises my tummy and boobs in totally the wrong way .Also high necks really annoy me and make me hot and sweaty.

Anything roll necked/ cowl necked/polo necked because I don't like the claustrophbic feeling (hot flushes)

Anything that cannot be worn with a scaffold-worthy bra

Anything boxy/cropped

Heels- I cannot bloody walk in a heel

Anything without a defined waist including biker jackets, swing dresses, most of Hush's catalogue.

I'm a perfectly good size 10 but hour glass. Cos is somewhere I'd like to shop but 9/10 things I try on look horrendous.

Shift dresses
Wrap dresses (look like I am trying to disguise nicking a sofa I have shoved up my dress!)
Long denim skirts
Basically anything! As I am busty and tummified and 5ft 4 ins.

Also a bit jowly so cannot wear any polo necks or roll necks - but hate anything around my neck anyway. If I have my hear up I look like a victorian cook!

I go to this shop [[https://www.skunkfunk.com/es Skunk Funk]] in the super-sales and pick up what i can 2nd hand. They are a bit nuts but interesting - i'd rather people thought 'ooh funky skirt' rather than 'oh dear, two pigs wrestling in a sack'.

I have just started exercising again regularly (it's been 26 yrs ) and very very slowly the bingo wings are getting less wingy and my posture is improving. It gives me confidence to wear my nutty clothes, with my 42yo 80% grey/white hair and face like a bag of spanners

Oversize jumpers make me look huge. I loved wearing 50s style dresses with a nipped in waist but they now look awful after 2 kids as my waist is now non existent.

One thing I've always really wanted to wear is the dropped waist, 20s type beaded dresses. So glam. Anything in that cut looks terrible on me as I'm very bottom heavy, if it fitted at the top there wouldn't be a hope of getting my bottom half in.

I live in empire line dresses and leggings.

Oh.....a dress. It makes me cry to type this. I'm 4 ft 11 and a size 18-20 with huge droopy boobs, a massive tum and the most hideous legs that look like upside down milk bottles. I wish for all the world I could look pretty in a dress.

Hats.

Of any kind.