Help!

[josephwrightofderby]

OK, so at the weekend I got an invite from a very old school friend to his wedding in mid December. Haven't seen him for years, but he used to be a very good mate and I do need to go.

I'll be catching up with loads of people I haven't seen in years. In fact, it will be a bit like a high school reunion. My exP will also be there.

PANIC!

I know everyone will say 'Just be yourself'. But here's the thing. Last time I saw these people I was well, fit, thin, happy and pretty. Since then, I have been ill (long term, 2 years out, now better) and I look fat, frumpy and distinctly a mess. I am in my late 30s, and my combination skin is traced with fine lines, while also still getting the occasional spot.

I know that it's too little time to do much, but I would like to just look a bit better to salvage a little bit of dignity. What can I do?? I am completely clueless and own almost nothing make-up and beauty wise that isn't 4-5 years old.

Just don't forget that everyone else will have aged as well!

Yes, remember they will all be older too! But if you really want to make some changes you could:

• probably lose 1/2-1lb a week without particularly killing yourself, more if you do a dramatic diet (lots of advice on the weight loss boards)
• drink lots of water - skin plumping and flushing of toxins etc
• eat your 5 a day, or preferably more - my skin is always miles better when I do this (probably because of the crap I am not eating rather than any actual benefits from extra fruit and veg)
• get into a decent skincare routine if you don't have one - doesn't need to take hours
• sort your hair and eyebrows
• buy an outfit that makes you feel good at the size you are, not one that you need to lose 5lb a week to get into.

Oh, I do realise about everyone ageing (in these days of social media, that's easier to follow!). But there's a difference between the natural process of sliding from your early to your late 30s and the havoc that is wreaked by medical drugs, surgery, loss of hair - not to mention that I had two years of comfort eating before I even started treatment because it was literally the only thing I could actually do!! People who meet me after a long absence do a doubletake. I look so different now.

I realise I can't turn back the clock. I really do. But I want to appear with dignity, and it would do my self-esteem a lot of good just to feel a bit better about how I look. I am completely clueless about beauty, which doesn't help. I would love to have that flawless alabaster look on my skin, but I have no idea how to achieve it.

I hear you on the diet and the water - I have started both of those today, and I will do a bit of gentle exercise every day too, gradually building this up. Eyebrows are done, but hair needs doing.