For those of us going grey

[SilveryFoxyMe]

Forgive the name change, but I reckon this post makes me fairly recognisable.

Anyway, last year I posted my dilemma as to whether to continue dyeing my hair or let nature take over and see what was really lurking under there

I bit the bullet after yet another hair dye ending up brassier than I had hoped and not lasting at all, and decided to grow it out.

Eight months on (I do have short hair) it's all gone, and I am almost completely silver, with a few smattering of darker.

At just 47 I appreciate this is not the societal norm, and in some people's eyes has aged me. One friend pretty much commiserated with me and my hairdresser is horrified.

But in the past month I have been for two job interviews, been offered both jobs, and been invited out in a date (long story, I am happily married and he mistakenly thought I was single).

Several people have told me it looks fab, a neighbour came up to me to say I had inspired her to go for it.

My face still looks fairly youthful, I think, but at first glance people might think I am much older. Yet I still got the job offers and the date! More attention that I have had in years!

So if you are swithering, I would heartily recommend it.

[Notgrumpyjustquiet]

I stopped dyeing mine about 2 years ago, I'm early 40s and had been dyeing/ bleaching/ god knows what since mid teens. I decided that natural grey hair couldn't possibly look worse than massive grey roots and if I didn't like it I could always go back to colouring it. I have to say, I think it does look a lot better now. I'm curly and brunette and most of the grey is round the front like a Mallon streak. I think it looks great the way the greys twirl round the curls with the brown. As pps have said, key to it is a good cut and use of whatever styling products are required to keep it in good condition and tidy. I think it's looking frazzled and frumpy that makes women (and men too) look older, not grey hair.

[NanTheWiser]

At 68, I suppose I SHOULD be grey! I decided to stop highlighting my mousey hair about 20 years ago, and have never regretted it. I get compliments about it, especially when I'm at my hairdressers having a cut and blowdry. I don't really like dyed grey hair, as often it looks a bit obvious, and I think, more ageing than naturally grey.

This is me...

[redshoeblueshoe]

Nan that looks great

[ObeseDenise]

Nan you look amazing!

[NanTheWiser]

Why, thank you kindly! (Big ego boost here!!)

[midnightvelvetPart2]

Loving the pics on here, we have some very lovely women on MN :)

So, I have a bit of grey but its coloured by the hairdresser every 2 weeks & I have a bob. If I decided to grow out the grey just how hideous would it be, is it better to go short first? I can't really go blonde or else I'd have brown regrowth with a bit of grey in & blonde ends.

[SomethingOnce]

What a shame that women are the ones policing this bullshit.

Certainly, it has a lot to do with ideas about being acceptable to men, but it's within our collective power to fuck it off, surely?

I don't think most dyed hair looks that great, as it happens. Maybe some people have the money to throw at frequent visits to expensive salons (and nothing better to spend it on), but there's so much unpleasant coloured, badly damaged hair around, and unless you do the roots frequently, that looks pretty rubbish as well.

We are deluding ourselves and it's an expensive and toxic delusion, IMO.

Healthy grey hair, on the other hand, looks amazing, as evidenced on this thread

[SomethingOnce]

Gorgeous, Nan!

[holmessweetholmes]

I'm 43 and have just started spotting my first couple of grey hairs. I'm determined not to go down the dyeing route, as it must be hard to quit once you've started. Hard to tell what kind of grey I'm going to go, as I only have a couple so far, but those seemed to be very pale silvery (my hair is mousy /light brown and was blonde when I was a child).

[SkodaLabia]

Ooh, Nan, you're a fox!

I'm convinced that some people think they look washed out with grey hair because they're not wearing colours that suit them, but you really suit that grey top.

[jamaisdeux]

Nan you look fabulous! for you for looking so great.

[brusselsproutwarning]

midnight I'm wondering the same, which would be best ,chop it up short first or dye it a lighter shade first?

[ouryve]

Agree about the top, nan. That and your hair colour look lovely together on you.

[SomethingOnce]

bonzo, Denise, ouryve and OP all looking fantastic, too.

Really, what is up with this fear of grey?

[jamaisdeux]

Ohh, just seen bonzo obese silveryme and ouryve.

All fantastic!

Just back from Toni & Guy with a dreadful brown colour when I had previously been blonde, but to cover it, they turned me brown. I am going to follow the new trend.
I can't be arsed any more.

[BrowersBlues]

Amazing pics, each one gorgeous. That is me decided. I am going to let mine go grey. At 48 it is stil pretty dark which runs in our family. There are however some grey hairs appearing.

I was completely dreading the dye thing for the rest of my life. My hair is really thick and hard to work with so having to dye it and do the roots every month would be torture for me and I just couldn't face the hairdressing bills.

Well that's a relief. Some truly stunning hairstyles on here. Thanks for posting pics you brave ladies!

[tagz]

I've just come back from the hairdresser's after having my hair dyed. 47 and haven't had it done before, despite having quite a few white hairs. Wanted it done though for tomorrow (it's my graduation ceremony) as whilst I wasn't bothered before about going grey, realised that I looked as if I had fallen asleep face down on a freshly painted white canvas (yes it's an art degree). My friend tried to 'remove some paint' from my hair a few weeks ago! I had silvery wings.

[morethanpotatoprints]

I am currently growing brown hair dye out.
The decision came because whichever dye I tried ended up a brassy auburn which didn't suit me at all.
The silver sort of sparkles in with the very dark, not quite black hair.
My problem is that I have very curly hair and it looks weird, not sure what sort of style would help. Unless my hair is one colour I look like cocoa the clown in a wig.

[SomethingOnce]

My problem is that I have very curly hair and it looks weird

I bet it doesn't.

[QueenOfCats]

Oh my goodness - you guys all look stunning! Nan - I'd love love love hair like yours!

I'm 36 and have long dark hair but have had lots of greys for the last 8 years or so.

I'm fed up with dying it myself, can't afford to go to the hairdressers every 4 weeks - that's how quick my greys come through - so I think I'm going to ditch the dye!

Couple of questions though - should I chop it short and lighten it? I'm very fat and worried about looking like a large round thing with a small round thing stuck on top
Should I leave the length as it is and strip the colour myself?

[neverputasockinatoaster]

I started going grey at 25.
I have never coloured my hair mostly because i can't be arsed! Plus the hairdresser is where I go if I absolutely HAVE to.

I have mid back/bra strap length hair. My fringe is pretty much pure white, the top is silvery and the back is mouse brown with a tinge of red.

It is me. It is how I am. I love watching how the grey progresses through my hair and how it changes with the years.

And, just to add further scandal... I don't wear makeup either.

[CainInThePunting]

Everyone looks great with grey hair!
Well this thread pretty much convinces me to throw in the dye stained towel.
I currently have about an inch of re growth under home dyed blonde hair which is a bit brassy.
I'm going to keep a log to remind myself never to reach for the dye kit again!

[Listmaker]

I really hope we're all setting a trend here although there's not much sign of it among my friends. As you say SomethingOnce why is it that all the women I know feel they have to be tied to the tyranny of hair dyeing when none of the men I know dye their hair and look great with some grey etc?

I first spotted the grey getting too much to just pluck out when I was 30 and started dyeing it myself. I felt too young to be grey but you don't realise what you're letting yourself in for and the angst of it all.

Once I'd made the decision to let it grow out it felt very freeing!

My hairdresser has no clients with grey hair apart from ladies with very short hair/pixie crops. There's this thing that anyone with long grey hair looks witch-y...well I'm not buying it and am determined to rock my shoulder length grey curls .

[NoStannisNo]

See, im 34 and if I started.going grey tomorrow then I think I would just let it come through, perhaps semipermanent it occasionally, but not be that bothered about it.

However, I have been going grey since I was about 17 and have been religiously dyeing it pretty much monthly ever since. If I started letting my 90% grey hair grow out tomorrow, everyone would be like 'what the fuuuuuck has happened to your hair?' and it would just attract way too much attention for me to be comfortable with (maybe I am flattering myself with how much people would actually care though!)

Also, I do think it's ageing and, given that looking quite young is one of the few things I have going for me appearance size, I'm just not ready to make that sort of statement!

[NoStannisNo]

Appearance wise - that should say