I need a smart/posh/flattering/nice outfit. Need some serious help.

[MOIST]

I am a bit fat, and a windswept hippy. I live in leggings or jeans.

Have to go to a work award doo and need to look fabulous.

I'm not keen on dresses. Need legs hidden, and arms, and arse. I do go in at the waist and have decent boobs. I don't do heels.

I need help.

What's the occasion? You could consider a jumpsuit. I bought this one recenlty and liked it. You could go for flat sparkly silver sandals to go with it.

www.quizclothing.co.uk/clothes/00100010744.html

That is actually quite nice. My fatness worries me though. Would I look like a sausage?

On the jumpsuit theme: www.thehouseoffoxy.com/product/40s-style-veronica-jumpsuit-red think this would look very chic and HoF do stuff that really nips in at the waist!

Whenever I need a knockout outfit I always think vintage is best. Have you anywhere you can go. I think you'd suit a 50s cocktail dress, and not the replica vintage stuff. I got a gorgeous pure silk dress for £50 in a local antique shop. Might suit your hippy tendencies more than the high Street too. I love that my dress has a history.

This is mine. Would look a lot better if I had boobs and went in at the waist more, like you describe yourself. Legs, arms and arse covered!

That red is lovely, but I worry the wide legs would make me look stumpy and large all over.

However. Sunshine. That is lovely. I might investigate. What style would that be called?

Sorry. Vintage 50s cocktail?

Try bombshellHQ website - do great dresses for those with big boobs and not like wiggle dresses which can be a bit tight on the bum for those of us with ample bums as well as boobs

Ooooh. Lovely

What size are you? Tall or short?

Size 16. Was a 14 a few months back. and 12 last summer. (Knackered back)
5ft 7.

This dress could be really flattering. Would emphasise your waist and boobs but covers legs and bum. Tops of arms are covered too.

This wrap dress from dancing leopard is gorgeous. I love the blue but it also comes in red, green and a lovely rose print. The model has her legs out but you wouldn't have to stand like she is with your legs on show.
Would be great with your good cleavage, would totally hide your bum, arms and legs and the belt would emphasise your waist.

I think I need to be brave and go and try stuff on. I will need gin for that.

How about trying an Asian dress shop? Something on the lines of a shalwar kameez might suit you - or, at least, a silk pair of trousers with a tunic top that can be "pulled together" with a nice scarf. Such businesses often have lovely stuff for a dressy occasion.

Montalbano - that would be amazing - but being very white would i not look ridiculous?

That reads wrong. that style would be great, but would it look wrong? Me being quite clearly very white, British (in a very white British place).

That still sounds wrong

That's why I said "on the lines of". Loads of us wear Indian-inspired tops and suchlike when we dress casually. Especially if we're a bit hippyish. Going a step further could fit the bill!

An option I will look at.

I think I know where Montalbano is coming from....try muted neutral colouts in Indian textiles. Like this- www.theloom.in/collections/ethnic-vibes/products/grey-chanderi-top

Yes, I do see what you mean. I will have a look as that is what I need. Coverage but pretty, smart and flattering.

Plain black sleeveless jumpsuit with an embellished jacket- bolero type. Pretty shoes. Ta da!!

Have fun shopping

Wow OP you are getting some completely different ideas here.

I have to say the bardot jumpsuit, while cute, is not smart or posh and I don't think flattering on a larger figure. Potential for hoiking it up.

The red jump suit is lovely and the wide legs wont make you look wide. Very good for making you look taller and slimmer.

Shalwar kameez.........er, they are a bit left field. Very pretty but not smart or posh.

That wrap dress would be a disaster. You couldn't sit down. The fabric doesn't look very smart. It doesn't wrap around much, you'd be flashing all over the place.

Vintage is a great. However it depends how much time you have. You have to trawl a lot of shops to find something. Plus it's not always easy to find stuff in larger sizes. It's the kind of thing you have to look for all the time and pick up something when you find it even if you don't have the occasion. Kind of a hobby. When do you need it for?

Do you like Monsoon?
This dress has a vintage feel. Would be flattering on your figure. Should be good quality and a lovely colour
uk.monsoon.co.uk/view/product/uk_catalog/mon_1,mon_1.2/2436050908

There were quite a few other dresses on Monsoon and some jumpsuits.
or this one is a bit longer, darker and more coverage.
uk.monsoon.co.uk/view/product/uk_catalog/mon_26/2409890708

or if you like the idea of a tunic and trousers East do that kind of thing that looks a bit hippy.