Looking your best as you approach 40...

[dontcryitsonlyajoke]

So I've got a year to go to my 40th. My 30s has been all about huge changes - physical, emotional and career - due to 4 pregnancies, 3 babies, 3 years of breastfeeding and associated weight loss and gain.

The birth of my youngest a year ago brought unbelievable sleep deprivation and has aged my face significantly. I used to look young for my age but I look every day of my 39 years now!

I want to hit my 40s in a much better frame of mind - it's going to be the selfish decade where I reclaim a lot of "me".

So I want your tips on how to get myself looking and feeling better. The baby steps I've made so far are:

1. Good cleanse/serum/moisturise routine in place for the last 2 years but nothing more - no variants beyond my morning and night routine
2. finally found a hairstyle that suits and I think I can keep
3. started filing and clear varnishing my bitten-for-30-years nails so they're starting to look better (though still very weak
4. 2 litres of water most days
5. good exercise routine

What else would you suggest I do?

bigbuttons I didn't say acupuncture gives you firm boobs, If you read my post properly you will see what I said.

I don't do links because of the hacking problem. But it stands to reason if you are having something pumped into a small area of your face it will stretch the place concerned and it wears off, spreading into the rest of your body, the stuff they use isn't nice either.Unless you pay a lot. Then continue to redo it for the rest of your life and end up looking like a weird doll. No thanks.

Agree about the magazines. BUT I was very surprised to read to an anti botox article in one of them. Even they are realising the damage they're doing.

Oh, I must have misunderstood your post.it is deep tissue massage often linked with acupuncture, yes?
Massage is certainly good for the skin, I agree with that, as to any lasting lifting effects, no I don't agree. Massage of the skin helps stimulate and can increase collagen production. Some people have reported a skin lift when they have had a facial, yes, but the results, however pleasant, are short lived.

No, botox does not stretch the skin any more than heavy duty massage stretches the skin.. Tiny amounts of chemical are injected which relax the muscles, it doesn't make the underlying tissue swell at all.

You are happy with what you are doing,fine, but you are seriously misinformed on other areas.

Oh tell that to the women who can't speak through their fat flobby lips. Misinformed or not, Vogue's recent article was suggesting that Botox is not such a
wonderful thing.

I don't do deep tissue massage. I do tui na which is knowing the meridian line endings of my body and pressing in gently for 10 secs. then (also gently) moving my forefinger on the spot for 10 secs. Of course it has to be repeated but it costs nothing and does no damage (which is more than you can say about botox and related anti aging stuff).

I don't think flobby lips are botox though. They are fillers. I think they always look awful personally and have ruined many a face.
Your routine sounds interesting. What do you you use it for specifically?

I'm in my mid 50s and I'm often mistaken for being younger. My advice is:

1. Don't be underweight as it makes your face look far more lined. Try not to be very overweight by eating a normal diet of three meals a day and avoiding fads and food trends.

1. Don't smoke or drink loads of alcohol.

1. Avoid sitting in the sun and wear face cream with spf protection.

1. Don't be afraid to wear bright colours and know which styles flatter your figure.

1. Get some exercise every day even if it's just a brisk walk.

1. Stop worrying and be happy. Everyone looks better when they smile even with a wrinkly face!

My lovely Mum is in her late 70s and she does all the above too and she still looks wonderful.

Bigbuttons My face, it's wonderful for sinuses and headaches. It also works to firm up the skin just above the eyelids and helps with the eyebags. Plus the mouth (it must be working because I lost a much filled tooth a few months ago and a new one is growing) I'm 64!!

I do the salaam exercise every morning which means I don't have flabby upper underarms. There are good ones for the liver and kidney function plus neck and shoulders and boobs, they are exercises not spot massages. As I said upthread the book I use is lost; I pick and choose what I do from it.

My list to help with ageing is

Oil pulling (I have nice white teeth)

Hardly drinking any normal tea or coffee. Plenty of filtered water and herbal teas though.

A little best red wine (very little because I don't like the black teeth look )

Paul Mackenna diet, his way of eating is brilliant

Plus I follow the Blood Type diet. So I have no pains or arthriticky things.

There are a couple more but I don't want to bore you.

Hi all. Great thread. May I ask hackedoffnow/bigbuttons where you get your retin A? Can you describe your regime and the results?

ppeatfruit thanks for that info! I am interested in the face stuff. My sinuses are really blocked atm. Got a horrible cold on holiday in Morocco last week and I still have mucus pouring from my sinus down my nose and back of my throat! ( sorry to put that image in your head!)
I have had a quick look for info on the face work, but I can't find anything simple. I don't suppose you know the name of the book or have any good websites I could take a look at?
My underarms are good as I use weights but am interested in anything. You are not boring me at all!
I do oil pulling when I remember.

Rabbit I have always got mine from a website called pharmacy Geoff uk. It ships from Thailand I think. I have never had issues with ordering from there. On recent face threads ( amazing faces) lots of people who started to use it got their stuff from eBay without any problems.
It is best to start with a low strength. i think 0.025 is the weakest. You HAVE to start slow with retin A. Your skin my be a rhino hide like mine or it might be very sensitive.
Expect initial skin sensitivity and peeling. That is normal, but your skin soon adjusts. it is also imperative to use a good sunscreen as the retina A makes your skin sun sensitive. you should be using a sun screen everyday anyway, even in the winter in the uk!

It's not this book is it? ( hopeful) www.amazon.co.uk/Complete-System-Self-Healing-Exercises/dp/0942196066

thanks bigbuttons, I buy my bimaprost from Pharmacy Geoff to grow my eyelashes (my top tip) so I'm already familiar with them.

I am off to order retin A!

I use that too. Blimey I use everything! Actually I have found castor oil to be very effective for eyelash growth too!

I would always opt for pharmaceuticals over organic solutions.

YES Bigbuttons Thanks for that you found it!

Iam thinking about having my eyelashes dyed actually (I've had one short sighted eye lasered very successfully. I don't need glasses or lenses at all except when I'm driving at night) so i'm not totally against any intervention .

Has anyone had their lashes dyed? Mine are long and thickish but very fair so you can only see them when I wear mascara and that always gives me the panda eye look!

Hooray!! Think I'll order a copy then!
I dye my own ppeatfruit. I like the effects. My eyelashes are dark, long and thick, but sometimes I don't want to wear mascara.

I really don't have much time free for regular beauty treatments or visit to the hairdressers (or the income to afford them) but has worked well for me is:

• a style and colour consultation (if you can't afford both have your colours done and get one of those old Trinny and Susannah books. The least prone to be out of date is The Rules. Knowing what to wear and what colours suit you takes years off you and saves you £100s.

• I always wear spf products be it make up or 50+ sunscreen on days out.

• DO NOT SUNBATHE ever, but if you insist... Build the tan gradually, a couple of hours a day (never between 11 and 5).

Which dye do you use? How do you do it? I've got sensitive skin.

I do find that a good treatment for sinus problems is turmeric Buttons it stops my runny nose dead. Sorry not a good image there I know (I don't usually have dairy because of those reactions, so if I do have some I go to my turmeric and or echinacea capsules)

ppeat I used to have my lashes dyed but then started dyeing my own because it was cheaper. I think the stuff was called Dylelash but I was never happy with the results. I have sensitive skin too and it stung like hell.

These days I don't dye or use mascara as I've decided it was too harsh a look for me and that I actually I prefer the pale lashes effect. I wear specs so my eyes are framed anyway.

Thanks Floisme Did it sting when you had it done professionally? I use a very gentle hair colour but it might not be right for eyelashes.

Yes it still used to sting a bit but not as much as she had a steadier hand than me.

co-ordinated outfits. I have never ever bothered with this before but have recently realised that I cannot get away with just chucking on an old T-shirt and knackered leggings anymore, I just look like I have slept under a bridge.

The best tip I've found on this is to make sure your your whole outfit (including accessories) has no more than 3 colours. Such an improvement. I am slowly weeding out the odder stuff in my wardrobe and replacing it with navy/black/brown basics (with lighter shirts/scarves etc)

I am 44, so older than some!

Things I find have helped:

Getting colours/style done, it is only a guideline but can really get you back on track to finding your style

Not necessarily wearing more classic clothes (really not me and makes me feel frumpy) but better fitting/quality clothes. Not always expensive, just suit you more. I like keeping up with trends but am more likely to "dilute" the trend into my own style rather than go whole hog e.g. I have a tasselly bag and some new fringy boots but won't be wearing them both together.

Keeping a good weight, neither too fat or thin: I like paleo/primal as it involves eating lots of good foods e.g. avocados, spinach, oily fish etc. Keeps my skin good too.

Moderate exercise e.g. lots of walking, weights, yoga, gardening etc. I probably need to do more cardio.

I have done and need to start again Eva Fraser's facial exercises.

Trying to prioritise sleep (have sn dd who's sleep at the moment is a 'mare), if not meditation - I like Headspace app.

All these things make me feel strong and fit and well, which make you look better.

I will look at that Internal Health book and the retina a stuff too.

I didn't mean that to be so long!!!!

Agree a lot with a good night's sleep, makes a huge difference

And co ordinating your outfits

I live in Fr, 50% of the time and most of them dress well to go out so I've upped my game and feel much better for it!

Also a good haircut to suit your face, not particularly trendy but not 10 years behind the times either.

I find rinsing my hair in softened water makes it a lovely soft texture.

Wasn't too long Quirky

This thread is dangerous. My bank balance is looking sad now...
I hope the things I bought work

Ah. I just read that I need to start with very low dose Retin A. Oops. So what will happen if I go straight for the stronger stuff absolutely have not bought it nope will it dissolve my face ?

And what else do I need to use with it? How?
A list would be good for that treatment routine.
Hyurolic acid orally? or on the skin?