Looking your best as you approach 40...

[dontcryitsonlyajoke]

So I've got a year to go to my 40th. My 30s has been all about huge changes - physical, emotional and career - due to 4 pregnancies, 3 babies, 3 years of breastfeeding and associated weight loss and gain.

The birth of my youngest a year ago brought unbelievable sleep deprivation and has aged my face significantly. I used to look young for my age but I look every day of my 39 years now!

I want to hit my 40s in a much better frame of mind - it's going to be the selfish decade where I reclaim a lot of "me".

So I want your tips on how to get myself looking and feeling better. The baby steps I've made so far are:

1. Good cleanse/serum/moisturise routine in place for the last 2 years but nothing more - no variants beyond my morning and night routine
2. finally found a hairstyle that suits and I think I can keep
3. started filing and clear varnishing my bitten-for-30-years nails so they're starting to look better (though still very weak
4. 2 litres of water most days
5. good exercise routine

What else would you suggest I do?

pavlov Is it 0.05? Perhaps get the 0.025 you can use the stronger stuff in a couple of months. Or just put it on once a week and see how you go. It will take up to 10 months for full effect so be patient although I have seen good improvements in my skin straight away. The hydraulonic acid goes on before moisturiser.

yes 0.5. I do have a bad spot problem though. GP says acne, I am not sure as it's on one side of face in one area only. Will it be ok to use on that area?

So hydrauluric (still can't spell it!) acid on after washing face, before moisturiser? How about the Retin A cream - before moisturiser once a week? A night before bed? Or in the morning?

Head spins. I am so rubbish at anything beauty related but so, so need it. My body generally is relatively ok looking (not internally, my spine is that of a 70 year old...) but my face. Oh man, i've aged 10 years in the last 2

I meant to say, I'll get the 0.25 first. How often should I use that? every other day?

You can buffer the 0.05. Either put some moisturiser/oil on your face first or mix the retina with moisturiser/oil and put on face!

Start with just a couple of times week and build up. The ideal is to be able to use everyday with irritation.
I have the strongest strength and can usually get to 4 days straight before needing a break.

Can any of the retin A users tell me if it's good for crow's feet? Approaching 40 and they happen when I smile, not at rest. Not keen on botox (yet). Will retin help or should I give up smiling
Thanks for any thoughts/experience. Just suffering from seeing an ex who has massively upgraded to someone 10 years younger and I feel so crumpled...
Oh and any miraculous hair restoring ideas! Mine is falling out in handfuls. All the baseline checks done and taking iron but the shedding is crazy. Thanks for such an informative thread OP.

Thanks for starting this thread OP - I'm also 39, 40 in December, I work 25 hours a week and have 2 DCs (11 and 7).

I've really noticed everything starting to go a bit wrong in the last year or so. I have a hairstyle which suits my face shape but no fringe and I am aware of the lines on my forehead - DH says they aren't noticeable but am considering getting a fringe cut back in. Other thank that, I have small fine lines around my eyes and am using Rosehip Oil and L'Oreal Revitalift Magic Blur, which suits me okay the moment.

An elderly Uncle told me I was very rosy a few weeks back (Grr) and I guess I am - dark hair, pale skin - and I do go redder in the hear. Have just started wondering if I should use a colour corrector for this so any recommendations for a good one would be great!

I also need to lost about 2 stone - I find it hard to diet though and as DH works shifts, it's hard to do any regular fitness class. I have noticed that my knees hurt (always had issues with them) and I worry about every little health thing now.

My hair also feels like it is thinning a little as lots seems to fall out when I shower. My hairdresser says it's fine but it just feels a bit less full.

I have to say, I'm hating being almost 40 - I can't embrace it and have told everyone I don't want a fuss made on my birthday!

pavlov use retin a 20-30 after washing face at night. You face has to be completely dry or it will become irritated.
misslemons I'm pretty sure retin a doesn't help with dynamic face lines although it may soften them slightly. I have the same problem I think fillers and botox sort those out. I don't mind about those lines too much, as long as I look fresh in the stationary position!

The Internal Exercises help very well with thickening your hair. You just place your fingertips either side of your central parting then press gently for 10 secs. then massage in the same place for 10 secs. Do that 3 times at night and or whenever you've got the time. Do the same at the back of your scalp - put your thumbtips at the place your spine meets your skull and spread the rest along the side of your head.

The above also stops your hair falling out if you persevere . Honest

Thanks ppeat and hacked off, there is hope then. .

The above posts have been helpful - thank you. I am well into my 40s and maybe I could be fitter, dye my hair and so, on but I find enjoying life keeps me young. Traveling, being interested in others. If you to learn something new everyday the wrinkles will stay away.

I am liking the Hylamide stuff so far. If I was to do retin a again too then I guess it would go: wash face, wait 20 mins, retin a, wait 20 mins, Hylamide, then moisturiser? Doable if I start when the kids go to bed

I was feeling so much better before the school hols, as I had lost weight and was doing lots of exercise. I am only 4lb heavier but feel so flabby. Back to it now.

Hi. Just spotted this thread and I'm marking my place to come back and read properly later.
I will be 40 next summer and have been making considerable changes to skincare and exercise for the past 6 months. I'd like to be a stone lighter and settle at that weight and be much more toned by my birthday.
Hoping to share some good tips on here.

MrsFruitcake If you want to lose some weight

1. Give up fruitcake!!! but it bloats me and I don't even have it at Xmas, very occasionally maybe Simnel cake at Easter!

2, Don't eat a big meal after 7.30ish.p.m.

1. Eat ONLY when you're hungry. Exercise before breakfast.

1. Look at Paul Mackenna ,I lost 3 stone with his way of eating it's brilliant.

5,Careful with any caffeinated or fizzy\chemically sweetened drinks. Drink water ot herbal teas when you feel hungry , just in case it's thirst.

1. Try not to eat heavy protein and carbs at the same meal. e.g. turkey and plenty of salad\green veg. good. but turkeyburger not good.

1. Eat fruit on an empty stomach.

The above all work well. IME.

I'm home from hols - still reading and learning from this thread, and now started on my plans. Paying particular attention to skincare, off all sugar and white carbs, veg to the fore, planning my autumn fitness regime in.

For people struggling to find time for exercise, try to book lots of sessions in your calendar. I plan 5 things a week, most weeks I then achieve 3 with ease, usually a 4th, very occasionally all 5. So I'm able to drop something due to circumstance without it really affecting my fitness goals. I do work freelance 2 days a week with childcare which helps me schedule admittedly, and DH and I do one thing the same (once in class one evening where we tag team due to their being 3 classes per evening, and then once together at home) At the weekend he cycles while I manage the 3 DC and then I run. A little healthy competition (I'll never beat his strength, but I can progress up the weights quicker or aim for more reps at my ideal weight than him) with your DP can really help

Hyurolic acid orally? or on the skin?""

I've started using face masks that I bought as a job lot off Groupon, ends today, £6 for 10, I also use Nib and Fab occasionally.

I started this because I couldn't really afford the £60 facials that I love, but I'm getting the same results, I use Aldi Serum on top of my Elemis routine.

I went Vegan, but you could just try clean eating, started exercising daily, when my menopause symptoms were really bad, I've lost five stone and seen a dramatic difference in my skin, on my body as well as my face.

I'm 47. There was a thread in AIBU and changing your eating/lifestyle really does mean that you don't have to have to have middle aged spread and poor energy levels.

I think keep reassessing what suits you, rather than "I need to do A, because I am Byrs old". For instance, I have dyed my once very dark but now very silver hair lighter as my eyebrows are no longer so black so it looked too harsh. I now use a brow pencil too, but any suggestions for brow makeup gratefully received!

Only adjust things you need to.

I agree that if you feel young, fit and happy you will probably project it. It's about feeling happier in your skin.

Wow, 5 stone Birdsgottafly ! I agree that lots of healthy food really helps. I have always eaten lots of veg, drunk loads of water and worn sunscreen, so think those are in my favour.

I also like using pinterest for images of stylish older women.

MrsFruitCake You don't need to go to an exercise class- a daily walk of 30-45 mins (ideally with some hills or gradients) is as good and a set of lightish dumb bells to use at home are effective. or a DVD 3 times a week.

Your knees hurt because of your weight, so you're right to be concerned.

Also- MrsFC you might like to see your dr about having your thyroid tested weight gain, dry skin and falling hair can be the result of deficiencies in your diet but also a low thyroid.

I do my exercise gardening, houseworking, dancing to the radio before breakfast and those tui na exercises that I mentioned. I don't run or go to a gym Plus I follow the Paul mackenna I Can make You Thin way of eating which is effective.

Did I say i've lost nearly 3 stone doing the above ? I'm not thin just slimmish (A vanity size loose 10). Which is fine when you're my age.

I have the Paul McKenna somewhere sat on a shelf, but I would like to change my relationship with food.

Maybe read it Bigbuttons because that's exactly what it does

I will ppeatfruit I also ordered that book of yours that I found. so thanks for the heads up on those !

I am trying to drink more water. but it makes me pee more, and is especially worse at night. I have a bladder the size of a thimble! Over the years I have naturally reduced my water intake to address the problem, without realising I was doing it, then found out I have one (big) kidney a few years ago, and apparently I need to be drinking more water than the average person. If I did that I might as well move into the bathroom .

Bigbuttons

Pavlov I 'train' myself to pee less and it works esp. if you tighten the pelvic floor regularly to help the muscles 'down there' . IIRC camomile tea is calming for kidneys not coffee and normal tea !

I didn't say I'm into herbals as well did I?

I'm a couple of years shy of 40 and didn't look it until a few months ago, but I seem to have aged years in that time. In particular I have got those vertical wrinkles between my eyes and my hands are looking their age...

I'm going to order some retin A and see how I get on with that, but any recommendations for decent hand creams / treatments?