How much damage does the menopause really do and how to fix it?

[busterhall]

At 40 I am not yet menopausal as far as I know. I love good skin and have always looked after mine and with that and some good genes so far I am doing ok and I am often told I look much younger or people are really surprised at my age when they find out.

What I am also told it that once the menopause hits I'll be hit with wrinkles and facial aging and that by the time I'm 50 we'll all be level.

Now I do accept aging and getting older etc but I still want to have the best skin possible and to avoid wrinkles and sagging for as long as I can.

I'm not into having fillers, botox or surgery but would consider lasers, radio frequency tightening, dermal needling etc as well as skincare, nutrition and supplemental treatments including HRT.

I would be really interested from others how the menopause affected them and the things they did that help them head off the worst effets especially those in the looks department?

Interesting that several posters mention their faces filling out - I always assumed older faces were gaunter even if you were heavier.
I'm 46 and on the cusp of a big overhaul. I'm a moderately healthy person but can see that without some diet and lifestyle changes, I'm going to age faster than I'd like. My mum didn't age quickly after menopause, she was still being taken for significantly younger when in her 70s. She did have cheekbones like coat hangers though.

To be honest after a few v stressful years I've invested in skilful fillers - has taken about 8 years off me . I never thought I'd feel so pleased - for now it's a good option .

Eleanor, make-up does improve looks, but sadly, it doesn't make us look younger. Botox is the way forward for some, but not for me, I think?!

Hope you're ok.

I divorced 3 years ago which has done wonders for my self esteem. I have a new partner, amazing sex and am retiring next year. My sex drive has gone through the roof 😀
Kids at university, no elderly parents to worry about and virtually no stress. I think that makes a huge difference.

Can I ask something?
I'm 43 and came off the mini pill last summer.
Since then my periods have been very easy to manage and with absolutely no pain.
(I was on the pill due to severe period pain)

My cycle was 23 days after I stopped the pill.

I had to take the MAP 2 months ago and did have a period that came late (I also did a pregnancy test just to reassure myself)

I've not had a period since. I'm 11 days late.

I have no other menopausal symptoms apart from zero sex drive recently.

How does the menopause start.

Is it all hot flushes? Is it really obvious?

I think some people notice more than others. My periods stopped but I didn't get any other noticeable symptoms for a couple of years, then the flushes kicked in, then the panicky feelings, then the exhaustion, and finally, the vaginal atrophy.

Trouble is, it's hard to differentiate between getting old and the meno. They're part and parcel of each other, up to a point.

...and I've had a dodgy bladder since dd was born 15 years ago.

It wasn't obvious for me at the start, ihate. My periods tailed off very gradually, over several years. The early symptom I remember most was not sleeping - sometimes I literally lay awake all night. Hot flushes came later - at least I think they did but one of the other symptoms is poor memory so I wouldn't even trust that!

I think it's different for everyone but, because we don't talk about it much, it's hard to say what's typical. GPs can do a blood test.

I've never had a good memory, but this past year it has been almost non-existent - only now improving. Could this be my first sign of menopause? As I said above, I've been through a very emotional time recently, so I've kind of put it down to that, but maybe it's the menopause?

A friend of mine hasn't had a period for just over 2 years and her GP has told her that she's now through the menopause. She hasn't had any menopause symptoms & her GP has said that she probably won't because she exercises regularly and is very fit.

My periods suddenly became heavier aged 47/48. I had a run of UTI's over the course of 18 months +. Then, periods became lighter and irregular. By 52, I started flushing which I put up with for a year or so but when it was disturbing my sleep and I was beginning to feel rundown I saw my GP for HRT. I'm now nearly 55. Still on HRT. No flushing. No period for 2 years+ It's only now, in a "post" position, that I'm noticing real changes in physical appearance (hair/skin/energy).

It's not all bad. id rather read a good book than get dolled up and go to the pub!

I don't want to minimise the importance of exercise but that sounds like a strange thing for a GP to say. Of course being fit is important but it won't stop your hormone levels dropping through the floor.

Floisme, that's what I thought as well, but he is an absolutely brilliant GP & I want to believe him! ! Time will tell for me......

I'm finding facial yoga helps for jowls.
Good skincare regime is really important.
I now take loads of vitamin supplements. Never noticed them helping in the past, but they do now.
Use loads of lipbalm as lips thin.
Hair thinned badly but MN recommended Elvive Thickening shampoo which is absolutely brilliant and has put it back where it was. (I know it's that, as I use another one occasionally and my hair goes thin and limp again.)

Want2 It's certainly easier to deal with some of the symptoms if you're in good health to begin with. And exercise did help with my sleeplessness. I just question the idea that being fit can actually prevent symptoms when the changes are basically hormonal. But I'm no medic and it's different for everyone - fingers crossed for you!

My understanding is that estrogen is to an extent protective (calms inflammation ) and without it underlying weaknesses are revealed
However, there are also health advantages to reduced estrogen levels as we get older, this is why humans have evolved to have menopause
This view is heretical to many
menopause and the fact that only a few species have it is an interesting subject imo

"I just question the idea that being fit can actually prevent symptoms when the changes are basically hormonal."

Do very fit women suffer less from PMT, etc. That would suggest being very fit could help you cope with the symptoms of hormone changes.

I doubt that there has been enough research to answer that question, relatively few people exercise sufficiently and consistently over a period of many years to put them in the very fit category

europepmc.org/abstract/med/26205766

higher BMI was related to higher PMS symptoms. Cardio respirarory fitness was the strongest predictor of physical and psychological symptoms of PMS

53 and in the full throes of menopause here. Definite weight gain round the middle has been the worst thing. Had lots of urine infections but HRT seemed to help with that and vaginal atrophy. Not much difference in skin to be honest.

What is vaginal atrophy?

ihatethecold

Periods getting more frequent is quite common in the early stages of the menopause. Also very heavy periods. Then they become irregular and more widely spaced. And finally they stop. Not everyone has this but it's quite a common pattern. Hot flushes tend to start once you are some way into the whole process. They are worse for some people than others. There are other symptoms as well but these are the main ones.

Vaginal atrophy sets in once your periods have definitely stopped. Lack of oestrogen makes the vaginal walls thin, dry and inflexible. It's common to experience pain/burning sensations at the beginning of and after penetrative sex. General all-round dryness and itchiness, UTI infections and pelvic floor weakness are also involved. It's lovely -- and doctors hardly ever mention it. If you don't want to (or don't need to) take HRT you can get oestrogen vaginal pessaries which are great. The only downside is that you have to go and explain to your doctor that you have painful sex

I'm not much of a skin care person because I am too tight don't want to spend all the gazillions of money that posh skin care would cost. I don't drink very much, try to walk everywhere and keep the circulation going, and smile a lot, and that seems to help with the sagginess.

Mostly I put my money and effort into dressing as well as and as interestingly as I can. A lot of my work is with elderly people (ie in their 70s and upwards) and I know that ultimately I will look old and there's not much I could do to hold back time. But I can always wear nice clothes and keep thinking about what suits me and looks unusual and interesting. Skincare always strikes me as a chore but clothes are much more fun, and that's something we need a lot as we get older.

Apparently it's a,thinning of the walls of the vagina. I'd never heard of it until I saw it on Gransnet.

I've Googled and I'm convinced I have it! It causes dryness, spotting blood after sex, thinning pubes, soreness. I think it may be the cause of my OB too.

Apparently it's more likely to occur in women who have had CSections.

Niminy, what you said about clothes is exactly what crossed my mind today. Great minds and all that!

X-post! Much better explanation from niminy.

Getting old is such fun!

I have found taking calcium magnesium and potassium helps with aging and I have always been very vigilant with a good skincare regime no matter how skint I am I always prioritise it. I swear by Liz Earle's hot cloth cleanser and their superskin rollerball at night.

Not having my hair too long or too curly has helped from aging point of view. (I am 53) and not having it too dark either as my skin is quite pale. I use my Ghd Hair Styler to keep my curly locks as straight as I can as I look younger that way.

It is more energy I am battling with I don't think it is how I look! I have just bought an iron supplement that is slow release with folic acid and B12 in. It is the fatigue that seems to be the issue with me just recently and with getting my periods every 3 weeks it just isn't pretty. I have always drunk plenty of water and rarely drink. I juice 4 - 5 times weekly too so really do try quite hard to maintain good health.

I too worry about my jowls so when I remember at night I will pop a bit of Estee Lauder's face mask Resilience Lift Extreme to give them a wee lift just on that area and it soaks into the skin. I recently tried experimenting with gently slapping my jowls to see if that helped a bit like giving them a mini facial. I think I need to ask a beautician's advice on that one!!

I had never thought about sagging chin blimey something else to worry about now isn't it!!

I agree with the notion of fasting although seldom see to it but it can definitely give our health a mini boost.

Luckily my mum did not look her age so I am hoping I will enjoy the same genetic advantages so fingers crossed!