The Crepe Escape

[herbaceous]

New thread!

Title can refer either to our upcoming holidays, or our upcoming fleeing from the Bojo-led charabanc of doom.

A friend in her performance review told her very senior boss that she intends to emulate politicians going forward and give up when the going gets tough or something is too hard, whilst stabbing everyone in the back as she goes down....... Sounds like a strategy to me...

MrsS perhaps we could swop -SMT are worse than useless here. All demands but no decisions.

Here ds's school have OFSTED in (bet the head is loving the timing of that).

Stropps hope the back gets better - well less painful!

BD Ofsted at this end of term. Kids might be in for a panto of pretending to work when I bet all work has gone out of the window as it's the last week. Although I cannot afford to do that at my place as any change to routine causes mayhem!

Sorry to hear of all the horrible back pain/woes at work/feeling crap, etc, etc I hope the summer hols will be restorative for you all.

CV, I loved that story of your friend. I have a lovely colleague who is similarly upbeat and positive and it is inspiring.

MrsS, is the boss that is barely speaking to you that colleague?

Yes, BTM.

Oh. Do you have any idea what has prompted his change of attitude?

I think his boss has said something to him. I think that I and my colleague have already been singled out for being in the 10% at our grade for getting a "bottom box" appraisal (it is mandatory where I work that this happens). Being two people short in my team and having had a raft of health issues won't be taken into consideration, apparently. And the appraisal year has just started...

Oh dear, that sounds tough

We have three boxes, basically top box means you are amazing, second box means you are doing OK and third (bottom) box means Could Do Better/Must Improve.

BASTARDS, MrsS.

CV, your friend does sound amazing.

I have been for a sunny Ladyjog and am going to get on with work. DP has nobly agreed to meet my dad for lunch on Sunday when he comes through London - I can't as am singing - but although this is NOT COMPULSORY he is now being grumpy and martyred. I'd forgotten that his very posh bro and SIL are in the UK this weekend and we have to see them (no Legoland this time at least). Pointed out to him they will require presents, which gave me considerable sadistic pleasure as I don't think it had occurred to him.

Annoying, though. Because we could have got the kids some nice Londony Tshirts and trad sweets, and shopped the penhaligons sale for SIL...oh well not my problem. Ha.

MrsS Surely any decent employer would look at a range of reasons for a "Bottom Box" rather than pointing the finger...short staffing and staff wellbeing (or the lack to it) at the top of the list. Tossers. Is your colleague blaming you, do you think?

Not at all CV. Its inspirational to hear about your friend and reminds us all not to sweat the small stuff, of which I am very much guilty at times.

lalsy

How's the back/sciatica Stropps ?

I need some advice *Crepeys. I have a direct opportunity to see the new AD at the theatre to talk about my "field" and get an audience with him on trying to make some of the improvements I have been dying to make for years, and keep being stonewalled over in the nicest, possible way
i just keep hesitating because of the fear of going over the heads of the staff with whom I usually deal . I don't want to cast aspersions over their work (they will get defensive, I have no doubt, and they are nice people but completely unqualified and don't I think quite share my vision, more through lack of knowledge than anything else...). How do I deal with this...have I no choice but to risk the stable (ish) relationship I have with the staff for the greater good. It doesn't help that I still have the status of "volunteer" although I was (eventually) paid for the last lot of sessions I did there. Any wise thoughts....?

MrsS how on earth can you have an appraisal system where 10% HAVE to be marked as failing..... ?!?

Here we have four boxes and 'meeting expectations' had a grade descriptor along the lines of 'met all objectives, but adds little of value' - I kid you not....

Mrs s what a load of old cobblers. Boss boy is the one who needs to do a bit of work in bringing the team together, setting realistic targets and maintaining morale. He's the one who is supposed to be taking responsibility and taking an overview, not pettily blaming his team and belittling them. Sounds like there has been some kind of top down squeeze and of course the people doing the actual work are the ones who get blamed for all sorts . Bottom box be damned. It does sound a bit rude though or is it just me?

Tis the Glorious Twelfth or Orange Fest as it is now called (wtf) am holed up in house away from parades , bonfires and bowler hats. it is best excuse for a duvet day I know.

Rose, am pondering your conundrum. I've just had my knuckles rapped for something else...

Cremo, I too was sniggering at Bottom Box. I snigger even more when I see Bottom Lash Mascara.

Rose, I think that you are perfectly at liberty to have an 'at large' conversation with the new AD, especially if you can dress it up as him asking you for a conversation. I suspect he'll have lots of those conversations, coming into a new job and then he can decide what actions he wants to go ahead with.

If anyone questions you on why you met or what you discussed, just play it down, 'oh, he just wanted to catch up on what I'd been doing....blah blah blah', then breeze off. Pecking orders and hierarchies tend to get a bit shaken up when new people arrive (which is a good thing), but it means everyone gets a bit ruffled and suspicious.

Bottom Box is a wonderful phrase and if weren't already so profligate in bagsying MN usernames, I would have that one.

I would be tempted to joke about it constantly at work, however, eg by signing all emails to the Boss: MrsBottomBox. Being bottomboxed because of illness is fucking shite.

Rose - what Beachy said. Keep it light and chatty, but make the points you want to make.

Lalsy - I don't know what challenges life is throwing you, but hope you are keeping your head above water.

BD - awful time for Ofsted. Our primary school seemed to attract the inspectors at the worst possible times - once during Red Nose Day, so the whole teaching staff were trying to look serious while wearing ridiculous outfits and face paint, once when half the school were away on trips, and once during horrendous snow, when less than a quarter of the kids showed up (and even the inspector didn't make it on the second day).

MrsS - how demoralising. I think you need to drag your boss aside and have an honest discussion to get things out in the open or the simmering will just continue. Alternatively, try the kick in the nuts / machete approach. I hated formal appraisals, although there is a need for them in large organisations. We have none here but no career progression either

I forgot to say thanks for the free/cheap recommendations for SF/LA. The restaurant (mentioned by Magi, possibly??) looks excellent, and not far from our hotel. I have told the DCs they will be making extensive use of the hotel buffet breakfasts, and if they wish to live on Taco Bell for a fortnight, they are quite welcome. Actually, we have about six nights with self-catering facilities, and there's nothing nicer (and cheaper) than rooting about in a forrin supermarket for supplies.

Roll on, end of term! DD1 is doing business week at school (business games, mock interviews etc), for which they have to dress appropriately. She has a stretchy black mini skirt which she has paired with a selection of my less heinous work blouses. DD2 is staging a performance of Joseph in a week (Y8 do this every year), and DS continues his post-exam loafing, although he has recently become hooked (along with the rest of the western world) on this new Pokémon Go game, so he went off to Brighton yesterday with friends to catch some new species. Meanwhile I keep plugging away....

Gosh CV they don't have pack in a lot at the end of term. You must be on your knees. I hope the trip to the US comes quickly.

Mrs S , a quiet word with BottomBoxBoss, might be the way to go. I would stick completely to statements of fact repeated as needed, and stay away from pleading and cajoling.make it as impersonal as possible and sling it to him as a parting shot that morale and atmosphere are at their lowest point and Something Must Be Done.

Rose, hope chat with AD goes ok. Maybe try and pretend that your ideas are really his ideas. Fluff up his ego a bit.

I am dreading this weekend in Glasgow. (dreading it) dd is being brattish and ungrateful and Dh is really depressed about his and her relationship. It's going to be so difficult. Aaaargh!

I have been to lay flowers at grave of friend who took her own life in 2012. I feel utter fury at the futility of it. She should be here, now, having a few wines on the sofa, watching crap on telly.

CV you think because there is formal appraisal there is career development?
Yes I think sports day was deliberately cancelled because of OFSTED but one does wonder about the futility of it all...

Cremo :( re weekend. Hope it's not as awful as you predict.

I'm going to see how round x of teen angst is going tonight having studiously not discussed it with father of other child this morning.

This weekend dp and ds do HyperJapan whilst I spend time with dad....

Thank you crepeys for a bracing read. No time to post except to say, what Beachy said, Rose. And CV, I agree. Your tale of postivity hit not one bum (bottom box) note.

I had Pokemon Go explained to me this morning. DD1 is going on a quest locally.

Zumba tonight. Then on to hang out with my DMum.

Second job rejection of the day. This one was a small regular gig I really WANTED.

I quite want to cry.

Oh MI, . What a shame. Small regular gigs such handy legs for freelance.

Crem, I hope the weekend is better than you fear - any chance she is being like this because there is something she now thinks you are right about?

Back in the day, when I had targets, I was expected to commission a certain value of books even though my list had pretty well gone to the US. Not sure these things ever had any logic, they are a smokescreen for weasels.

Much less wobbly, thanks all. Although seem to be having metaphor issues.

I like 'smokescreen for weasels'. Have just realised DD2 has dented her sax. Oh joy, more to sort out AND PAY FOR.

Am off for a haircut in the hope of looking less like Hillary Clinton's shorter fatter sister.

Well, I say we don't have any career progression.....and then Hands Off Boss called me in this afternoon to ask if I'd like to a) go full time, and b) be IT Manager. Yikes. The role wouldn't require me to be madly technical, but it would be more driving the strategy, designing the systems, being proactive rather than the current reactive blah blah.....but Eeeek! Aaargh! I am going to do some research and look out some training courses, then let him know later in the week if I think I'm up to it. It would be in addition to everything else, but he gave me the impression that he'd look to farm out some of the more "junior" stuff I do to an assistant.

Of course, my immediate thought was "I can't I can't I can't" so I have given myself a stern talking-to. Maybe I will decide that indeed I can't (or don't want to), but I am going to explore the options thoroughly first, and not write myself off straight away.

CV you so CAN! (And you can pick my addled IT brain if you like, and Cremo's DH is in that line of work,,,)

I am waiting for the next work reshuffle which I suspect is imminent.

Also trying to be nice to myself and my body and stop trying to drown it in alcohol ...

That's dismal MI Don't lose heart and more importantly don't lose confidence....or you'll end up like yours truly who's having a veritable breakdown over said conundrum up thread.
Thanks for the wise words Beachy and all others....the ball's in my court having met the AD socially twice and it came up in conversation. Should I say anything in advance to the staff members concerned? (one is an assoc. prod. and the other is HerrD God help me....)

CV you most certainly can do it with aplomb. The question is, (as you say....)...do you want it?

MrsS I suggest you put all the male members (!!!! ) in the so called Bottom Box as they are clearly a bunch of arses...

DS1 is back safe and sound in Sydney. DS2 and DH are going tonight to a memorial service of the much- loved drummer of the theatre band who has just passed away, (aged 37) sadly. I am a little not to be going but it's too raw what with DDad and all. AND we are packing for Switzerland. Departure T - 36 hours....