Appearance

[crazykitten20]

Have you/do you worry about the way you look?

Your face/figure?

If you have, but don't now, how did you get over the worry?

I'm learning to not be concerned about others' opinions. It's a toughie , though 😳

It helps to cut out negative and toxic people from your life. Took me until my 40s to learn to do this.Luckily, I never had bullying about my looks, except being called lanky due to being long limbed as a child, so I don't understand the trauma that would cause. But I have been bullied in other ways: being called a slut because of how I looked, called stuck up, constantly rejected and used. My own mother, from whom I am ostracised, when I saw her after 15 years of no contact, called me a slut because I had children.
The only way is to cut out toxic people, surround yourself with those that have positive energy and learn to focus on your positive points.
x

I do, because I know I've 'lost it'.

When look back at photos of 20/30 years ago I see that I was actually really pretty (without wanting to sound like I love myself, far from it) and didn't realise it at all. Now after 10 years of being up twice nightly to attend to DD's medical needs I look and feel old. I'm only 51 so hardly past it but the last years of stress, worry, with a good dose of heartache thrown in, have aged me greatly. My appearance has taken the brunt of it.

OCSock. Love that! Must remember it.

WhatAHex. Yep, stress wreaks havoc with looks. No doubt of it. Stress over my son and my shocking relationship with youngest step daughter (now an adult) has aged me massively. I still look Ok from the neck up but Christ, from there down it's all a disaster. Am 55

rightknockered your DM sounds like a narcissist. Mine is too hugs

I wouldn't say I worry about how I look, but I would definitely say I care more now than ever (age 54). I don't care one hoot about other people's opinions though. I look back at the younger me in photos, and I realise now that I looked great, but I never thought so at the time. Too insecure, I guess.

Now I make a point of having my hair done regularly, nice make up, have found my own style in clothes and have never felt better, or felt I looked better. This getting older business has been the making of me - I feel free to look exactly as I want to - but with some wrinkles coming along for the ride! (and I like my wrinkles - I earned them all).

Deathraystare - I do wear make up, when I can be bothered, as I've got older, I've felt less inclined to wear it, the more I wear, the more it seems to age me! Then when I have made an effort to wear some - two hours later or if a rotten someone has snapped a pic of me - it doesn't even look as if I'm wearing make up, yet im sure I applied loads! I'd be too embarrassed to ask sil for help, I kind of feel like what's the point in trying to polish a turd!

But I do think it's true that most of us aren't happy with what we have. I had natural auburn hair when I was younger, hated it but was always told it was lovely by old ladies mainly! I dyed it black when I was 15 & it's been every colour since! I've more or less destroyed it now, wish I'd just left it alone! It is thick though, so I'm thankful for that at least! It could do with sorting out as it's a mixture of colours at the moment, browns, golden yellowy & dark brown & probably some ginger in there after whacking on a plum hair dye the other week that turned out an unfortunate black purple colour, I had to do an emergency vit c dye removal wash. But I've no pennies for a hairdressers so involved just having to brave it - if I wave it I suppose it won't look too bad, the colours will just blend in together I hope! If not just tie it back, job done!